Categories
Uncategorized

The Losers Club


Rewind the clock back almost a year. Trump was fucking guilty. Everyone knew he had done what the articles of impeachment had accused him of, which was attempting to coerce the president of Ukraine into announcing an investigation of Joe and Hunter Biden for some poorly-specified allegations of corruption in the country, despite both having already been cleared.

Former Alabama Senator Doug Jones knew it. Jones won on kind of a fluke in a 2017 special election to serve out the rest of the six-year term Jeff Sessions had vacated so he could serve as Trump’s first Attorney General, faced with an extraordinarily weak Republican opponent, twice-impeached racist child molester, Roy Moore. Jones, from the second he won, had to know he was almost certainly doomed in 2020. As a Democrat representing a deep Red State, he faced a choice: Vote to acquit Trump in the hopes that MAGA voters in the state would remember it on election day and maybe reelect him, or stick with his conscience and principles and do the right thing.

Doug Jones did the right thing. Now former Senators Martha McSally, Cory Gardner, David Perdue, and soon-to-be former Senator Kelly Loeffler did not. They put party over country, even though anyone with a functioning brain knew Trump was unworthy of office, they knew he was dangerous, they knew he was incompetent, they knew that Mike Pence would be a much better leader for their party in contrast to the Donald. They voted to acquit so they could get reelected, making the calculation that MAGA voters would immediately destroy them in the primaries. And then they lost.

These four fucking assholes. Maybe it was a safer assumption for Perdue and Loeffler, while the same could certainly not be said for McSally and Gardner (Thom Tillis, Susan Collins, Joni Ernst, and Steve Daines by rights should also be in the picture above, but shit happens). They knowingly voted to acquit an unhinged tyrant, just as the warning signs of a massive pandemic that he was not even remotely mentally equipped to deal with were starting to surface.

So for those keeping score at home, here’s where things stand: Loeffler, Gardner, McSally, and Perdue’s careers in the Senate are over, in part because of their subservience to a president who had no business being in office, in part because they sustained it, willingly, by not speaking out against what they knew was wrong. Trump lost anyway after that. They lost too, costing Mitch McConnell his treasured GOP Senate majority. They have a net negative 3 election wins between the four of them. For the rest of their comfortable, miserable lives they can walk around knowing that their public service was a net negative on themselves, their president, their party, and most of all their country. Fucking losers.

Doug Jones is meanwhile considered a leading candidate for Biden’s Attorney General.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

WATCH LIVE: Robber Barons praise their Orange Cash Cow

12 hours ago

Princess Donald cries over his magical ballroom’s disappearance

14 hours ago

Bitch Cassidy and the Sunsetting Career

16 hours ago

White House economic wiener retcons July jobs report

17 hours ago

July jobs report smashes expectations

18 hours ago

Murkowski a no on Todd Blanche

20 hours ago

Orange Fuhrer refuses to endorse John Thune for Senate leader

21 hours ago

Andy Ogles loses primary

22 hours ago

Jon Husted’s wife or someone finally told him to man the fuck up

2 days ago

Fat president still screaming about “fake news” and shit

2 days ago

“How to Lose Friends and Antagonize Presidents” by Thom Tillis

2 days ago

Beaver attacks prompt closure of Maryland state park waterways

2 days ago

Bunnygate scandal continues to engulf Miller campaign

2 days ago

Enraged Fuhrer vows “treasonous” leakers being “hunted down”

2 days ago

Failed casino owner shares business wisdom in Vegas: Live

2 days ago

Jon Husted has no opinion on Max Miller

2 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Todd and K$H’s Excellent Press Conference

3 days ago

Fox News-brained senior citizen actually constitutionally empowered to follow through on his bullshit rants, doesn’t

3 days ago

Patriot arrested outside of Trump’s California golf course

3 days ago

DCCC adds another 12 seats to target list

3 days ago

Chuck Edwards throws in the towel after Ethics finding

3 days ago

Axios “reality checks” Trump’s “golden age”

3 days ago

Abdul El-Sayed wins Michigan Dem Senate nomination

3 days ago

Stuffed toy bunny hostage situation, other matters, unresolved

3 days ago

Minnesota MAGA Congressman hints Tom Emmer possibly dying

3 days ago

Box-o-Wine brought evidence to White House

4 days ago

Max Miller asks House Ethics to investigate him

4 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Trump defense lawyer confirmation hearing

4 days ago

David Ellison bitches about antitrust lawsuits in NYT op-ed

4 days ago

British Neo-Nazi running as Tory in local UK election

4 days ago

Fox News reports Nick Shirley staging dumbassery in Ceuta

4 days ago

“Things aren’t looking good”

4 days ago

Box-o-Wine arrives at White House

4 days ago

Trump considering firing Judge Box-o-Wine over pool case fail

4 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Orange Pharaoh signs some lame executive order

5 days ago

Surprise! Jim Jordan getting in on New Jersey voter fuckup

5 days ago

Frailty, thy name is Donald

5 days ago

NYC-owned grocery stores might require “library card-esque thing” to enter, which is hypocritical because voter ID blah blah blah

5 days ago

Naoero is the new Nauru

5 days ago

Insecure old loser fails to provide his “REAL Polling Numbers”

5 days ago

Newsmax reports near-dead alcoholic agrees with abusive master

5 days ago

UK gas stations losing £194,000/day to theft since Iran war began

5 days ago

CENTCOM internally crowdsourcing ideas to defeat Iran

5 days ago

Missouri station’s “SHOOTING” placeholder not exciting enough

5 days ago

Blanche orders plug pulled on slush fund

5 days ago

Max Miller refuses to resign and/or drop reelection bid

5 days ago

Jim Jordan wrestles with basic consistency: Sunday AM live

6 days ago

Arkansas state House Republican arrested for domestic battery

6 days ago

Mentally ill president “100 percent disagrees” with crazed alcoholic

7 days ago

Houthi missile threat to critical Saudi oil processing hub “could upend Trump’s midterm message”: Politico on what really matters

7 days ago

x
x
x
x
x
x