Well you know what they say: You win some, you lose some but then go on Fox News to say how unfair it is that you lost and complain about all the libs laughing at your client who deserves more respect as “a husband, a father, and a grandfather” even though this whole thing started because he banged a pornstar and a Playboy model after his third wife had given birth to their son who’s just a little older than his grandchildren because you’re so goddamned humiliated and pissed off after the jury nailed the fat fuck on all 34 counts and everything sucks so freaking badly…

We’ll hazard that Todd Blanche would rather be smashing Jesse Watters in the face with a piece of rebar than answering his stupid questions right now but given that newly convicted felon former President Trump could begin publicly attacking him for the failure this bit is probably necessary to allay the Orange God Emperor’s anger and save his law practice from certain doom.

Blanche must’ve mentally impaled Watters’s face with the rebar when he asked “Would you have done anything differently? Is there a witness you thought you should’ve called?” and Blanche, wanting to avoid further antagonizing his scumbag client, said he wouldn’t have changed anything, even though it’s obvious Trump made him do all sorts of stupid shit that pissed off the jury.

BONUS: Here’s JD Vance saying Republicans have to subpoena Merchan and his daughter.

Easy to imagine some of the slightly smarter Fox News viewers being like “Well what the fuck are they waiting for?” considering that maybe they should’ve done it before Trump was convicted.