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Orange Slob got less than four hours of sleep

“I have not reached out to Iran for “Peace Talks” in any way, shape, or form. This is just more HIGHLY FABRICATED, FAKE NEWS! If they want to talk, they know how to reach me. They should have taken the deal that was on the table – Would have saved a lot of lives!!!” posted convicted felon President Trump at 5:20 AM EDT on Tuesday, which would’ve been 4 hours and 5 minutes after “Publicity seeking President Emmanuel Macron, of France, mistakenly said that I left the G7 Summit, in Canada, to go back to DC to work on a ‘cease fire’ between Israel and Iran. Wrong! He has no idea why I am now on my way to Washington, but it certainly has nothing to do with a Cease Fire. Much bigger than that. Whether purposely or not, Emmanuel always gets it wrong. Stay Tuned!”

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Regime reverses again on ICE raids at farms, hotels, restaurants

Convicted felon President Trump’s reich has again reversed course on ICE raids at farms, hotels, and restaurants, now ordering agents to go arrest whoever they want wherever they want, ending for now the exceptions the fat fuck gave to those industries, the Washington Post reports.

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Donald fucks off early from G7 summit

Said Krazy Karoline in a statement published somewhere else: “President Trump will return to Washington tonight so he can attend to many important matters,” per Bloomberg’s Josh Wingrove, who added a “🚨🚨🚨” to his tweet. Trump was supposed to stay in Canada about another 24 hours.

It must be a very urgent matter since the fat bastard posted “Somebody please explain to kooky Tucker Carlson that, ‘IRAN CAN NOT HAVE A NUCLEAR WEAPON!'” and “AMERICA FIRST means many GREAT things, including the fact that, IRAN CAN NOT HAVE A NUCLEAR WEAPON.”

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Mike Lee “surprised to be confronted” by Tina Smith over disinfo

Minnesota Dem Senator Tina Smith, who was among the targets on a hit list carried by MAGA terrorist Vance Boelter over the weekend, was spotted at the Capitol on Monday getting in chemically imbalanced Mormon colleague Mike Lee’s face over his unhinged and blatantly false tweets about Boelter, saying shit like “This is what happens (w)hen Marxists don’t get their way,” and “Nightmare on Waltz [sic] Street,” that he has yet to delete or otherwise address.

“I needed him to hear from me directly, what impact I think his cruel statement had on me, his colleague,” Smith told reporters about their conversation, per Axios. Smith did not share any specifics other than “I think that he, honestly, he seemed a little surprised to be confronted.”

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Tehran possibly about to be nuked by Israelis: Trump

“Iran should have signed the ‘deal’ I told them to sign. What a shame, and waste of human life. Simply stated, IRAN CAN NOT HAVE A NUCLEAR WEAPON. I said it over and over again! Everyone should immediately evacuate Tehran!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Monday.

Yeah, maybe the headline’s an exaggeration but he seems to be legitimately freaked out about something that hasn’t happened yet. Why else would he be warning a city of 10 million to evacuate?

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Rasmussen finds Trump with majority support from Blacks, Latinos

Convicted felon President Trump is at 54 percent and 53 percent job approval ratings from Black and Latino respondents, respectively, Breitbart reports triumphantly, writing “What must be especially demoralizing about these polling results for Democrats is that it was during this same time (June 9-12) that the corporate media launched a jihad against Trump for deporting illegal immigrants out of Los Angeles. The media and Democrats even attempted to blame the two-term president for the violent, left-wing riots in Los Angeles that were encouraged by elected Democrats and only brought under control when Trump sent in the US Marines after federalizing the National Guard.”

Yeah, so Breitbart doesn’t actually link the numbers or the crosstabs or anything like that and it appears to be paywalled on Rasmussen’s site and no fucking way will that happen. Suffice to say it’s unlikely Rasmussen actually polled Black and Latino voters in absolutes proportionate to their share of the voting population. The fact that even it’s just a one percent difference, it’s 54 percent Black support to 53 percent Latino support is actually inverse to the fat fuck’s shares of each in the 2024 election: 16 percent Black voters to 43 percent of Latino voters, per AP VoteCast.

