Barrow High School was briefly put on lockdown over reports of student packing heat on campus at 11:00 am Thursday, though it didn’t really matter what time it was because in January it’s pitch black out 24 hours a day there, KTUU reports. No students or teachers were hurt or threatened in the incident in the Arctic coastal town of Utqiagvik (formerly Barrow), Alaska and the student was located by police off-campus shortly thereafter. It’s unclear if the student thought he needed protection from polar bears or if he/she thought the 2007 movie 30 Days of Night – about a horde of vampires that slaughters the entire town – was really going to happen. Or maybe he/she watched John Carpenter’s The Thing too many times, and was worried his/her classmates could be infected.
“I am sure some nerves have been stretched thin but our students and staff have handled themselves very well and the police response was very fast and efficient,” said a Facebook post by either Barrow HS Principal Mark Jenkins or a vicious, hostile alien creature that had assumed the form of Barrow HS Principal Mark Jenkins, pleased that the minor problem had been dealt with.