Categories
Uncategorized

Budweiser goes Willy Wonka, but prize for finding golden can is money instead of tour of their mysterious, magical brewery


There’s a non-zero chance that Anheuser-Busch will end up regretting this. Like it sounds good on paper and companies do packaged instant wins all the time. It very well could end up that the winner finds the golden can while enjoying a Bud Heavy on a weeknight, safely at home watching an NHL or NBA game in a recliner. But what happens when a bunch of hunters somewhere in West Texas are already shitfaced and the one who finds it isn’t the one who actually bought the case? That going to be resolved peaceably when they’re all armed with rifles and crossbows? Is it going to end well if it’s found at a party in a rough neighborhood in Los Angeles or Chicago when people are already drunk and ornery? They better pray they don’t end up accidentally causing a bloodbath.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Comer still dumber than the sow he lost his virginity to in 1989

50 minutes ago

Dem leads Iowa Senate race 47 to 45 percent: poll

2 hours ago

Alan Greenspan’s lifespan is over

3 hours ago

Fox News reports they got her now

4 hours ago

Keir Starmer officially announces resignation

6 hours ago

Heard and McDonald Island’s baby seals clubbed hard by bird flu

13 hours ago

President to sue treasonous criminals

16 hours ago

Mountain Dew marketing team still has their edge

19 hours ago

Baby duckling found dead in National Mall reflecting pool

20 hours ago

Iranians walk out of negotiations after Trump threats

22 hours ago

Fox News reads bellicose comment by deranged, elderly viewer

1 day ago

Fat toddler all but admits he’s ordering “Reflecting Poll” arrests

2 days ago

Texas woman killed when self-driving Tesla plows into home

2 days ago

Regime arresting people for taking National Mall pool paint chips

2 days ago

Orange mental patient doubles down on Italy lie

2 days ago

Newsmax guy pretty butthurt over inconsequential Trump failure

3 days ago

Scientology seizes control of public street

3 days ago

Hegseth minion tells Congress $80 billion needed to cover Iran war

3 days ago

Orange Scumbag slurs his way through some event: Live video

4 days ago

Trump threatens Americans with a good time

4 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Jaydee subs in for Karoline on lying duty, again

4 days ago

Hunter Biden wins big at Supreme Court

4 days ago

Mad Fuhrer issues signature all-caps bunker rant

4 days ago

BREAKING: UFC terror attack plotter a Mexican DACA recipient!!!

4 days ago

Tropical Storm Arthur to dump up to 20 inches of rain on Texas

5 days ago

“Pastors for Trump” founder forsaken by his true God

5 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Orange God Emperor snaps at reporters in France

5 days ago

Jon “Os(jerk!)off” pretty clever for Trump

5 days ago

“Incensed by the dissent”

5 days ago

You can kind of tell why they wanted to hang Mike Pence

6 days ago

Rick Jackson defeats Trump-endorsed scumbag in Georgia gov primary, Trump-endorsed scumbag Collins takes Senate primary

6 days ago

Trump needs Modi to help him climb single step

6 days ago

Regime to allow Iranians to start selling oil immediately

6 days ago

Jaydee x The View kind of sucked for Jaydee

6 days ago

McDonald’s celebrates America250 by reviving fried apple pies

6 days ago

Taxpayers covering at least $300 million of Trump ballroom costs

6 days ago

“Most of that is basically Iranian propaganda”

6 days ago

Muslim Republican leaves Texas GOP convention in tears

6 days ago

“Dumocrats” propagating Trump capitulation

7 days ago

Fanboy says it’s okay to give Iran money because they took a beating

7 days ago

Newsom says he’s under federal grand jury investigation

7 days ago

Strategic Petroleum Reserve at lowest level since 1983

7 days ago

WATCH LIVE: National embarrassment in Europe for a day or two

7 days ago

Top Israeli official gives a big fuck no to Trump “peace deal”

7 days ago

Regime to send pallets of cash to Iran: Jaydee

1 week ago

Orange God Emperor laments his impotence

1 week ago

Jaydee and Stephen pushed hard for Insurrection Act: NYT

1 week ago

MAGA Congresswoman claims “voter fraud” in next reconciliation

1 week ago

Norwegian Prince Joffrey sentenced to four years for rapes

1 week ago

Trump “hereby fully authorizes” Strait of Hormuz reopening

1 week ago

x
x
x
x
x
x