National Zero’s crack internet reporting team have been unable to find any reports of rainbow fentanyl or any other lethal drugs killing trick-or-treaters surfacing in the 36 hours since the end of Halloween 2023, not even a news story about parents merely finding colorful, fruit-flavored narcotics in candy upon diligently checking their children’s plastic jack-o-lantern buckets.
So for the moment it appears this is now the second year in a row in which no children overdosed on powerful synthetic opioids distributed freely by drug dealers. In contrast to last year however, there were no frenzied warnings in the right wing media about the coming spooky-themed apocalypse.
“I am just glad the awareness of this candy fentanyl appears to have prevented deaths,” wrote one MAGA Disqus user on a November 2, 2022 Mediaite article titled “ZERO! That’s How Many Kids Reportedly Got ‘Rainbow Fentanyl’ in Trick-or-Treat Candy After Media Fear Mongering.” Click on the link to ask the asshole why there were also no deaths this year when there was no “awareness.”