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Palin swears she’ll be all about Alaska if elected to Congress

A last-minute candidate for an open House seat, Sarah Palin swears she’ll be dedicated to the causes of Alaska if she gets elected, the Associated Press reports.  The failed reality TeeVee performer and half-term governor will be “all about Alaska,” not trying to rebuild her brand.

“I love to work, and anyone who is around me, they know,” Palin said in an interview with AP. “What I’m doing is applying for a job, for Alaskans, saying: ‘Hey, you guys would be my boss. Do you want to hire me? Because if you do, I’ll do a good job for you, and I won’t back down.’”

Still, Palin will definitely not turn down an opportunity to get in front of the cameras–for Alaska, of course.  Given her media contacts, from Day One she’ll be able to “pick up the phone and call any reporter and be on any show if I wanted to, and it would be all about Alaska.”

Four dozen people will be listed on the initial ballot, which will be a mail-in only primary that will undoubtedly have been swayed by bamboo-infected ballots, if Palin loses and doesn’t make it into the top four to go onto a ranked-choice runoff, with the winner serving out the remainder of the term, roughly five month.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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