Amazing how a political movement that returned to power on a mantra that can be approximately summarized by “Red Lobster filing for bankruptcy is so much worse than hundreds of thousands of people dying of COVID and a deadly assault on the United States Capitol” doesn’t realize that turning that around on themselves is not just ineffective but actually making things worse.

They really can’t just come up with some kind of new fake outrage like Critical Race Theory or public schools grooming children to become trans or Mr Potato Head’s cock to distract their key demographics from the steady pile-up of unforced errors? The party that weaponizes inattention to context is literally trying to draw attention to context here? Americans expect better bullshit than this moron acting as though there isn’t plenty of growth potential in that bottom bar.

Evidently having decided that it wasn’t enough to have failed to implement “election integrity” or effect “regime change” in Iran so hemight as well put his party deeper in the hole on healthcare policy too convicted felon President Trump on Sunday posted, “The Unaffordable Care Act, sometimes referred to as ObamaCare, must be replaced by payments being made directly to THE PEOPLE, so that they can buy their own Healthcare, rather than to bloated and uncaring Insurance Companies. ObamaCare is not and, never has been, sustainable!” Such an extraordinary individual!

A $300 million USAF E-3 Sentry AWACS command and control plane was destroyed in Friday’s Iranian attack on the Prince Sultan Air Base in Saudi Arabia, Air and Space Forces Magazine reports.

Per Bloomberg’s Josh Wingrove it’s the first ever loss of an aircraft of this type. No president in American history has ever had this happen to the Air Force. It’s unprecedented, amazing.

pic.twitter.com/qBUPdkeJbu

— GOP (@GOP) March 29, 2026

Convicted felon President Trump’s regime is, according to the Washington Post, “preparing for weeks of ground operations in Iran” in the form of a series of limited raids and similar types of missions rather than a full-on occupation of the country. Still a fucking insanely stupid idea.

Former frenemies apparently turned allies once again Stewie Rhodes and Enrique Tarrio – leaders of the Oath Keepers and Proud Boys, respectively, were at the the Dallas No Kings protests on Saturday afternoon where at least one person, apparently an Oath Keeper, was arrested at around 3 PM for tussling with a lib demonstrator, Fox 26 reports in a very thinly detailed article.

The specifics matter less than the fact that the seditious conspirators – who would’ve spent the next few decades in prison had their Orange God Emperor not freed them – were there at all, the most reliable sign that they’re feeling threatened. Those two shitbags and their terrorist cosplayers didn’t bother to show up to either of last year’s No Kings protests, simply because they felt confident that the previous four years had just been an interregnum, a little hiccup on the road a thousand-year MAGA Reich. Now barely a year in and once again the Proud Keepers are, by their very presence, signaling that MAGAism cannot maintain a popular, small-d democratic mandate among the people.

There always has to be the threat of violence implied. Right back to form, like 2020 never ended.

Rotating coverage of the third of these wildly successful nation-wide demonstrations.

Responding to a complaint brought by DirecTV, a California federal judge late Friday temporarily halted the merger of TV station affiliate chains Nexstar and Tegna and ordered a hearing for next week for the parties to answer more questions about the Trump-loyal media cartels’ plans – already approved by corrupt incel FCC chair Brendan Carr – to consolidate control over vast swathes of American television media markets, especially after Nexstar unilaterally preempted Jimmy Kimmel’s show on its ABC affiliates late last year because the host had dared to mock the convicted felon president’s bizarre and far from sympathetic reaction to the assassination of Charlie Kirk.

Colorado Attorney General Phil Weiser tweeted “BREAKING – The judge in our case challenging the Nexstar-Tegna merger (9News and Fox31) just issued a temporary restraining order, blocking the companies from merging. On April 7th, the judge will consider the request to bar the merger while we make our case to stop it permanently,” which was a little fib by omission as it was DirecTV’s parallel case, not his and other Blue States’, that landed the hold. The same judge, Troy Nunley, is overseeing both, so Weiser wasn’t necessarily lying when he said “the judge in our case.”

Shitty Nexstar-owned political news site The Hill has not printed a story about their overlord’s legal setback yet. Instead their most recent article as of 11:25 AM Saturday is headlined “FCC’s Brendan Carr: Trump is ‘winning’ against ‘fake news media’.” Cope harder, you fucking lightweight wieners.

It is the end of democracy if voter ID is not passed https://t.co/l5VRstc6ea

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) March 28, 2026

Fun fact: Despite having starkly warned prior to last year’s Wisconsin state Supreme Court election that “the future of Western civilization is very much in the balance right now” and pissing away upwards of $20 million only for MAGA candidate Brad Schimel to lose by 10 percent – maintaining the bench’s 4-3 liberal majority – there’s no reporting indicating that Elon Musk has spent a single dime supporting the conservative candidate in next month’s race, Maria Lazar, whose loss in defense of a seat currently held by Nazi hell witch Rebecca Bradley would put the right in a 5-2 hole.

So yeah, one might reasonably ask what the fuss is if society’s already in ashes.

Harry Wait, the Wisconsin MAGA asshole who “proved” voter fraud by illegally putting fake names and addresses into the state’s online absentee ballot request form system, was convicted Tuesday night on two misdemeanor counts of election fraud and one felony count of identity theft for his mind-bogglingly pointless 2022 scheme, the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel reports. Seriously, this guy’s plot was arguably dumber and less effective at validating MAGA conspiracy shit than former Mesa County, Colorado Clerk Tina Peters‘s exposure of her Dominion Voting System passwords.

At least she might theoretically have exposed security vulnerabilities. Wait’s “pentest” exposed nothing that could ever have been consequential for “election integrity” in the Badger State.

