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Mar-a-Lago grand jury to vote on Trump indictment

Prosecutors with Justice Department special counsel Jack Smith’s team will put a Trump indictment to the federal grand jury investigating the Mar-a-Lago documents case on USC section 793, which concerns any offense committed in “gathering, transmitting or losing” any “information respecting the national defense,” sources within the DOJ tell the Independent.

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Trump tells Haberman nobody told him he’s getting charged yet

Disgraced former President Trump told New York Times reporter Maggie Haberman he has not been told he’s going to be indicted for stealing classified documents from the White House following his defeat to Joe Biden yet, despite a report from douchebag propagandist John Solomon saying otherwise (which was actually sent out as a BREAKING NEWS push notification to Truth Social users). “It’s not true,” Trump called Haberman to tell her just minutes ago.

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Clarence asks for more time to file 2022 financial disclosure

The Administrative Office of The US Courts on Wednesday published the annual financial disclosures for seven of the nine justices of the Supreme Court, the Washington Post reports while noting that the two missing are far right assholes Samuel Alito and Clarence Thomas.

The Post says Alito has done this in the past so there’s nothing particularly suspicious about it (as of yet). The same can’t be said of his BFF Clarence, whose other friend Harlan Crow is likely facing a subpoena after refusing to answer Senate Democrats’ questions about the nature of their relationship and why the fuck Clarence’s mom lives rent-free in a house owned by Crow, flew to Indonesia on his dime, paid for his adopted son’s tuition, so on and so forth. Clarence now gets a 90 day extension to list everything Crow and likely others have “gifted” him with in accordance with new ethics rules that specifically include private jet travel and “personal hospitality.”

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Volcano mad

Volcano on island in middle of big water place with lots of sharks in it very mad. Government science guys say volcano spewing lots of gooey hot red stuff that hurt a lot and burn people to death if they touch. “Don’t touch hot red stuff,” say government science guys. Volcano was mad a few months ago but turned happy and pleasant. Now volcano mad again for some reason. People who wear flower shirts and eat pineapples worried volcano might get really mad and burn their pineapple trees. Big uh-oh if volcano get really mad. No relaxing and playing ukulele if red hot stuff come down from volcano. Government science guys say they keep watching volcano to see if it get madder.

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Comer intros contempt resolution for FBI Director Wray

“Resolved, That Christopher Wray, Director, Federal Bureau of Investigation, shall be found in contempt of Congress for failure to comply with a congressional subpoena. Resolved, That pursuant to 2 U.S.C. §§ 192 and 194, the Speaker of the House of Representatives shall certify the report of the Committee on Oversight and Accountability, detailing the refusal of Christopher Wray, Director, Federal Bureau of Investigation, to produce documents to the Committee on Oversight and Accountability as directed by subpoena, to the United States Attorney for the District of Columbia, to the end that Director Wray be proceeded against in the manner and form provided by law. Resolved, That the Speaker of the House is authorized to take all appropriate action to enforce the subpoena,” says moron James Comer’s resolution to hold FBI Director Chris Wray in contempt for failing to (fully) comply with his subpoena for the FD-1023 that Rudy Giuliani probably has a copy of.

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Budowich confirms he testified to new Florida grand jury

“Today, in what can only be described as a bogus and deeply troubling effort to use the power of government to ‘get’ Trump, I fulfilled a legal obligation to testify in front a federal grand jury and I answered every question honestly. America has become a sick and broken nation – a decline led by Joe Biden and power hungry Democrats. I will not be intimidated by this weaponization of government,” and blah blah blah tweeted MAGA Inc Chairman Taylor Budowich on Wednesday, confirming earlier reports special counsel Jack Smith had put him on the hot seat.

We should note that besides MSM reporting we don’t actually have any confirmation that this grand jury is specific to the Mar-a-Lago docs case. Budowich, a former Trump White House minion who has been interrogated by House January 6th Select Committee investigators has issued statements before about the classified documents investigation, but outside of that we would have to question if that’s DEFINITELY the case this new grand jury is examining. Notably Budowich himself doesn’t give any such details in his tweet, just describing it in general “witch hunt” bullshit terms, without adding any company lines about Trump having declassified the documents automatically just by thinking about it or whatever. Our understanding is that Mar-a-Lago employees and other witnesses traveled to DC to testify to the first grand jury, which raises the question of why come to them, especially while the Mar-a-Lago classified documents theft case is reportedly wrapping up.

