Categories
Uncategorized

The Orange Pharaoh cannot fail, he can only be failed

Florida state House Rep Anthony Sabatini, a crazy MAGA assclown we’ve covered here probably way more times than we should for any one individual state lawmaker considering there are at least four or five US Senators who have never once been mentioned in a National Zero article, was a little upset on Monday after his Lord and Savior endorsed Cory Mills, the GOP candidate for Florida’s 7th US House District, who defeated Sabatini pretty handily in the August 23rd primary, dealing a serious and perhaps fatal blow to the erstwhile QAnon firebrand Congressman’s career ambitions.

This high sodium tweet is of course situationally different than the other hilariously sad responses from Republicans devastated by the Donald endorsing their primary rivals we’ve covered over this primary season (See Arizona Senate loser Jim Lamon, Wisconsin gov loser Tim Ramthun, Missouri Senate loser Billy Long, etc). For one, Sabatini already lost and Trump’s “endorsement” of Mills here in the general against the Dem is nothing more than an ineffective, no-budget campaign ad.

If we had to guess, Sabatini is still pissed that the Donald stayed out of the primary instead of blessing the soon-to-be-former state lawmaker who had had lobbied heavily for in both word and deed, even while racking up endorsements from MAGA megastars Mike Flynn, Lauren Boebert, and Marjorie Taylor Greene. Being showered with the Orange God Emperor’s golden glory can and has made the difference in a lot of GOP primaries when he decides to come through.

When he doesn’t, the mental contortions and complicated grief playing out in public that result should be preserved for future study on cults. “The Neocon, pro-Ukraine War, obedient-to-Kevin-McCarthy, State Dept friendly wing of the GOP is growing this cycle,” is probably a little closer to admitting outright that Trump is a fucking fraud than most, but it still fits a pattern: They cannot and will not fully reconcile with that truth but instead weakly play it off like some snake spit venom into the ear of their otherwise good and righteous king. He cannot fail, he can only be failed.

And yet in a way it’s actually a far graver insult than they realize. When failed Wisconsin governor candidate Timmy Ramthun reacted to Donald endorsing rival douchebag and eventual primary winner Tim Michels by saying “I heard [former Trump White House Chief of Staff] Reince Priebus was involved,” Ramthun was publicly trying to soothe his wounded ego by shifting the blame to an oily taint-licker at the tip of the spear for an “establishment” arrayed against “authentic” MAGA insurgents like himself. The “no, Trump would never make that decision on his own. Those RINOs and globalists made it for him,” reaction is a natural way to save face, but do they ever stop to think afterward about what it really says about their Orange Messiah?

Trump is supposed to be invincible and infallible to his worshippers. To say that he could be swayed by the petty scheming of mere mortals simply because he endorsed some other asshole is sacrilege. Sabatini and Ramthun and the rest should be deader to MAGA Land than they already are, it’s only because the fanboys are too fucking stupid to realize the truth of their heresy do they still have at least some chance of a future comeback in right wing politics.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Random thoughts Friday, Volume CCI

35 mins ago

Hungarian Nazi enthusiast named to National Security post

1 hour ago

We’re gonna miss him when he’s gone

2 hours ago

Hedge fund manager going to play with a lot more people’s money

3 hours ago

Maine Republican declared winner of election for state seat by one vote after being arrested for choking wife in October

5 hours ago

Canadian Clustertruck captain convicted

6 hours ago

Top German conservative activist dies at 96

7 hours ago

Guy who can’t get webcasts to work interested in buying MSNBC

8 hours ago

Texas Supreme Court gets Ken Paxton out of a jam

10 hours ago

Matt Gaetz says he won’t be back in Congress on January 3rd

11 hours ago

Judge Merchan indefinitely postpones Trump sentencing

12 hours ago

Mike Rogers not under consideration for FBI chief: Trump minion

12 hours ago

MAGA Land urges children to sacrifice new toys for America First

13 hours ago

Tucker says he told Johnson to “check with Putin” on Ukraine aid

14 hours ago

Team Orange “blindsided” by Hegseth rape accusation

15 hours ago

Convicted California pedophile faces 740 years to life in prison

1 day ago

New York man actually laser eye-memes fucking Kevin McCarthy

1 day ago

“He was doing very well but, at the same time, did not want to be a distraction for the Administration”: Trump on Gaetz withdrawal

1 day ago

Matt Gaetz pulls out before things got even more messy

1 day ago

Republicans don’t actually know how mass deportation will work

1 day ago

MAGA propagandists put on nominee defense duty

2 days ago

Barrasso comes out in support of Pete Hegseth

2 days ago

Allegation: Hegseth drugged, sexually assaulted woman

2 days ago

ICC issues arrest warrant for Netanyahu

2 days ago

Bobby Jr agreed that Trump fans are “Nazis” back in 2016

2 days ago

Florida man arrested for planning to bomb Wall Street

2 days ago

Out of control inflation: banana sells for $5 million

2 days ago

House Republicans lining up to sink Gaetz nomination

2 days ago

Not The Onion: Alex Jones sues Sandy Hook families, The Onion

2 days ago

Capitol rioter convicted of plotting to murder FBI agents

2 days ago

House Ethics fails to agree to release Gaetz investigation report

2 days ago

Elon Musk got a lot done today

2 days ago

Orange Pharaoh rages over pushback to his shitty picks

2 days ago

Laken Riley’s killer convicted

2 days ago

Bald asshole former acting AG gets NATO ambassador nod

2 days ago

Grindr user “SenatorPartySlut1776” complies with blackmail terms

3 days ago

Freeman and Moss ask judge to hold Rudy in contempt

3 days ago

Jaydee stuck trying to sell Senate GOP on Gaetz

3 days ago

Surprise! Bobby Jr bought into “plandemic” shit in 2020

3 days ago

Walmart CFO says they’re getting ready to jack up prices

3 days ago

US Embassy in Kyiv shuts down over anticipated Russian attack

3 days ago

AG-designate Gaetz helped pay $10K in tuition for two underprivileged sex workers, Committee investigation found

3 days ago

Wrestling executive to head US Education Department

3 days ago

Guy accused of battery who cheated on wife once wrote of one’s “moral responsibility” while at Ivy League. (No, the other guy)

3 days ago

SpaceX landing aborted with Donald watching

3 days ago

Senate approves RFK takeover

3 days ago

Mehmet Oz to run Medicare and Medicaid for Trump Reich

3 days ago

Deeply unstable woman continues ranting about trans Dem-elect

3 days ago

Fatass demands GOP stop Dems from appointing judges

3 days ago

Manhattan DA won’t let Trump go without a fight

3 days ago

x
x
x
x
x
x