Categories
Uncategorized

“You know that joke when a guy plays a prank pretending to be a corpse and then moving? It ain’t funny,” Iowa mortician says

This Weekend at Bernie’s preboot is horrific.  An Iowa mortician found a live 66-year-old woman gasping for air inside a body bag sent to his funeral home by a nearby Alzheimer’s care facility last month, costing the company a $10,000 fine and confirming the adage that it never hurts to check one more time.

According to NBC News, the woman was admitted to hospice at the Glen Oaks Alzheimer’s Special Care Center in Urbandale December 28th suffering from “senile degeneration of the brain.”  During early morning rounds on January 3rd, a nurse checked the unnamed patient and found no signs of response, with the woman lying in bed, eyes open and pupils fixed.  The nurse saw no signs of breathing and could not locate a pulse or a heartbeat using a stethoscope.  Believing the patient to be dead, the nurse contacted her supervisor and the patient’s designated family member.

But there was a problem.  She wasn’t dead yet.  The mortician on call put the patient in a cloth body bag on a gurney around 8 a.m. and observed no signs of life.  After around five minutes to exit the facility, a ten-minute drive to the funeral home, and form processing for around five minutes, the staff of the funeral home opened the bag to find the woman gasping for air.  EMTs called to the scene found the woman breathing but unresponsive.  She was taken to a local hospital where she was treated and released back to the hospice facility, where she died with her family–who undoubtedly now know more lawyers than at any other time in their lives–by her side.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Nothing stopping Trump from renaming Strait of Hormuz for himself

37 minutes ago

US Mint selling $1 Trump coins for $2.44 each

2 hours ago

Comer too stupid to be trolling here

3 hours ago

Apple Maps renames Lake Ontario before Trump minions do

19 hours ago

Orange Fuhrer says Iran will be so defeated this time

23 hours ago

Scalise hypes constitutional amendment to cap Supreme Court

1 day ago

Lake America approval rate at 14 percent: Reuters/Ipsos poll

1 day ago

Senescent old men talk about what’s wrong with Hollywood

2 days ago

Army Secretary Dan Driscoll quits

2 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Maybe he dies on camera finally

2 days ago

Kalshi fines, bans House GOP candidate for betting on her own bid

2 days ago

Change some of the nouns around on this Trump post

2 days ago

North Koreans don’t give a shit what Trump does

2 days ago

Maybe if they weren’t so focused on the reflecting pool…

3 days ago

More stuff goes kaboom in Iran

3 days ago

Great Leader promises state crackdown on subversive polling

3 days ago

MAGA Congresswoman admits voters’ “Trump fatigue” real

3 days ago

“There’s not really a point in passing this after the election”: House Republican staffer on bill to lower Americans’ electricity costs

4 days ago

Milo Yiannopoulos already deported to UK

4 days ago

Trump not mad at all about NYT story on his 9/11 schedule

5 days ago

Loomer takes credit for Milo Yiannopoulos’s ICE arrest

5 days ago

Astronauts wait awkwardly for inconsiderate orange asshole: Live

5 days ago

President announces sweeping new policy gesture to help famers

5 days ago

Officials fear secondary Himalayan flash flood

5 days ago

North Carolina “election integrity” bullshit iced over GOP failures

6 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Orange Fuhrer “officially” renames Lake Ontario, lol

6 days ago

Texas DOC releases fugtive ICE agent

6 days ago

Wow, 100 million illegals is big if true

6 days ago

Orange Demagogue keeping up the Abbey Gate act

7 days ago

Talarico seeks to unseal Paxton depositions

7 days ago

Trump teaches Canada a lesson with Lake Ontario renaming

1 week ago

Tourists among hundreds missing in deadly Nepal/Tibet flash flood

1 week ago

Breitbart genders police officers, implies factor in outcome

1 week ago

Darline Graham wins South Carolina GOP Senate primary

1 week ago

Dolly Parton has died

1 week ago

“Iran raised your gas prices” now a GOP campaign slogan

1 week ago

Regime considering demolishing Kennedy Center

1 week ago

RFK Jr notches major win: Two dead of measles in Pennsylvania

1 week ago

RNC goes to the mat to fight hard for health insurance companies

1 week ago

“Serious consideration”

1 week ago

Raging Reno, Nevada wildfire finally easing

1 week ago

Jesse Watters struggles against noncompliant interview subject

1 week ago

Supreme Court allows Trump crackdown on mail-in voting

1 week ago

Orange Baby threatens Canada some more

1 week ago

Wait for the punchline

1 week ago

Comer marvels at investigative target’s ability to evade his scrutiny

1 week ago

California AG cancels settlement talks meeting with Paramount

1 week ago

“IRAN IS COMPLETELY COLLAPSING!!!”

1 week ago

John Solomon reports other guys high on hopium

1 week ago

CBP arrests USS Abraham Lincoln sailor’s dad

1 week ago

x
x
x
x
x
x