Category: Uncategorized

Rejoice America! KPNX reports that Kevin the emu, as in a large flightless bird, was returned home earlier this week, a few days after escaping from her owner’s backyard in Peoria, Arizona.

And yes, Kevin is a “her.” No explanation for this was given, but it would seem that owner Josh Kondziola named her before a vet informed him of her anatomy. Kondziola was more forthcoming about the nature of her escape, believing Kevin had been freaked out by fireworks on New Year’s.

“When we first moved into this house, she did the same thing. She flipped open the gate latch and escaped,” Kondziola said. “But that time it was easy because we watched her get out, and we just went and got her. But we thought we had done the gate up where she couldn’t get out anymore.”

The article was mostly about the search for Kevin and seemed to have been hastily updated after she had been found and brought back to Josh, so there weren’t a lot of details on how it played out.

Still, Kevin the emu has been returned home, safe and sound. In other good news, a Trump store in Bucks County, Pennsylvania is about to close because the owner says local demand for cultist merch has “run its course” and his “Trump 2028” shit isn’t selling all that well. He’s also tired of responding to people who taunt him on Facebook and has given up. “No matter what the president does, they hate him no matter how good anything is,” MAGA merchant Mike Domanico lamented to the AP after being asked to comment on replies to the closure announcement. “Are you no longer winning?” wrote one lib heckler. “Trump must be doing wonders for the economy,” another posted.

National Zero will now resume its regular coverage of mostly horrible, sickening, bad news.

Iran’s Supreme Dictator Ayatollah Ali Khamenei on Friday accused convicted felon President Trump of having hands “stained with the blood of Iranians” who are “ruining their own streets… in order to please the president of the United States,” during protests against godawful economic conditions that have now cost at least 65 lives since they erupted late December, Reuters reports.

“He said that he would come to their aid. He should pay attention to the state of his own country instead,” the Ayatollah said, both sounding like Trump in blaming foreign agitators for legitimate discontent against his own ruinously inept leadership and also kind of maybe having a point about Trump also similarly overseeing a regime that kills, maims, and imprisons innocent people.

“Please be informed that we will no longer let the American Public be ‘ripped off’ by Credit Card Companies that are charging Interest Rates of 20 to 30 percent, and even more, which festered unimpeded during the Sleepy Joe Biden Administration. AFFORDABILITY! Effective January 20, 2026, I, as President of the United States, am calling for a one year cap on Credit Card Interest Rates of 10 percent. Coincidentally, the January 20th date will coincide with the one year anniversary of the historic and very successful Trump Administration. Thank you for your attention to this matter. MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Friday.

So yeah, he’s calling for it, starting January 20th. Let’s see how this plays out.

“The largest Oil Companies in the World are coming to the White House at 2:30 PM. Everybody wants to be there. It’s too bad that the Ballroom hasn’t completed because, if it were, it would be PACKED. We apologize to those Oil Companies that we cannot take today, but Secretary of Energy Chris Wright, and Secretary of the Interior Doug Burgum, will see them over the next week. Everyone is in daily contact. Today’s meeting will almost exclusively be a discussion on Venezuelan Oil, and our longterm relationship with Venezuela, its Security, and People. A very big factor in this involvement will be the reduction of Oil Prices for the American People. Additionally, and perhaps most importantly of all, will be the stoppage of Drugs and Criminals coming into the United States of America. Thank you for your attention to this matter!” the fat bastard posted earlier.

BREAKING: Alpha News has obtained cellphone footage showing perspective of federal agent at center of ICE-involved shooting in Minneapolis pic.twitter.com/p2wks0zew0

— Alpha News (@AlphaNews) January 9, 2026

How this is supposed to be helpful to Ross’s case is not clear. None of this is a good look.

Spandex-wearing grapple freak Jim Jordan has one way or another been cowed into allowing former Trump crimes special counsel Jack Smith into testifying to the House Judiciary Committee during a live public hearing at some yet-to-be determined date this month, CBS’s Scott MacFarlane reports.

The US Supreme Court on Friday did not issue a decision over convicted felon President Trump’s power to unilaterally impose tariffs on American consumers, Politico’s Josh Gerstein reports.

Following an incident in which Code Pink protestors heckled convicted felon President Trump at a restaurant in DC a few months ago, the fat bastard’s minions reported now-former Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene to the Secret Service on the suspicion that she had tipped the libs off to his unannounced visit to Joe’s Seafood, a spot that Greene had recommended to Trump, Axios reports.

Greene tells Axios it’s “an absolute lie, a dangerous lie. I would never do that,” and that she had recommended it, but never knew if or more importantly when he would actually go. “The story you should be writing is why didn’t the Secret Service sweep the restaurant,” QAdulteress added.

