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“Trump Tariff Plans Still in Limbo Ahead of Rose Garden Event”

“Trump Tariff Plans Still in Limbo Ahead of Rose Garden Event” says the headline of a Tuesday night Bloomberg story first printed at 7:44 PM EDT and then updated at 6:44 AM EDT on Wednesday, which was 9 hours and 16 minutes before the 4:00 PM EDT announcement at which the President of the United States will purportedly declare economic warfare against the entire rest of the world.

They’ve now, as of this printing, got 7 hours and 9 minutes left to figure out the precise contours of the plan and as most people who have worked in pressure situations know, there’s nothing like crunch time to spark a little bit of creative magic. These are those golden hours in which they’ll be bouncing a rubber ball off the walls of their conference room littered with fast wrappers and empty coffee cups and then, before you know it, the spark of an idea will burst into a brilliant flame of a plan that will save the American economy, commence a thriving era of domestic manufacturing, leave allies and foes alike begrudging with respect for the Administration and renew a commitment in them to partner with the president on building a fair and equitable global economy.

It could absolutely go like that. It really could. It’s only at like roughly the 2:17 PM mark that if they don’t have anything yet they’ll really have to start to panic and then just frantically slap what little they have together and go out there with a straight face to act like this is a well-considered plan.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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