With the all-important caveat that we’re not lawyers and we don’t know shit, we’re going to raise the possibility that, since the January 6th coup attempt investigation has one grand jury in DC and the Mar-a-Lago docs case has another, this third grand jury in Florida means Jack Smith’s team are pursuing a whole other investigation into the Orange God Emperor and his minions.

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Long Island funeral home tycoon charged with Capitol riot felonies

Long Island funeral home chain vulture Peter Moloney, known for ghoulishly capitalizing on the publicity for his racket gained by hosting missing white girl Gabby Petito’s wake back in September 2021, was charged Tuesday with a litany of felonies for spraying wasp killer on cops and attacking members of the media during the January 6th MAGA insurrection at the US Capitol.

Sedition Hunters had identified the son of a bitch from photos as early as April 29, 2021. We get why the FBI and the DC US Attorney have to take their time with some of these assholes given the sheer number of them – and that a guy with a chain of funeral homes is less likely to go on the run than some trailer trash hick. That said, we think Moloney should’ve been made a priority earlier given his discrete lack of moral character displayed in this jerk piece by industry news site Funeral Leader.

“We started talking about how we could exceed expectations – how our organization could represent not only ourselves but the funeral profession in the highest regard. We took that really seriously on how important this was,” Moloney told the site in an article with numerous pics of Petito’s wake, including one of the outside of the parlor with two fire trucks holding up a giant banner in front of the Blue Point, New York Moloney Funeral Home location. Again, this was nine months after Moloney had tried to help Trump overthrow American democracy.

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NOW the fanboys want to trust what Bill Barr says

Awfully interesting how just a day after Bill Barr said Trump’s looming indictment for stealing classified documents is “not a case of the Department of Justice conducting a witch hunt” and “they approached this very delicately and with deference to the president, and this would have gone nowhere had the president just returned the documents. But he jerked them around for a year and a half,” and two days after Trump called Barr a “weak and slovenly man” for not doing anything to overturn the 2020 election over some other interview, and we could go on over their now years-long back and forth shit talk, that now spandex-wearing grapple freak Jim Jordan is happy to take Barr’s word for it simply because this time he’s saying exactly what Republicans want to hear.

Anyway, Barr told the Federalist that an investigation into the Bidens “was not closed down” and “On the contrary, it was sent to Delaware for further investigation.” And those are the only two quotes they use in the “exclusive” article meant to carry a whole “debunking” of Jamie Raskin’s briefing to the media after he and violent pro-choice activist James Comer viewed the now-legendary FD-1023 document. The problem for Jordan and pals is that on Monday the Washington Post reported that sources within the Justice Department now, in 2023, told them the investigation was in fact closed, writing “the allegation contained in the document was reviewed by the FBI at the time and was found to not be supported by facts, and the investigation was subsequently dropped with the Trump Justice Department’s sign-off, according to the people familiar with the investigation.”

It’s unlikely Barr is deliberately lying so much as he got his wires crossed with the ongoing legitimate investigations into Hunter Biden for his taxes and the gun permit, or that he wasn’t confused and the Federalist purposely twisted his words to make it sound like what fanboys want to hear. They certainly don’t want him to talk about the other shit he’s been saying publicly lately.

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Arizona Secretary of State Adrian Fontes tells rural MAGA county don’t even fucking think about counting ballots by hand

Dem Arizona Secretary of State Adrian Fontes on Tuesday informed the Board of Supervisors in rural Mohave County that he knows what they’re up to and they’re going to find out if they fuck around with ditching tabulators to start counting ballots by hand next election, VoteBeat.us reports.

“Hand counting ballots is incredibly prone to human error, which results in a time-intensive process to arrive at correct, final results. However, even assuming correct results, state law does not allow county boards to unilaterally substitute a hand count for certified and tested electronic tabulation equipment,” wrote Fontes to Mohave the board a day after they voted nearly unanimously to request a proposal plan to hand-count ballots going forward. In a statement to VoteBeat Fontes added that “any plan to initiate a full hand count of ballots for a future election would put [county election] officials in serious legal jeopardy, including possible criminal liability, for violations of state law.”

