On Monday fat former President Trump commanded Republican Wisconsin Assembly Speaker Robin Vos to renew the chamber’s contract with the “Special” counsel, fat braces-wearing former state Supreme Court Justice Michael Gableman (pictured above) in a statement: “The Special Counsel appointed by the Wisconsin Assembly to investigate the crimes of the 2020 Election did an outstanding job. He discovered many pieces of evidence that indicate foul play. Anyone calling themselves a Republican in Wisconsin should support the continued investigation in Wisconsin without interference. After all of the evidence the report brought to light, how could anyone want to stop it? I understand some RINOs have primary challengers in Wisconsin. I’m sure their primary opponents would get a huge bump in the polls if these RINOs interfere.”

Among Gableman’s “many pieces of evidence that indicate foul play” include – and this is fucking seriously not satire or embellishment – that a Milwaukee city employee is “probably a Democrat” because she colors her hair, “has a weird nose ring” plays video games, and lives with her boyfriend despite being unmarried. That was among the notes Gableman tried to keep secret from state courts until Vos was held in contempt and the documents were quietly dumped online.

Gableman has repeatedly blown deadlines to issue a final report, thinks the election can be “decertified”, and has been spending quite a lot of his $676,000 budget on out-of-state travel, showing up at Mar-a-Lago this month after visits to Mike Lindell’s bullshit CyberSymposium, and the Cyber Ninjas clusterfuck in Arizona before both utterly failed to prove a “stolen election” last year. Vos hired Gableman in a panic mere hours after Trump erupted in rage at he and other state GOP leaders over their failure to reverse Joe Biden’s 20,000 odd victory in the state in the 2020 election and has gotten nothing but grief for it since. This ought to end well for Cuckin’ Robin.