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Villages “No Kings” protest targeted by sprinklers

“For me, the purpose of our ‘No Kings’ gathering was to try and get the rest of The Villagers to understand that our democracy is in jeopardy; our Constitution is under attack. What happened in return? The sprinklers were turned on… possibly to keep us safe by not crossing over to the other side of the street. Unfortunately, I don’t think that may be the case. People were ticketed ($75 fine) while Trump supporters were assisted to get across the street by the police,” writes Villager Sandra Evans to the editor of Villages-News describing some controversy to their Saturday demonstration.

“Trump supporters stood behind us with a large sign ‘Democrats Suck.’ Little do they know the demonstrators were not only Democrats but also Republicans and Independents. Trump supporters drove by with the finger up (guess which one) while others tried splashing us with water. The demonstration was to raise awareness that Trump is off the rails and that the Republican Party is doing nothing to stop him. Trump supporters drove by with the finger up (guess which one) while others tried splashing us with water. The demonstration was to raise awareness that Trump is off the rails and that the Republican Party is doing nothing to stop him,” continued Sandra.

The actual reporting on the protest from the sunwashed Floridian golf cart maze’s website of record makes no mention of the $75 fines but does quote a Jeff Evans – possibly Sandra’s husband – as saying “I too wondered about why the sprinklers were running. A calculated move by The Villages’ powerbrokers to make things uncomfortable for the protesters? That wouldn’t surprise me.”

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Joey Chestnut unbanned from Nathan’s July 4th contest

After a one-year interregnum from some bullshit ban over an endorsement of off-brand vegan hot dogs, the pretty-much uncontested world champion of competitive eating Joey Chestnut will return to this year’s 4th of July Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest at Coney Island, ESPN reports.

Chestnut spent last Independence Day crushing four US Army soldiers 57 to 51 in five minutes, arguably defeating actual Nathan’s winner Pat Bertoletti who downed 58 hot dogs in ten. Chestnut went on to best his longtime rival Takeru Kobayashi 80 to 66 in a Netflix special on Labor Day.

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Saudi journalist beheaded

Saudi journalist Turki al-Jasser, who reported on issues like human rights violations and corruption by the royal family until he was arrested and imprisoned in 2018, was executed most likely via beheading by a scimitar, a large, thick sword wielded by a public servant, Middle East Eye reports.

There’s no official acknowledgement of al-Jasser’s beheading from the United States government, who weren’t shy about decrying false reports of a white genocide in South Africa or the designation of the Neo-Nazi AfD party as an extremist group in Germany. Yet this one will slide.

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Togo president suspends French broadcasters for three months for being too biased to cover his plan to install himself as dictator for life

Tiny west African country Togo President Faure Gnassinge’s government has banned French broadcasters RFI, and France 24 for not being fair and balanced in covering his ongoing attempt to install himself as dictator for life through some constitutional fuckery, the Associated Press reports.

“This measure follows repeated failings, already reported and formally recalled, in matters of impartiality, rigor, and fact-checking. Several recent broadcasts have relayed inaccurate, biased, and even contrary to established facts, undermining the stability of republican institutions and the country’s image,” said the High Authority for Audiovisual Communication in a statement Monday.

“Freedom of the press cannot be synonymous with disinformation or interference,” they added.

Gnassingbe, who has ruled since 2005 after the death of his father, was appointed last month to the powerful and completely made-up title of “President of the Council of Ministers,” a council that he holds sole power to appoint and whom has sole power to reelect him indefinitely.

