Happy Robert E Lee’s birthday to Alabama! Well officially on the state 2023 calendar it’s listed as “Martin Luther King, Jr and Robert E Lee’s Birthday,” but why the fuck are we going to acknowledge that in the headline if they’re going to make the most important American civil rights leader, a man who was literally killed for his efforts to build a more equitable society, share a day commemorating him with that of a dead traitor who fought to maintain a deeply barbaric and inequitable society?

The calendar also includes “Confederate Memorial Day” on May 4th, “[Confederate President] Jefferson Davis’ Birthday” on June 5th, and “Mrs Rosa L Parks Day” on December 1st, which isn’t an actual state holiday but a day “to commemorate her accomplishments. Each resident of this state is requested to observe the day with appropriate activities,” whatever that means. Sure doesn’t sound like state employees get the day off, unlike on the Confederate holidays.

Also President’s Day on February 20th is not President’s Day in Alabama, but “George Washington and Thomas Jefferson’s Birthday,” apparently as they don’t want to honor Abraham Lincoln because he freed the slaves and all that. It’s stupid because even though the national President’s Day is an observed holiday to honor both Washington and Lincoln’s February birth dates, it doesn’t expressly mean that Lincoln need be honored too. And Thomas Jefferson was born on April 13th, 1743.