Axios writes that the September 9th protest was seen as a point of no return for the relationship between Trump and Greene – and that minions have zeroed in on her as the only possible suspect.

A theater professor has been reinstated at Austin Peay State University in Tennessee was reinstated to his job and awarded $500,000 late last month after being fired for sharing an article saying “Charlie Kirk says gun deaths are ‘unfortunately’ worth it to keep 2nd Amendment,” shortly after the MAGA propagandist was assassinated during a September event in Utah, the Tennessean reports.

Darren Michael will also get reimbursed for the therapeutic counseling he required after the firing, lawyer David King said, adding his client is “exploring future options” against those who “interfered with (Michael’s) First Amendment rights,” but did not name those parties. The article however mentions that MAGA Senator Marsha Blackburn had tweeted a screenshot of Michael’s post on which, it should be noted, he did not write any additional comment on top the article headline.

Great, now she’s going to have to hand it over to him to not get shit in exchange – as that would entail an actual regime change in Venezuela, which requires effort – and then he’ll consider himself the actual laureate, just like that time when he “won” some stupid golf tournament the same way.

"(ICE officers) were not in danger of being injured or hurt by the vehicle at all."

CNN obtains new video from a witness who was just five feet away from where the victim's car crashed in Minneapolis. She shares what she saw with Erin Burnett. pic.twitter.com/NNJIA1U59R

— Erin Burnett OutFront (@OutFrontCNN) January 9, 2026

At least two people, a man and a woman, have been shot and wounded by CBP agents in Portland on Thursday, KOIN reports on more MAGA reich violence being inflicted on Americans. The two reportedly called 911 themselves and police responded to take them to a local hospital.

“We are still in the early stages of this incident. We understand the heightened emotion and tension many are feeling in the wake of the shooting in Minneapolis, but I am asking the community to remain calm as we work to learn more,” said Portland Police Chief Bob Day, who probably will not learn more since it’s unlikely the Trump Regime is going to cooperate with their investigation.

At least 17 Republicans joined with all Democrats to pass a clean three-year extension of the Obamacare premium subsidies, not making Senate Majority Leader John Thune’s job any easier.

“Biden ignored the Housing Market, and instead was immersed with High Crime, Open Borders, runaway INFLATION, the Afghanistan Disaster, and a Military that he left in Chaos and Confusion. Everything was broken, but I, as President of the United States, have already fixed it! Now, I am giving special attention to the Housing Market. Because I chose not to sell Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac in my First Term, a truly great decision, and against the advice of the ‘experts,’ it is now worth many times that amount – AN ABSOLUTE FORTUNE – and has $200 BILLION DOLLARS IN CASH.”

“Because of this, I am instructing my Representatives to BUY $200 BILLION DOLLARS IN MORTGAGE BONDS. This will drive Mortgage Rates DOWN, monthly payments DOWN, and make the cost of owning a home more affordable. It is one of my many steps in restoring Affordability, something that the Biden Administration absolutely destroyed. We are bringing back the AMERICAN DREAM that was destroyed by the last Administration. MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Thursday, using state power to interfere with the free market.

On two separate bills vetoed by convicted felon President Trump this afternoon, 177 House Republicans voted no – on bills that had previously passed both chambers by voice vote.

Convicted felon President Trump’s regime are discussing offering Greenlanders from $10,000 to $100,000 per person to buy them off to take control of the territory, Reuters reports on a plan that just might cause inflation in the vast frozen island of 57,000’s scattered settlements.

“Republicans should be ashamed of the Senators that just voted with Democrats in attempting to take away our Powers to fight and defend the United States of America. Susan Collins, Lisa Murkowski, Rand Paul, Josh Hawley, and Todd Young should never be elected to office again.”

“This Vote greatly hampers American Self Defense and National Security, impeding the President’s Authority as Commander in Chief. In any event, and despite their ‘stupidity’ the War Powers Act is Unconstitutional, totally violating Article II of the Constitution, as all Presidents, and their Departments of Justice, have determined before me. Nevertheless, a more important Senate Vote will be taking place next week on this very subject,” posted angry grandpa Thursday.

Totally agree with him on Susan Collins (well the other ones too, obviously). She should never be elected to the Senate again. In fact she should just end her 2026 bid and retire this afternoon.

“The president, obviously, is unhappy with the vote. I guess this means that he would prefer to have Gov Janet Mills or somebody else with whom he’s not had a great relationship,” said Collins, lol.

Director of National Intelligence Tulsi Gabbard was internally mocked as “Do Not Invite” (because “DNI,” actually pretty clever) and frozen out of the planning for the Trump Regime’s attack on Venezuela because officials were worried she might be principled and object to putting US troops in harm’s way for oil, Bloomberg reports, adding that their sources denied anyone made the “DNI” joke.