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Paxton trial update: Lawyer says media making him look too tan

Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton’s defense lawyer Tony Buzbee on Thursday complained in Instagram post that “the media” was making him look too “tan” in video and still images of the ongoing trial in which his client faces expulsion from office over his eight year political crime spree.

“Here are two pics from two different reputable news organizations, taken on the same day, within minutes of the other. I am out in the sun a lot, but I don’t think my skin has ever been that ‘tan.’ Why would they doctor my pic? I’m sure you could take a guess. So you think the news isn’t bias? Think again,” wrote Buzbee, evoking the complaints of another certain Ken Paxton ally who’s also supposed to have more important things to do than constantly obsesses over his appearance.

Texas Tribune reporter Robert Downen notes that the more orange-y image on the left is actually from the official livestream of the Texas state Senate, which doesn’t exactly qualify as a “news organization” (nor is it “reputable,” especially if they fail to convict this piece of shit). We would also add that irrespective of how much a broadcast feed or camera might oversaturate an image, Tony Buzbee looks like a douchey 1990s-era movie villain with his stupid slicked-back hairstyle and angry scowl. He’s just asking for Bruce Willis or Jean-Claude Van Damme to kick him out of an upper-floor window of a burning skyscraper and say “Buzz off, Buzbee!” or something just before the credits roll.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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