Hosting some 16 year-old lifeguard who saved someone from drowning recently, convicted felon President Trump on Monday used the Oval Office occasion to embarrass the United States of America, claiming variously that voluminous accounts of horrible conditions being suffered by sailors stationed on the USS Abraham Lincoln are a “CNN fake news report,” that he should be able to build a ballroom on the White House ground because a communist dictatorship has a “Great Hall of China,” and said “Quiet. Quiet. Quiet. CNN, fake news. You’re fake news. You’re a loud – You’re a loud, boisterous person. You’re fake news. Be quiet. Be quiet. Be quiet. You’re a fake reporter and you report fake news,” angrily to a reporter who dared to ask Trump about why he was surrendering to obese North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un. Must’ve been an exciting day for the kid.