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Mike Lawler lets everyone know he’s about to fold

Responding to reports that the Senate GOP is reducing the Big Beautiful Bill’s SALT deduction cap to $10,000 from the $40,000 passed by the House, New York Congressman Mike Lawler tells CNN’s Manu Raju “That is the deal, and I will not accept a penny less. If the Senate reduces the SALT number, I will vote NO, and the bill will fail in the House,” weeks before he and enough of the other Blue State Republicans holding out for SALT vote yes anyway at the very last second.

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MAGA televangelist Jimmy Swaggart either dead or almost dead

Back when Henry Kissinger and Ken Starr met their fates over the last few years a certain millennial-aged blogger wrote some very brief perfunctory articles about them, having not been born yet and in elementary school during their respective zeniths of right wing fame and fortune. Contrast this with other moments like the ends of Matt Gaetz’s, George Santos, and Kevin McCarthy’s careers, Tucker Carlson getting abruptly fired from Fox News, the collapse of The Messenger and so on, a valedictory by someone who lived through and witnessed something in the media is always going to be better than one by someone who has to backtrack and do a shit ton of research to write it.

So readers can take the wheel here and enjoy the pending demise of Rev Jimmy Swaggart, according to Fox 8 New Orleans. Swaggart, a prosperity gospel shitbag who tearfully admitted publicly to infidelity after being caught in the 1980s, went into cardiac arrest at 8 AM Sunday morning and hasn’t regained consciousness. “Right now he is in ICU and without a miracle, without a miracle, his time will be short… We’re going to give the Lord an opportunity to work,” said his son Reverend Donnie Swaggart at a special prayer service on Sunday evening at their MAGAchurch.

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Vance Boelter visited two other Dem state lawmakers’ homes

In a briefing to reporters on Monday, Acting US Attorney Joe Thompson detailed MAGA terrorist Vance Boelter’s movements in between the non-fatal shooting of Dem Minnesota state Senator John Hoffman and his wife and the fatal shooting of Dem state House leader Melissa Hortman at their home early Saturday morning. According to Thompson, Boelter visited two other Dem state lawmakers’ homes in nearby towns in suburban Minneapolis-St Paul, finding that his second intended target in Maple Grove was not at home but on vacation with her family.

At this third would-be target in New Hope, a cop who was dispatched for a wellness check on that lawmaker’s home encountered Boelter in his fake police vehicle and asked him what was happening. Boelter ignored her and the cop – unaware that the suspect was disguised as a cop – instead went to the home to check on the intended target as that was her first priority. When backup arrived Boelter had already departed en route to Hortman’s home in Brooklyn Park where he shot her and her husband dead before being forced to flee on foot when real cops showed up.

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Propagandists commiserate over their messiah’s betrayal

Tucker and Sloppy Steve weren’t the only state media personalities in thrall to a dysfunctional theocratic regime having a bad day due to Israel’s bombing campaign in Iran.

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Carney kicks media out after Trump rambles

Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney kicked reporters out of the room at the open of the G7 summit in Alberta on Monday so he could start bilateral talks after convicted felon President Trump wasted time by ranting angrily about Russia being booted from the G8 by Justin Trudeau and Barack Obama, declaring he’s a “tariff man,” and about New York, Los Angeles, and Chicago refusing to submit to his rule. You can watch the whole rant here if you hate yourself.

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“Made in the USA” more of an aspirational than actual selling point

“Get ready to experience the power of TrumpSM Mobile. Our MADE IN THE USA ‘T1SM Phone’ is available for pre-order now. Reserve your phone TODAY!!” says the section of the homepage of TrumpMobile.com on the T1 phone, barely a footnote while the rest of it is about the service.

Which is kind of in tension with what Eric Trump said to Russian asset Benny Johnson: “Eventually all the phones can be built in the United States,” during his infomercial tour this morning. Also note that he doesn’t hold the “T1” up to the camera or offer any information about its specs, even just the basics like storage capacity, dimensions, camera resolution, and so on. You’d think that if he had developed a phone that was superior to – or even competitive with – other top models on the market then there would be a lot of hype about that aspect or maybe some b-roll showing someone using it.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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