The website for “New Wave Shrimp“, which isn’t actually shrimp but a composite of plant products engineered to taste like the crustaceans, states the “product is made from sustainably sourced ingredients with its delicious taste and texture coming from our proprietary blend of seaweed, plant protein and other plant-based ingredients” including “sustainably sourced seaweed” which “gives New Wave Shrimp the texture and bite of shrimp” but then adds “mung bean is the core, clean source of plant protein” whatever the fuck ming bean is, National Zero found Thursday.
This is bullshit. How the hell can it be plant-based “seafood” if there’s barely anything from the sea in it? You might as well be calling Ben and Jerry’s ice cream “seafood” since seaweed-derived carrageenan is an ingredient. Even more disturbing to obsessive pedants is the fact that the brand name calls it “shrimp” without some silly minor deviation in spelling like “chickn”. It’s not friggin shrimp. Shrimp are insect-like animals that live in the ocean until they die of predation by humans or other animals. They’re not seaweed flavored lumps of mung bean or whatever the hell it is.