Categories
Uncategorized

Trump DC Hotel steakhouse waitstaff manual reveals gratingly particulate instructions for serving the fussy Orange God Emperor

Washingtonian obtained a copy of the “Standard Operating Procedure” manual for the BLT Prime restaurant in the Trump International Hotel in DC, and goddamn that man is a child:

“As soon as Trump was seated, the server had to ‘discreetly present’ a mini bottle of Purell hand sanitizer. (This applied long before Covid, mind you.) Next, cue dialogue: ‘Good (time of day) Mr. President. Would you like your Diet Coke with or without ice?’ the server was instructed to recite. A polished tray with chilled bottles and highball glasses was already prepared for either response. Directions for pouring the soda were detailed in a process no fewer than seven steps long – and illustrated with four photo exhibits. The beverage had to be opened in front of the germaphobe commander in chief, ‘never beforehand.’ The server was to hold a longneck-bottle opener by the lower third of the handle in one hand and the Diet Coke, also by the lower third, in the other. Once poured, the drink had to be placed at the President’s right-hand side. ‘Repeat until POTUS departs.'”

“Trump always had the same thing: shrimp cocktail, well-done steak, and fries (plus sometimes apple pie or chocolate cake for dessert). Popovers – make it a double for the President – had to be served within two minutes and the crustaceans ‘immediately.’ The manual instructed the server to open mini glass bottles of Heinz ketchup in front of Trump, taking care to ensure he could hear the seal make the ‘pop’ sound. Garnishes were a no-no. Trump himself never returned a plate, but if he was disappointed, you can bet the complaint would travel down the ranks. Like the time the President questioned why his dining companion had a bigger steak. The restaurant already special-ordered super-sized shrimp just for him and no one else. Next time, they’d better beef up the beef.”

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

FDA recalls male enhancement chocolates

52 minutes ago

Soldier’s wife released as ICE melts under public heat once again

2 hours ago

WATCH LIVE: Karoline Kringefest

3 hours ago

Strait of Hormuz as open as the Kennedy Center

4 hours ago

Fat toddler complains reports are wrong, doesn’t correct them

5 hours ago

“Middle class white kids” most discriminated against in schools: JD

6 hours ago

Regime declares Bondi doesn’t have to be deposed

6 hours ago

Orange Mark got conned into war by two-bit hustler “Bibi”: NYT

7 hours ago

Still sucks to be Florida MAGA Quebecois-American motelier

8 hours ago

WATCH LIVE: Sad Pete

9 hours ago

Dem flips Wisconsin Supreme Court seat

19 hours ago

TACOpocalypse now

22 hours ago

JP Morgan predicts $5/gallon gas this month

1 day ago

Regime pays Deutsche Bank $145 million for $92 million property

1 day ago

Florida woman accidentally rescues wanted murderer from waves

1 day ago

When RonAnon is the Congressional GOP’s moral center…

1 day ago

Vietnam elects communist party swamp creature to presidency

1 day ago

Former reality show host still knows how to hype big new episode

1 day ago

Jaydee crushes it at Orban rally in key EU swing state Hungary

1 day ago

Process (war) crimes

1 day ago

No actual excerpts in Axios infomercial for Haberman/Swan book

1 day ago

Breitbart maintains this is a flex in 2026

1 day ago

“God, you’re hot”: GOP Tennessee school board member to teen girl

1 day ago

IDF hits Iranian petrochemical facility

1 day ago

Things got awkward during Trump call to Artemis crew

2 days ago

Minnesota GOP reps kicked off public safety committee after DWI

2 days ago

Mentally ill president still going: Live video

2 days ago

Top Jaydee ally thinks Pope will coronate Melania as US monarch

2 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Dangerous mental patient allowed to be near children

2 days ago

Oil dips down to $111/barrel after latest false peace hopes

2 days ago

Tech CEOs say people not as abusive to delivery bots as expected

2 days ago

Trump too insane for woman living in fear of French assassins

2 days ago

Fat stupid idiot unfucks Dem side of California gov primary field

2 days ago

Republicans hope “fraud” the new “affordability” with healthcare

3 days ago

Fox News edits out the “Praise be to Allah” part

3 days ago

“Open the Fuckin Strait, you crazy bastards, or you’ll be living in Hell”: Increasingly insane autocrat’s Easter message of non-peace

3 days ago

Second missing US F-15 crew member rescued

4 days ago

Amazon hits marketplace sellers with 3.5 percent fuel surcharge

4 days ago

Orange Ayatollah now almost literally saying “Allahu akbar” online

4 days ago

Maduro autographs Tekashi 6ix9ine’s toy SpongeBob

4 days ago

Fox News locked in on desperate race to find missing pilot

4 days ago

President displays his concern for still-missing downed F-15 pilot

5 days ago

Villager opposed to other Villager’s Trump restroom naming plan

5 days ago

Pentagon chapel kind of officially exiles Catholics on Good Friday

5 days ago

Justice Department lawyer wastes perfectly good picture frame

5 days ago

Rescuers bring back one of two F-15 crew members

5 days ago

WINNING: Multinational company hiring 60,000 in Trump economy

5 days ago

Everything is awesome

5 days ago

ICE arrests Palestine-born leader of Milwaukee Islamic community

5 days ago

Iranians shoot down USAF F-15

5 days ago

x
x
x
x
x
x