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Fat Rapist hits new low of 32 percent approval in QU poll

Quick semi-correction to Tuesday night’s article about convicted felon President Trump reaching the lowest approval rating in the Economist/YouGov weekly survey: The sentence “this week’s Economist/YouGov national survey finds Donald at his lowest approval rating ever in their history” is technically true because 34 percent approve is the lowest ever. It’s just not the first time they found him at 34 percent, since a May sampling did come back with that same approval number. However the finding was still a “new record” because net approval at negative 28 is indeed the lowest ever.

The same problem does not exist with Thursday’s Quinnipiac national survey as 32 percent approve is the lowest ever for the fat fuck in absolutes. “Thirty-two percent of voters approve of the way Donald Trump is handling his job as president, while 58 percent disapprove, with 10 percent not offering an opinion. Trump’s 32 percent approval is an all-time low approval rating for him in a Quinnipiac University poll,” the write-up says, making the record unambiguous.

Also on Wednesday CNN dropped a new survey finding Donald at 34 percent approval overall and at 78 percent among Republican respondents, which they write is an all-time low with his party.

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Secret Service surveilled James Comey prior to indictment

Convicted felon President Trump’s minions ordered Secret Service agents to monitor former FBI Director James Comey’s location on a warrantless “exigency tracking” of his cell phone, justified by an “imminent threat to life or limb,” that supposedly existed when Comey drove home to Northern Virginia from North Carolina in May 2025 in the immediate aftermath of the “8647” seashells Instagram post, Politico reports as though the whole situation wasn’t fucking stupid enough.

It gets better than Team Orange acting as though Comey was going to storm the White House with an AR-15: FBI agents were ordered to pore over Bureau records to find any and every reference to find out that Comey “knew” that “86” means “kill” in mafia parlance, something nobody actually “knows” and – surprise! – they couldn’t find shit so they interviewed Sammy “The Bull” Gravano. The once-famous turncoat told them that mobsters would never actually use “86” in conversation because it would be too obvious, so really the case is that Comey is both stupid and nefarious.

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Orange Fuhrer’s approval now at 34 percent: Economist/YouGov

For over a decade now, convicted felon President Trump’s approval ratings as president and candidate were always stuck in a band often described as “low ceiling, high floor” by the same class of tiresome and mediocre political pundits that would also throw around “take Trump literally but not seriously” and then not do anything to explain what the fuck that was supposed to mean. That that it might in fact actually be “seriously but not literally” says about everything you need to know.

But the first of those cliches of the highly overrated and deeply uninteresting in the opinion class was, on top of being more accessible, largely pretty true with very few exceptions during Trump’s ignominious reign atop the Republican Party and the most powerful office in the world. Trump’s approval very rarely stayed above or below the low 40s in most mainstream polls, which itself was a sticky layer on top of that low-30s range of overall respondents that would always agree with the most maximalist MAGA positions, like 32 percent who last July told the same pollster he was never involved in Jeffrey Epstein’s crimes to 40 percent approve. The 30 percent overall respondents last September – also an Economist/YouGov survey – who called Trump honest vs the 39 percent who approved. The 36 percent (slightly above the range) who in 2024 told ABC/Ipsos the fat fuck won his sole debate against Kamala Harris vs 46 percent who said they were going to vote for him.

Could continue with plenty more examples but you got the gist and more important is the reality that decade-old delta appears to be closing as this week’s Economist/YouGov national survey finds Donald at his lowest approval rating ever in their history: 34 percent to to 62 percent disapprove.

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Florida seniors get special recognition from Governor Ron DeSantis

Two Florida seniors citizens, James Duckett, 68, and Dominick Occhicone, 80, are set to become part of state history on Tuesday after Goverbor Ron DeSantis signed special orders recognizing them for their unique life stories, Local10.com reports on an exciting day for in the Sunshine State.

Okay, sure. DeSatnis signed their death warrants. Both are set to be executed via lethal injection at Florida State Prison in Bradford County – Duckett at noon for the 1987 rape and murder of an 11 year-old girl and Occhicone later on in the day for the 1986 double murder of his ex-girlfriend’s parents. Both are notable for separate reasons as the case against Duckett – an on-duty police officer on the night of the murder – is still the subject of some lingering doubts, although in 2003 one of his most outspoken advocates publicly did a 180 and concluded Duckett was indeed guilty.

Occhicone meanwhile will be the oldest inmate executed in Florida history. Put together the two’s capital punishments will mark the first double execution day in the state since 1964. So it really is kind of a special occasion – even without the obnoxious omissions in the headline and lede.

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Vexatious invalid plainly not keeping up with lawyers’ day-to-day

“BREAKING NEWS: The Failing New York Times, after 10 years of harassment, slander, and libel, just failed again in their desperate attempt to have our powerful Defamation Lawsuit against them dropped. As we requested, the Highly Respected Judge has called for an updated complaint, which will lay out, in extreme detail, all the ways in which The Times has repeatedly and consistently acted, with actual malice in defaming me, my family, our Great MAGA Movement, and America, itself.”