Even more stupid for Fontes is how he’s still stuck dealing with this shit after a judge last November ordered similarly MAGA, rural Cochise County to halt their planned hand count after the 2022 midterms. A letter sent last month to all 15 counties by credibly accused domestic abuser and far right state Senate Majority Leader Sonny Borrelli last month falsely claiming a non-binding resolution declaring ballot tabulation machines illegal was actually binding certainly did not help the situation.

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Wyden threatens Clarence’s sugar daddy with subpoena

Responding to Nazi memorabilia collector and Clarence Thomas’s sugar daddy MAGA billionaire Harlan Crow’s refusal to answer questions from Democrats, Senate Finance Committee Chairman Ron Wyden on Tuesday threatened to subpoena Crow, raising the question of why threaten it rather than just going ahead and fucking doing it already to show that they mean business on this.

“It comes as little surprise that Mr Crow is doubling down on bogus legal theories as he continues to stonewall basic questions about his gifts to Clarence Thomas and his family. If anything, the most recent letter from his attorney raises more questions than it answers. The letter states, ‘charter rates or reimbursements at rates prescribed by law were paid to the Crow family entities’ with zero additional detail that could help clarify these financial arrangements, such as exactly who made those payments for Justice Thomas’s extravagant luxury travel, and how many times and in what amounts those payments were made. Far too often, efforts to investigate real life tax practices of the ultra-wealthy and powerful end with this kind of vague, carefully-worded assurance that everything is on the level. That’s simply not good enough. This is exactly why the Finance Committee is pursuing this matter as part of its broader review of gift and estate tax practices of ultra-high net worth individuals. I’ve already begun productive discussions with the Finance Committee on next steps to compel answers to our questions from Mr Crow, including by subpoena, and those discussions will continue,” wrote Wyden in a statement.

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RNC launches “Bank Your Vote” to try to sell MAGA on voting early

Republican National Committee Chairwoman Ronna Not-Romney McDaniel on Wednesday hailed the launch of “Bank Your Vote,” an all-too insider-y named effort to talk MAGA voters out of their bone-deep distrust of early and/or mail-in balloting which cost the party dearly in 2020 and 2022.

“To beat Joe Biden and the Democrats in 2024, we must ensure that Republicans bank as many votes as possible before Election Day. Because of the efforts to Protect Your Vote in 2022, grassroots Republicans like you should feel comfortable Banking Your Vote in 2024. The Bank Your Vote initiative encourages GOP voters (like YOU!) to get your vote in and make absolutely sure that your voice is heard in the critical 2024 elections,” wrote the RNC’s marketing department in the launch announcement without actually offering any examples of how the party worked to “Protect Your Vote” last year and ignoring that assholes like Kari Lake are still carrying on with “fraud” claims.

“In all 50 states, your Republican Party will be working hard to get our voters to vote by mail or early in-person, and ballot harvest where permitted. We can’t do it without you though – so share this site with family and friends to make sure they bank their vote, too!” the announcement continued.

It’s not clear yet how this effort will be received by the few Republican voters who actually see it, but judging by the Gateway Pundit’s reaction to Ronna pitching the same last year on Steve Bannon’s show, probably not very well. The other problem here likely lies with the use of the word “Bank.” Like we said it’s already too technical and “establishment” insider jargon-y, as if Ronna assumes every Republican voter reads the Cook Political Report regularly. Then there’s also that, while it’s not quite as prevalently dirty as “harvesting” (which she also uses here) in the minds of MAGA Nation, “bank” already carries some negative connotation in this context. So best of luck to Ronna and her official “Bank Your Vote” ambassadors Byron Donalds and Bill Hagerty.

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Bolsonaro facing election court trial over false fraud claims

Disgraced former Brazilian President Jair Bolsonaro this month will face a non-criminal trial in front of a seven-judge panel in the country’s election court over his false claims of fraud in the 2022 election he lost fairly to now-President Luiz Lula, the New York Times reports, adding that Bolsonaro could be barred from running for office again for eight years if convicted.

This of course is separate and apart from any criminal charges Jair the Jerkoff is looking at for his multitude of other offenses, related to the election and otherwise. Just last month federal cops raided Bolsonaro’s home and seized his phone as part of an investigation into whether he fakes his COVID vaccination record in order to be able to enter the United States after losing the election.

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We’re doomed: Arctic summers may be iceless sooner than thought

A new study published in the journal Nature says the Arctic Ocean may see its first iceless summer much sooner than expected because of the impact of manmade climate change, according to the Washington Post, marking a sad benchmark in the fight to curb climate change.

