You MAGA clowns fucking suck. You had us all excited to write some ridiculous fake screed about how First Lady Jill Biden was “just being sarcastic” when she said to a Latino group on Monday that the diversity among Latino Americans makes them “as distinct as the bodegas of the Bronx, as beautiful as the blossoms of Miami and as unique as the breakfast tacos here in San Antonio.”

We were thrilled to do a spiritual sequel to “Was Paul Pelosi’s arrest politically motivated? Yes” and take something legitimately, unambiguously indefensible to make fun of your stupid bullshit again. It would’ve gone on for several paragraphs of increasing cringe with some of your greatest hits extrapolated into a mock defense of Jill Biden. Whatever speechwriter who put it there should be put on the White House janitorial detail for a week for writing something so dumb and cheesy but are you fucking serious? This is offensive? Your party’s leader wanted Border Patrol snipers to shoot Latino migrants in the kneecaps as they approached his giant concrete rampart that never got built but some badly phrased line in a speech nobody cared about otherwise is more racist?

But your cunty hypocrisy and the feigned squeals of affront over this isn’t enough to work with alone. We needed Jill Biden to actually have said something clearly, deeply offensive to make this piece hit the same mark as the Paul Pelosi one did. This is beyond disappointing. You have failed us miserably, MAGA trolls. We’re light years more disgusted with you than we were yesterday.