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Secretary of Date Rape Defense Pete Hegseth and his minions are considering a new recruitment campaign centered around the achievements of non-military veteran Charlie Kirk, using the slogan of “Charlie has awakened a generation of warriors,” in the propaganda, NBC News reports.

Yeah, that’s the stage of, um, grief that the regime is at now. GI Charlie, an American Hero.

Asked about the campaign, Pentagon spokesman/female torture fetishist/abusive husband father Sean Parnell told NBC “The media is so desperate to attack this administration’s success that they are now inventing lies about our recruitment efforts. Leadership matters, and under the strong leadership of President Trump and Secretary Hegseth men and women are coming out in droves to serve this great nation.” Guess Sean doesn’t really like the idea… Until they roll it out.

In an interview aired Thursday convicted felon President Trump assured Fox’s Martha McCallum that the economic good times will probably kick in “in about a year or so” which we were to understand that the economy was already doing spectacularly well soooo… Yeah what a fat fucking idiot.

“The TRAPPIST-1 system offers one of the best opportunities to characterize temperate terrestrial planets beyond our own solar system. Within the TRAPPIST-1 system, planet e stands out as highly likely to sustain surface liquid water if it possesses an atmosphere. Recently, we reported the first JWST/NIRSpec PRISM transmission spectra of TRAPPIST-1 e, revealing significant stellar contamination, which varied between the four visits. Here, we assess the range of planetary atmospheres consistent with our transmission spectrum. We explore a wide range of atmospheric scenarios via a hierarchy of forward modeling and retrievals. We do not obtain strong evidence for or against an atmosphere. Our results weakly disfavor CO2-rich atmospheres for pressures corresponding to the surface of Venus and Mars and the cloud tops of Venus at 2σ.”

“We exclude H2-rich atmospheres containing CO2 and CH4 in agreement with past work but find that higher mean molecular weight, N2-rich atmospheres with trace CO2 and CH4 are permitted by the data. Both a bare rock and N2-rich atmospheric scenario provide adequate fits to the data but do not fully explain all features, which may be due to either uncorrected stellar contamination or atmospheric signals. Ongoing JWST observations of TRAPPIST-1 e, exploiting consecutive transits with TRAPPIST-1 b, will offer stronger constraints via a more effective stellar contamination correction. The present work is part of the JWST Telescope Scientist Team Guaranteed Time Observations, which is performing a Deep Reconnaissance of Exoplanet Atmospheres through Multi-instrument Spectroscopy,” says the abstract to a new paper by a team at the Space Telescope Science Institute in Baltimore working off of data from the James Webb space telescope.

And yes, TRAPPIST was named by Belgian scientists for that type of beer brewed by local monks.

Does it count as “violent rhetoric” to say “a cheeseburger should kill this fat fuck” and call on some brave cheeseburger to be the one to finally stop his heart? No? Good. Come on cheeseburger.

Convicted felon President Trump has been nagging his underlings to develop a plan to retake control of the Bagram Air Force base in central Afghanistan, abandoned after the 2021 withdrawal from the country, CNN reports. The fat bastard’s objectives in regaining control is to surveil China, whose border is under 500 miles away, gain access to rare earth elements and mining in Afghanistan, establish a counterterrorism node to target ISIS, and possibly reopen a diplomatic facility.

The US Supreme Court will hear arguments in the case against the Orange God Emperor’s stupid, unnecessary tariffs on November 5th, Axios reports on a decision that could probably go either way.

In related-ish news the fat fuck’s scumbag lawyers also petitioned the court to make a decision on whether Fed Board of Governor member Lisa Cook can be fired over that made-up mortgage shit.

Surprisingly the petition does actually make mention of that completely specious justification for her firing rather than just spit out “Trump is president and can do whatever the fuck he wants.”

Alleged Charlie Kirk assassin Tyler Robinson played ‘furry’ porn video games online: report https://t.co/pGvQCZTptF pic.twitter.com/OytWgAO69d

— New York Post (@nypost) September 18, 2025

You will not be surprised to learn that Yahoo News reports media conglomerate Nexstar – owner of The Hill, NewsNation, and dozens of local TV stations – announced Wednesday they were preempting Jimmy Kimmel’s show on their two dozen or so ABC affiliates – which then prompted the network to put him on indefinite hiatus – as they sought FCC approval of their $6.2 billion acquisition of rival outfit Tegna, formerly Gannett Media, owner/operator of 68 local stations.

Also, sur-fucking-prise, there’s no mention of this in The Hill’s coverage of the Kimmel shitshow. On Mediaite, there’s three articles that do so in passing without making the EXTREMELY freaking obvious connection. “Last month, Nexstar CEO Perry Sook praised the Trump administration after the company announced it was acquiring rival TEGNA as part of a $6.2 billion deal, which is pending approval from Carr’s FCC,” they wrote verbatim in two separate stories. Ballsy by their standards considering that, though he quit his nightly NewsNation show in February, founder Dan Abrams said he would remain involved with the network and might’ve appeared on panel segments and what not.

It also hints at what some might’ve already guessed given The Hill’s bent: That Nexstar didn’t actually need to be nudged to preempt Kimmel and did it on their own – and it’s fair to question that they might’ve just done it anyway if they weren’t awaiting approval for the merger.

Maldives President Mohamed Muizzu on Thursday owned the biased fake news media by signing into law a new media regulation statute that empowers him to permanently close down outlets deemed unpatriotic or something. The AP’s article does not actually specify what the criteria are for fining journalists $1,620 and outlets up to $6,485 per violation. Probably kind of the point.

