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These people are fucking morons

Kevin McCarthy’s life has been difficult for these last few years. He stood small next to actually effective leaders Nancy Pelosi, Chuck Schumer, and Mitch McConnell. Three legislative titans and a wet paper bag continually soaked with piss by Donald Trump and Marjorie Taylor Greene. At least he had 2023 to look forward to, with polls and forecasts pointing to a solid double-digit working majority for the House GOP. Sure, McCarthy would’ve been as weak as his predecessors John Boehner and Paul Ryan, both of whom quit in disgust after failing to control the criminals and mental patients in the caucus, but for him it would’ve been better than no gavel at all. Then came election night, and it became quickly apparent that the slim GOP House majority, which wasn’t even called until a week afterward, would be a hellish nightmare for the coward.

It’s hard not to be entertained by the serious peril Kevin McCarthy faces right now in his quest to become Speaker, so fraught with uncertainty. He deserves to lose and be laughed out of Congress for his abject prostration to the Orange God Emperor after the January 6th insurrection.

Yet all the same, what do these Freedom Caucasians think is going to happen? Okay, yeah maybe they do have a Speaker candidate who will secure 218 votes – and remember it HAS to be a majority of votes “by name” – there is no plurality election for Speaker of the House. But that’s almost irrelevant because we would have to assume that the new GOP Speaker has acceded to the same insane demands the MAGA assholes have extracted out of McCarthy and still do not support him.

Nobody expects the House GOP to be serious about governing. It was always going to be bullshit sideshow after bullshit sideshow. But how the fuck are they supposed to make even that happen if they can’t even agree on their own leadership? Of course it’s fun seeing a demented little freak like Mark Levin crying about the situation, but he’s not wrong. Not in the least. Everything you think you know about Republicans being in disarray is about to be put on full display Tuesday.

It’ll be one for the ages, and even if McCarthy does wake up as Speaker on Wednesday, he’s very likely going to have a gun pointed at his head every moment for the next two years with that “motion to vacate” threshold in the single digits. Good luck seeing “inflation” get mentioned again.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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