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Michigan sheriff prefaces bad news by explaining they found snowmobiler’s helmet near snowmobile-sized hole in frozen lake

In what one might call an exemplar of how to exercise care and compassion when writing a law enforcement press release, whoever has that job in the Mason County, Michigan Sheriff’s office prefaced a tragic discovery by writing that the early Sunday search for two men on snowmobiles, earlier reported missing in the Sheridan Township area, first zeroed in on a set of the vehicles’ tracks leading onto the surface of a frozen lake that did not have tracks leading out of it.

“Due to darkness and heavy snow falling a check of the lake from shore could not be performed. At first light, what appeared to be a snowmobile helmet was seen out several hundred yards offshore on the ice. The Mason County Sheriff’s Office launched a drone when weather permitted and spotted a hole in the ice and confirmed a helmet present at the spot of the hole. Rescuers attempted to get to the area, but kept falling through the ice, make rescue efforts impossible,” the release said, making it sound like they really tried to effect a “rescue” after God knows how long.

“The Michigan State Police Dive Services Team and Mason County Sheriff’s Office Dive Team were called to assistand made their way onto the ice. An airboat from the Manistee County Sheriff’s Office was requested to support recovery efforts and did respond to the scene. Once assets were in place to ensure the safety of divers, efforts began to get to the hole in the ice. An MSP diver fell through the ice, but was properly tethered to another diver, and was pulled from the ice unharmed.”

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Jaydee will tweet about other Brown University shooting victim Mukhammad Aziz Umurzokov any minute now, probably

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The “I didn’t kill my wife I just butchered her corpse” guy convicted

Massachusetts man Brian Walshe, aka the “I didn’t kill my wife I just found her dead, panicked, butchered her corpse, and disposed of the parts” guy, was convicted of first-degree murder on Monday, ABC News reports on what had been a novel defense case not quite flying with the jury.

Prior to the trial, the 50 year-old Walshe pleaded guilty to misleading a police investigation and improper conveyance of a human body in an attempt to sell the court on the idea that yes his late wife, 39 year-old Ana Walshe, was in a relationship with another guy and had options for her and the three boys, now aged 4 through 8, that she’d had with Brian while he was heading to federal prison on a fraud charge. Yes, he’d Googled divorce lawyers in the days prior to her disappearance on January 1, 2023. And yes, she was dead that morning. BUT he didn’t do it, he just found her dead in bed, and then proceeded to dismember her corpse in a panic because nobody would believe him that she had suddenly died of natural causes during that particular stretch of time.

So that’s why he pleaded guilty to those counts. Not the murder though. That his team contested in front of the jury and lost, possibly because “Ways to dispose of body parts after murder” was in his search history. We’ll never know if “Ways to dispose of body parts after accidental death” might have given the jury a little less to work with when weighing if the burden of proof had been met.

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Villagers for Trump leader reincarcerated after ballot fraud verdict

The saga of former top “Villagers for Trump” official Robert Rivernider Jr is a genuine slice of MAGAmericana and can really only be told in a straight line: In 2013 Rivernider was convicted of a $20 million Ponzi scheme in a Connecticut federal court and sentenced to 12 years in prison but was released due to the COVID pandemic in 2020, promptly moving down to live with his father, Robert Rivernider Sr, in The Villages, Florida. Shortly thereafter, Rivernider Sr caught the ‘Rona and died on October 19, 2020. Then on October 29, the county clerk’s office received Rivernider Sr’s mail-in ballot, signed and dated the 16th, but postmarked on the 23rd. No mystery who the vote was for.

At some point Rivernider got himself a spot on the board of Villagers for Trump and, hilariously, became a coordinator for racist psychopath Laura Loomer’s doomed 2022 primary campaign against the vast corporate retirement community’s Republican Congressman Dan Webster. It wasn’t until 2023 when the Sumter County Clerk’s Office gave his old man’s ballot to the sheriff’s office for investigation, leading to his arrest that September. Rivernider was represented by none other than Anthony Sabatini – then also running a doomed primary against Webster. Sabatini put up no defense and Rivernider was convicted. Being white and MAGA however, he only got 180 days in jail.

It’s not clear how long ago Rivernider completed that 180 day bid, but either way he had been out as of June, when federal law enforcement arrested him on what Villages-News.com reports was a violation of the conditions of his supervised release – for which he was sentenced to three years in the federal joint last week. The article isn’t clear on whether the state-level voter fraud charge was that actual violation or if it was something else. Still one less MAGA on the streets no matter what.