Oh and the law passed 60-0 after 33 opposition MPs were removed for protesting the bill.

The Stardust Racers rollercaoster at Universal’s new “Epic Universe” theme park, which opened in May, is so freaking awesome that a guy was literally thrilled to death on the ride, CBS News reports.

In a statement a park official “was unresponsive after riding Stardust Racers and was transported to the hospital, where the guest later died. We are devastated by this tragic event and extend our sincerest sympathies to the guest’s loved ones. We are fully cooperating with Orange County and the ongoing investigation.” It’s not clear if the official then chestbumped a coworker, slammed a Four Loko, and then crushed the can on their forehead while blasting “Down with the Sickness.”

All jokes aside, is “a dude literally died on that ride” not actually kind of a selling point to zoomers and teenagers who want to get high and then the shit knocked out of them on a coaster?

Experts and policy think tankers constantly sounding the alarm over Chinese technological development outpacing that of the US were handed another chilling data point on Thursday as another major milestone in the communist dictatorship’s rush to become the unchallenged global leader in shaping tomorrow’s world: The first-ever mid-air collision between two flying cars.

The BBC reports that two Xpeng AeroHT vehicles – which really look like oversized drones with like eight propellers arrayed out from the top and not at all like “flying cars” seen in movies like Back to The Future Part II or The Fifth Element – crashed into each other during rehearsals for an airshow in the northeastern city of Changchun. At least one of the two $300,000 octocopters burst into flames, according to footage seen on the Chicom Twitter ripoff Weibo that was probably censored later. The company told CNN the vehicle had “sustained fuselage damage and caught fire upon landing,” and other reports said one person was injured but you should trust that as far as you can throw it.

Convicted felon President Trump has been privately raging over Israeli dictator Benjamin Netanyahu’s unceasing campaign of genocide against the population of Gaza and the botched attack on Hamas leadership inside of key graft source Qatar, the Wall Street Journal reports, citing White House officials overhearing Trump complain “He’s fucking me.”

“Great News for America: Ratings challenged Jimmy Kimmel Show is CANCELLED. Congratulations to ABC for finally having the courage to do what had to be done. Kimmel has ZERO talent, and worse ratings than even Colbert, if that’s possible. That leaves Jimmy and Seth, two total losers, on Fake News NBC. Their ratings are also horrible. Do it NBC!!!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Wednesday, celebrating a massive triumph for free speech in the United States.

The fat fuck then posted he’s “pleased to inform our many USA Patriots that I am designating ANTIFA, A SICK, DANGEROUS, RADICAL LEFT DISASTER, AS A MAJOR TERRORIST ORGANIZATION.”

“I will also be strongly recommending that those funding ANTIFA be thoroughly investigated in accordance with the highest legal standards and practices. Thank you for your attention to this matter!” even though he tried to do this in his first failed term only to let it fall by the wayside after he found out that there’s no such legal mechanism for designating a domestic terrorist organization.

Minnesota Congresswoman Ilhan Omar has been totally and completely exonerated by the House on batshit loser Nancy Mace’s motion to censure her for saying what everyone already knows about Charlie Kirk. Just four MAGAs voted against the censure: Mike Flood, Jeff Hurd, Tom McClintock, and, hilariously, Cory Mills because he’s also facing a censure for being an abusive boyfriend.

Republicans on spandex-wearing grapple-freak Jim Jordan’s House Judiciary Committee on Wednesday voted to table a Dem effort to subpoena the Treasury Department for suspicious activity reports on transactions involving Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell. If Dems were smarter they would’ve added Hunter Biden and been like “What? Why don’t you guys want to see Hunter Biden’s SARs? Why are you covering up for the Biden Crime Family?!?! Did Crooked Joe bribe you too?”

A new Quinnipiac University survey of New Jersey likely voters finds Dem Congresswoman Mikie Sherrill leading Republican 2021 gubernatorial election loser Jack Ciattarelli (headline corrects for proper pronunciation) by 49 to 41 percent ahead of the November election.

St Mary’s Hospital in NE Georgia is closing its labor and delivery service, citing Trump’s Medicaid cuts.

Women going into labor will now have to drive an hour plus to deliver safely.

Way to go, GOP.

— Jon Ossoff (@ossoff) September 17, 2025

How dare socialist Demonrat Georgia Senator Jon Ossoff try to change the subject away from the murder of American patriot Charlie Kirk? What does this hospital have anything to do with the skyrocketing rise of radical left violence that so many Americans see on Fox News and in their “for you” X feed every day? Can’t he even just for a second spare a thought for Charlie Kirk’s wife and his little kids who won’t ever see him livestreaming again? Who cares if Ossoff tweeted about the horrific crime once or twice when he’s said nothing to condemn the sick “Hey fascist, catch!” post by BlueSky user @AbandonKamala696969 or “LMAO Rest in piss, Jew puppet Kirk” by far left Gab user @kek1488 or thousands of others. In fact NONE of the leftards in Congress have answered for the vile garbage that their supporters have said since a decent Christian was so gruesomely murdered in front of college students who came to have an open debate with a 31 year-old man.

Elon Musk should simply ban Jon Ossoff and the rest of the party from X until they apologize for each and every single post that focused too much on Kirk being concerned about a Black pilot or essentially calling Supreme Court Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson a retard and not enough on the positivity he brought to American politics. But even then this post about a hospital should probably be looked at too because it could be inciting people to become violent and hateful.

National Zero will resume our regular coverage after this distillation of how a nation in mourning should feel a week after the devastating 9/10 attack on freedom. Never forget. Never ever.