“We will continue to hold The Times and their ‘comrades’ in the Mainstream Media accountable for publishing, promoting, and dealing in Fake News,” posted convicted felon President Trump on Monday after nothing actually happened in the case in court as there was no hearing scheduled.

It was three weeks earlier that the Florida federal Judge Steven Merryday tossed the Times’s attempt to move the case to SDNY. The fat fucking idiot is evidently unaware that his lawyers last October had filed the amended complaint after Merryday rejected the first one for, among other inanities lauding how “‘The Apprentice’ represented the cultural magnitude of President Trump’s singular brilliance, which captured the zeitgeist of our time” in a federal civil complaint.

Meanwhile, a different Florida judge on Monday ruled that the fat bastard must turn over private info about his personal finances to the BBC for discovery in his lawsuit against them, lol.

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Texas MAGA Congressman under House Ethics investigation

“Pursuant to House Rule XI, clause 3(b)(8)(A), and Committee Rules 17A(b)(1)(A) and 17A(c)(1), the Committee on Ethics has extended the matter regarding Representative Lance Gooden, which was transmitted to the Committee by the Office of Congressional Conduct on June 10, 2026. The Committee notes that the mere fact of a referral or an extension, and the mandatory disclosure of such an extension and the name of the subject of the matter, does not itself indicate that any violation has occurred, or reflect any judgment on behalf of the Committee,” says a notice from the House Ethics Committee posted Monday.

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Japanese Pokemon fandom now even more dystopian

Facing the same deranged and often violent market for their products in the US, the Japanese wing of the Pokemon Company last week announced that their stores in the fictional cartoon fighting animal brand will now employ facial recognition technology in order to throttle the rampant scalping of new releases in the Pokemon Trading Card game, Kotaku reports. “To ensure compliance with appropriate entry and purchase rules, we will be using a facial recognition system to verify the identity of customers aged elementary school age and older when they enter the store and receive their numbered tickets,” the company said in announcement, the “tickets” being a voucher that allows the bearer to actually purchase a box of the increasingly expensive collector-sought cards.

This is on top of the May policy announcement that buyers will need to present a Japanese government-issued ID to buy certain cards and/or enter the “lottery” to get the chance to buy other certain cards or boxed collections ahead of their releases to the company-owned retail stores.

It’s not clear when the new GOP line will be “You need to show a photo ID to buy Pokemon cards in Japan, therefore you should have to show it when you vote in American elections.”

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Newspaper missing from McConnell proof-of-life photo

Nearly-dead Kentucky Senator Mitch McConnell’s office on Monday announced, per Punchbowl’s Andrew Desiderio, that Mitch “continues his recovery from a fall at home in June. OAP physicians visit with the Senator every day, discussing all aspects of his rehabilitation care. Since his discharge from hospital care, he has maintained a strenuous course of physical therapy and rehabilitation, including multiple sessions a day designed to rebuild strength and reduce the risk of future falls.”

“His bout with childhood polio continues to be a significant factor in his mobility. He is not yet medically cleared to leave the rehab facility and return to the office,” the statement continued.

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Cracker Barrel CEO to step down

Despite having survived the immediate “controversy” over the aborted logo redesign last August that prompted legions of overly vocal crackers to erupt in outrage and cost investors $100 million, Cracker Barrel CEO Julie Masino is headed for the exit, the Wall Street Journal reports.

Former Outback Steakhouse CEO David Deno will take over on August 10th. It’s not clear if this means that Cracker Barrel will begin offering its own version of the Bloomin Onion.

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“Remember, stupidity always brings LOSING AND DEATH!”

“John Thune should not allow the United States Senate to ‘leave town’ until it passes The Save America Act or, far better still, TERMINATES THE FILIBUSTER, where Republicans can then quickly pass everything they ever dreamed of, including a full and deep throated SAVE AMERICA ACT, the Budget, and the ever looming Debt Ceiling disaster, 1929! The Dumocrats will do it on day one, and can’t believe how lucky they got with this Senate leadership. Remember, stupidity always brings LOSING and DEATH!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Monday, continuing his obsession.

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Orange Mental Patient goes on weird, dark AI slop shitpost binge

Gravely ill both mentally and physically for years, convicted felon President Trump has obviously always had a love of posting insane bullshit and nonsensical memes. This, however, seems like a serious escalation… “It’s our oil tanker now” was stupid once so why the hell post it four times?

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Brooklyn scooterist suffers minor injuries in scooter accident

An anonymous 42 year-old Brooklyn scooterist suffered extremely mild injuries when he lost control of a rented Lyft scooter on a bike bath in Baltimore on Sunday morning, National Zero reports and yes this actually happened, lol. No, I did not go the hospital nor did I need to, and I simply righted the scooter and continued on my way to a nearby Catholic church to attend a baptism mass.

Pain is like a 2 out of 10. I am fine. This is not the reason it’s been 27 hours since the most recent article so much as a symptom of the same cause: out-of-town social obligations, hotel stay, nine hour-long party, so on. At the same time, my own scooter crash happening the day after the “scooterist” story was too friggin funny not to lead with in the headline and opener here.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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