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QAdulteress thus far the only Republican reacting to Trump’s post

“Rob Reiner and his wife were tragically killed at the hands of their own son, who reportedly had drug addiction and other issues, and their remaining children are left in serious mourning and heartbreak. This is a family tragedy, not about politics or political enemies. Many families deal with a family member with drug addiction and mental health issues. It’s incredibly difficult and should be met with empathy especially when it ends in murder,” tweeted rogue soon-to-be-former Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene on Monday, the only Republican thus far to react to the Orange Tyrant’s batshit insane Truth Social post mocking the brutal murder of the outspoken liberal.

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President declares Rob Reiner a tragic victim of TDS violence

“A very sad thing happened last night in Hollywood. Rob Reiner, a tortured and struggling, but once very talented movie director and comedy star, has passed away, together with his wife, Michele, reportedly due to the anger he caused others through his massive, unyielding, and incurable affliction with a mind crippling disease known as TRUMP DERANGEMENT SYNDROME, sometimes referred to as TDS. He was known to have driven people CRAZY by his raging obsession of President Donald J Trump, with his obvious paranoia reaching new heights as the Trump Administration surpassed all goals and expectations of greatness, and with the Golden Age of America upon us, perhaps like never before. May Rob and Michele rest in peace!” posted President Trump on Monday, mourning the murder of an outspoken Hollywood lib in his own way.

And yeah if this were some National Zero satire you would’ve been underwhelmed by the lack of finesse, subtlety, and – most importantly – a “theory of the case,” as in how Reiner and his wife were murdered because of “TDS.” Like if they’d committed suicide that’d be one thing, but the way Trump tells it he seems to be saying that Reiner was somehow targeted (?) by someone he drove crazy with his “TDS”-induced rants. Is that what the President of the United States is saying here?

How’s that funny even in the MAGAverse’s internal “logic”? There’s not even any way to bridge it to a place like “Reiner was anti-Trump → Which means he was pro-crime → A criminal broke into Reiner’s home and stabbed him and his wife to death [even though their son Nick Reiner was just charged with their murders] → Therefore, Reiner got what he deserved for being a pussy liberal → LOL, Trump wins again, libs.” The best efforts to spin it will go like “LMAO! Trump just made libtards’ heads EXPLODE! See how he throws the media into a tizzy with just one post?!?! Still the GOAT!!!”

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“We won’t allow you to ruin President Trump’s reputation”

A Saturday IDF strike that killed deputy Hamas military wing commander Raed Saad and three other people – who may or may not have been actual terrorists – prompted convicted felon President Trump’s regime to privately order Israeli dictator Benjamin Netanyahu to stop fucking around and threatening the tenuous “ceasefire” that the Orange Tyrant claimed to have brokered, Axios reports.

“The White House message to Netanyahu was: ‘If you want to ruin your reputation and show that you don’t abide by agreements be our guest, but we won’t allow you to ruin President Trump’s reputation after he brokered the deal in Gaza,” a “Senior US official” told Axios, with “reputation” the short-hand for “talking point used to prop up Trump’s bullshit claim to being a ‘peace-maker.'”

You can give it to Trump for having secured the release of the last 20 living hostages in October. There’s no un-ringing that bell, which is why he should’ve just made that the win. However also worth mentioning is that 81 of the negotiated releases from captivity were brokered solely by the Biden Administration in November 2023, another 33 primarily by Team Biden in January-February 2025, and then the final 20 after the October 2025 “ceasefire” that “Bibi” was never going to realistically respect for another three years let alone move toward a permanent solution.

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James Woods could’ve just said he’s devastated, minus the politics

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K$H fucks up again: “Person of interest” released in Providence

The suspect arrested in the Saturday mass shooting at Brown University in Providence, Rhode Island, has been released and local cops are blaming the FBI led by incompetent idiot Director K$H Patel, NBC News reports. “It was actually picked up by the FBI and they followed through with it and they ended up coming and locating this individual of interest,” said Providence Police Department Chief Colonel Oscar Perez at a press conference on Sunday night.

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US Air Force tanker nearly collides with JetBlue flight off Curacao

A JetBlue flight departing from the Dutch Carribbean island of Curacao bound for New York’s JFK was forced to halt its ascent on Friday after it nearly collided with a US Air Force tanker supporting patrols off the coast of Venezuela, the AP reports on what sounds like another near-DEI disaster.

“We almost had a midair collision up here,” the JetBlue pilot told Curacao air traffic control “They passed directly in our flight path… They don’t have their transponder turned on, it’s outrageous.”

“We just had traffic pass directly in front of us within 5 miles of us – maybe 2 or 3 miles – but it was an air-to air-refueler from the United States Air Force and he was at our altitude,” the pilot continued. “We had to stop our climb.” The pilot said the Air Force plane then headed into Venezuelan air space, per the recording. No comment from the Pentagon in the AP’s article.

