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RFK Jr apologizes to sexual assault accuser, apology not accepted

Brainwormed independent presidential candidate Robert F Kennedy Jr last week apologized to former family babysitter/assistant Elia Cooney after Vanity Fair published some of her diary entries detailing a sexual assault that had occurred in 1998, the Washington Post reports.

“I have no memory of this incident but I apologize sincerely for anything I ever did that made you feel uncomfortable or anything I did or said that offended you or hurt your feelings,” Kennedy wrote to Cooney in a text on July 4th. “I never intended you any harm. If I hurt you, it was inadvertent. I feel badly for doing so. If you feel comfortable, Id [sic] like to tell you this by phone, and preferably, face to face. I recognize that this might not be possible. I have no agenda for sending this text other than making the most sincere and ernest [sic] amends,” he continued. Jesus Christ, what an asshole.

Cooney told the Post she was disgusted for obvious reasons. “It was disingenuous and arrogant. I’m not sure how somebody has a true apology for something that they don’t admit to recalling. I did not get a sense of remorse… Meet ‘face to face?’ What woman wants to do that?” she said.

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