Original estimates said the Arctic would have minimal ice coverage by the 2050 decade, but new studies show that the ice will disappear in summer during that decade, not simply recede, even if humankind limits temperature increases to under two degrees Celsius.  The loss of ice makes reforming the icepack more difficult as the temperature rises, and scientists fear that with increasing global temperatures, the potential for a permanently iceless Arctic is higher in the next three decades.

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Feds warn QAnon Shaman to stop fucking around or else

“Even if Chansley were ultimately successful in advancing a meritorious claim to vacate his conviction (which, the government submits, he is unable to do), the case against him would not be dismissed. Rather, Chansley’s guilty plea would be withdrawn, the charges in the indictment would be reinstated, and the case would proceed to trial – where Chansley, if convicted, could face up to 20 years’ imprisonment. Chansley therefore may wish to consider whether the ‘relief’ that he could obtain through these claims is truly preferable to preserving the benefits of the Plea Agreement, under which he was sentenced to the minimum sentence under his calculated guidelines range.”

“Additionally, Chansley has not presented any arguments regarding a known defect in the colloquy, a lack of voluntariness in the plea, or a claim of actual innocence,” write DC federal prosecutors in a footnote on page 14 of their opposition to Jacob “QAnon Shaman” Chansley’s motion to vacate his conviction, not very subtly warning the famous Capitol rioter they’ll take him to trial, win, and send him back to the Big House for much longer in the unlikely event he’s successful in getting it tossed.

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Luna claims Bidens have mole in FBI codenamed “One-Eye”

MAGA Congresswoman Anna Paulina Luna – already known as a basket case even before she got elected last year – seems to have seen The Departed one too many times and thinks the “Biden Crime Family” have a mole in the FBI keeping them one step ahead of the investigations into them.

The mole’s codename is “One-Eye.” It’s not clear if this is a physical attribute like “One-Eye” literally has one good eye and an eyepatch or glass eye or if it’s simply a nickname. Luna at least sort of anticipates a major loophole in her story and explains that even though entire FBI is corrupt, this “One-Eye” character is like super, extra corrupt on top of just regular FBI-level corrupt.

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“Greater Idaho” growing closer to non-reality

The movement for 11 rural MAGA counties in Oregon to break away from the state and join Idaho – something that would require approval from both states’ legislatures not to mention the United States Congress – grows closer and closer to not actually happening as voters have approved measures in each county to move forward on the “Greater Idaho” plan, NBC News reports.

In very much related news, the AP reports the Oregon state Senate remains at a complete standstill as the once again Republicans are boycotting showing up to work to deny Democrats a quorum.

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Jacob Wohl, associate fined $5 million for 2020 robocall campaign designed to scare Black voters away from the polls

Conservative gadfly Jacob Wohl and his colleague Jack Burkman, famous for holding embarrassing press conferences from the front porch of Burkman’s Arlington, Virginia townhouse, were fined more than $5 million by the FCC for robocalling urban voters with false information during the 2020 election cycle.

In an effort to dissuade voters from going to the polls, the pair along with Burkman’s company, made more than 1,100 robocalls telling recipients that if they showed up to vote in the 2020 election, their “personal information will be part of a public database that will be used by police departments to track down old warrants and be used by credit card companies to collect outstanding debts.”  None of that is true.  The recorded call helpfully stated Wohl and Burkman were two of the entities that paid for the calls.

In November 2022, the pair were each sentenced to two years of probation, six months of monitoring with a GPS ankle bracelet, $2,500 each in fines and 500 hours of registering voters in Washington, DC by an Ohio court in a plea to criminal charges related to the scheme.  Felony cases in Michigan and New York appear to still be outstanding.

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Mar-a-Lago grand jury to vote on Trump indictment

13 mins ago

Trump tells Haberman nobody told him he’s getting charged yet

1 hour ago

Clarence asks for more time to file 2022 financial disclosure

3 hours ago

Volcano mad

3 hours ago

Comer intros contempt resolution for FBI Director Wray

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Budowich confirms he testified to new Florida grand jury

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Long Island funeral home tycoon charged with Capitol riot felonies

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NOW the fanboys want to trust what Bill Barr says

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Trump minion testifying to Florida grand jury in Mar-a-Lago case

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