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Voters trust Dems over GOP 53 to 47 on affordability: NBC poll

“Over half of all Americans (53 percent) said they trust the Democratic Party over the Republican Party (47 percent) when it comes to handling the rising price of everyday things,” says the final paragraph of NBC News’s reporting on their own monthly national survey, which is, uh, not an issue the party had the corner on last year. In fact you could say they suffered the worst defeat in history because of that issue and their inability to lie about it like the other party did so freely.

Ughhhh, seriously fuck this “The grass is greener on the other side” shit. Republicans win, they fuck everything up, Dems get elected. A trans swimmer wins 5th place in the NCAA final, inflation spikes, a white girl gets murdered by a Venezuelan scumbag, Republicans win. We’re now back in the “fuck everything up” phase of this cycle again. Wash, rinse, repeat, all thanks to the lovely goldfish brained voters of Arizona, Georgia, Michigan, Nevada, North Carolina, Pennsylvania, and Wisconsin.

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Nine dead in shooting during Aussie Hanukkah celebration

Nine victims are dead along with one gunman in a shooting at Sydney, Australia’s Bondi Beach on Sunday – a massacre that coincided with the city’s local “Chanukah by the Sea” celebration in the vicinity, though officials have yet to confirm that it was indeed the target – the AP reports.

Of course it was the target, but authorities in other countries tend to be weird about the details of certain incidents. They did however mention that another suspect was shot and arrested at the scene of the attack – and that a number of suspicious items were recovered.

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Orange Fuhrer mourns troops killed in non-peaceful Middle East

“We mourn the loss of three Great American Patriots in Syria, two soldiers, and one Civilian Interpreter. Likewise, we pray for the three injured soldiers who, it has just been confirmed, are doing well. This was an ISIS attack against the US, and Syria, in a very dangerous part of Syria, that is not fully controlled by them. The President of Syria, Ahmed al-Sharaa, is extremely angry and disturbed by this attack. There will be very serious retaliation,” posted convicted felon President Trump on Saturday, a year after he campaigned on Biden being a reckless idiot with no regard for soldiers’ lives. And two days after he said “We actually do have a real peace in the Middle East.”

The shooting occurred at the gate of a US military outpost near Palmyra, the AP reports. Donald later told reporters This was an ISIS attack… we will retaliate,” as he left for the Army-Navy game.

He later posted “Getting ready to land at Fort McHenry for my short drive to the Army-Navy Game. Everyone is asking who am I supporting, Army or Navy? My answer is: ‘You must be joking if you think I’m going to answer!'” Very sensitive. Might’ve well have said “Go Losers! Beat Suckers!”

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Team Orange tells donors they’re counting on Supreme Court for midterms help and other grim GOP tales Axios printed week

If, before Tuesday, you were one of the likely tens, maybe dozens, of hardcore MAGA voters who reads Axios regularly it’s hard to see how you’re still on board on Saturday as you were not at all reading what you wanted to be reading from them. This week was bad, very bad, and bad in an array of unique ways requiring a roundup summary to fully capture this December of GOP sadness:

Start with this list of bullet points literally headlined “Scoop: Trump aides bullish on Supreme Court boosting GOP in midterms,” from Tuesday in which two of convicted felon President Trump’s top minions, former 2024 campaign manager Chris LaCivita and pollster Tony Fabrizio, told the audience at an RNC donor retreat in New Orleans last weekend that rulings “on political contribution limits and congressional redistricting could be transformational for Republicans – if they go the GOP’s way” as their hard sell to get the donors to write the party some big checks to cover their 2026 bills.

First off, lol at an Axios article reporting what was said at an RNC donor retreat. Way to make sure that the marginally poorer GOP donors who weren’t invited to the bacchanal got the memo on the strategy. Then there’s that the memo itself is “the Supreme Court could come though for us big on these rulings,” and not like, “the White House and Congressional GOP have this bold new plan to address voter concerns about the economy and cost of living, so this is worth your investment to help us maintain the majorities,” or even just “Hey, we’re focus grouping the best propaganda campaign ever, it blows the doors off of caravans, rainbow fentanyl in Halloween candy, and trans kids playing girls’ sports. Spoiler alert: SOROS is the main villain. MAGA voters HATE Soros!”

Next there’s the anticipated rulings themselves: What the hell gerrymandering decision are they counting on besides the potential VRA overturn opening the door to killing something like 10 to 12 Black-majority districts in the Deep South? Even if it is gutted it’s extremely unlikely to come in time for the 2026 midterms. Beyond that the court already this month strongly hinted the country’s a free-fire zone on partisan redistricting going forward in the ruling greenlighting Texas’s MAGA gerrymander and won’t block the ones favoring Dems, mainly California’s Proposition 50.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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