Not very long story short, Wait visited the state’s absentee ballot request website and put in Republican state Assembly Speaker Robin Vos’s and Dem Racine Mayor Cory Mason’s names but Wait’s home address and successfully ordered Mason’s ballot to be mailed to him. He did it again with at least eight other people’s names, all of them fellow “Stop the Steal” assclowns. Wait then tried to hand Mason’s unopened ballot to Racine City Clerk Tara McMenamin’s office but was told they could and would not accept it. So instead Wait tried to show it to a patrol deputy under Racine County Sheriff Chris Schmaling – a fellow MAGA asshole whose later refusal to investigate Wait led to the state attorney general‘s office taking the lead – while Schmaling publicly validated the scam.

You already guessed what the headline means. The New York Post reports that the fat fuck thinks he’s going to rename the Strait of Hormuz the Strait of America – or the Strait of Trump.

“We are taking the Strait back. It’s guaranteed, and they will never blackmail us on that strait. You can take it to the bank,” one minion told the Post and was apparently actually serious. “He does believe that if we’re going to guard it, if we’re going to take care of it, if we’re going to police it, if we’re going to ensure free safety through it that, why should we call it that Hormuz?”

A Minnesota federal judge on Friday tossed the Trump regime’s lawsuit against Minnesota over the state’s laws regarding in-state tuition for undocumented students, Politico’s Kyle Cheney reports.

Friendly reminder to the “skeptics” in the National Zero audience: You could have it so much worse than being asked to merely entertain the idea that extrasolar intelligences older and thus more advanced than ours developed superluminal travel and have established on our planet a presence of unknown scope to surreptitiously observe us from their craft as a means of scientific research.

You really could. You could have someone who aspires to be the next President of the United States telling a barely-closeted podcaster that, during the very small handful of plausible encounters with the occupants of these crafts documented over history, the witnesses were actually seeing demons, as in supernatural religious/Biblical entities, that assume the appearance of space aliens to fulfill whatever the fuck crazy bullshit he and these other Christian “dominionist” freaks believe.

Plus if you had to choose you damn well know which one you’d rather be right: The guy whose fringe beliefs are grounded in science and fairly simplistic anthropomorphic projections, not the one whose fringe beliefs come from the fucking Left Behind books and other pop eschatological trash.

President Trump is delivering on his promise to restore the American dream as stocks are now more affordable for so many! The Dow Jones Industrial Average on Friday dropped 793.47 points to 45,166, the Nasdaq down 459 points to 20,948, and the S&P 500 by 108 points to 6,368, per CNBC.

Convicted felon President Trump on Friday signed the order to ensure TSA agents get paid, Fox News reports. Meanwhile on Capitol Hill the House GOP’s incompetence seems very, very much ready to actually extend the DHS shutdown because Republican members want changes – which will void the bill the Senate passed overnight and require a re-vote in the other chamber.

The Senate will be in recess for the next two weeks. House Republicans know this.

“With continued pressures in the global economic landscape, we’ve made the decision to increase the prices of PS5, PS5 Pro, and PlayStation Portal remote player globally. We know that price changes impact our community, and after careful evaluation, we found this was a necessary step to ensure we continue delivering innovative, high-quality gaming experiences to players worldwide.”

“The updated recommended retail prices for PS5 consoles are effective starting April 2, 2026 as follows. For all other territories, please check with your local retailer or direct.playstation.com where it is available,” says a Sony Playstation blog post now announcing a special price of $649.99 for a standard PS5, $599.99 for the one without the disc drive, and $899.99 for a PS5 Pro with enhanced graphics and more storage space, effective April 2. Last year Sony jacked up the prices of each model by $50 each while sole competitor Microsoft’s Xbox models – top tier Series X is already at the $649 price point and the lower-performance, disc-less Series S model sits at $399.

All those spikes came after “Liberation Day” last year. The Xbox Series S launched at $299, Series X and PS5 standard at $499, and the PS5 digital at $399 in November 2020 in the weeks after convicted felon President Trump suffered his defeat to Joe Biden. The PS5 Pro debuted at $699 two days after former Vice President Kamala Harris suffered hers to Trump. Now in under two years, solely attributable to the “Golden Age,” both brands’ main models cost $150 more than at launch.

“The [Minnesota Democratic Paty] has been drunk at the wheel in protecting taxpayer dollars from systemic fraud. There are over $1 Billion dollars worth of reasons Minnesotans are ready to chart a new path,” said Republican Minnesota State Representative Elliot Engen in a September 2025 tweet.

“On March 27, 2026, at approximately 1:51 am, the White Bear Lake Police Department conducted a traffic stop near the intersection of 4th Street and Otter Lake Road in White Bear Lake for observed traffic violations, including speeding, expired registration, and an inoperable headlight. The driver, a 27 year-od male identified as Minnesota State Representative Elliot Engen, was arrested for suspicion of driving while impaired. Engen was transported to the White Bear Lake Police Department, where a breath test indicated a blood alcohol concentration of 0.13. He was subsequently booked into the Ramsey County Adult Detention Center on a charge of fourth-degree DWI and later released from custody. The case has been forwarded to the city’s prosecuting attorney for processing. There is no additional information to be released at this time,” said the White Bear Lake PD in a March 2026 tweet after Engen was arrested for being drunk at the wheel.

The dipshit’s trying to run for State Auditor too, according to the Minnesota Reformer, lol.

Jackass FBI Director K$H Patel’s old personal emails from circa 2011 to 2012 were stolen and posted by an Iranian-linked hacker group this week, CNN reports while kind of correctly downplaying Tehran’s boast that they breached “impenetrable” FBI systems with their mad coding skillz.

“This isn’t an FBI compromise – it’s someone’s personal junk drawer,” said cybersecurity researcher Ron Fabela, remarking on the utterly boring content like Patel looking for an apartment.