Realizing that he’s too weak and incompetent to work his way up the pyramid by impeaching Secretary of Homeland Security Alex Mayorkas, Attorney General Merrick Garland, FBI Director Chris Wray, Secretary of State Tony Blinken, or other MAGA public enemies first, titular Speaker of the House Kevin McCarthy has concluded his safest bet to please his Orange God Emperor and his cult of fanatic extremists in the Republican caucus is to simply move forward with trying to impeach President Joe Biden as soon as realistically possible, CNN reports on more House GOP impotence.
It’s still easier said than done for the cowardly figurehead as a number of “moderate” Republicans in swing districts do not want anything to do with such an effort at least as the completely made-up case against Biden currently stands. “The Watergate profile is what we should benchmark off of, not the Pelosi method of putting it on the floor without a single committee hearing. Pelosi watered down and lowered the threshold for impeachment, and we should not follow her example. It’s not good for the country,” said Nebraska Congressman Don Bacon, a Biden-district frontliner who may or may not actually be principled here. New York Congressman Mike Lawler wouldn’t even answer a question from CNN about it. Worse, Freedom Caucasian Ken Buck is reportedly deeply skeptical and, as a member of the House Judiciary Committee, he could present a serious roadblock to getting any articles of impeachment out of the Judiciary Committee and onto the full House floor.
Now it’s plain that this is a desperate rearguard action by MAGA Republicans who know full well that they’ll never get any meaningful numbers of swing voters to switch from Team Brandon to Team Orange. So what they’re doing now is trying to make it seem like Biden is just as corrupt and malevolent as Trump in the hope that enough independents will just say “Fuck it, they’re both evil” and stay home on election day. Trump fanboys sure as shit aren’t going to sit out 2024 when the fat fuck’s been hit with as many as 100 felony counts in four jurisdictions by then, so the “addition by subtraction” play makes sense. Though it’s not like the GOP are really capable of trying anything else such as actual accomplishments or even just positive messaging in their campaign ads.
It’s bad enough for McCarthy if these would-be Republican holdouts to an impeachment don’t understand that all this tedious, stupid bullshit from every new storyline in the Hunter Biden Cinematic Universe is the best they can do to help return Trump to power, but that’s not an insurmountable problem if enough momentum can be built against Joe. Considerably worse however would be if they do in fact understand it fully and have no desire to see the Orange Messiah be resurrected politically. It’s also not hard at all to imagine that at least some of Kev’s new interest in taking on Biden was the result of yet another hastily-made commitment to Donald.
Like the loser gambler on his knees with the bookie’s gun at his forehead, swearing on his life that if he can just have another week he’ll throw in another $10,000 on top of the $50,000 he owes, McCarthy almost certainly increased his debt to the Orange Warlord in a conversation that went something like “Yes sir, please. Look I know I promised we would expunge your impeachments but I can’t get the votes, so how about we impeach Biden instead to even the score?”