“Walmart is just upset that they can’t stock cheap products that don’t last very long and we have no idea of how they would be rolled out. Perhaps, just perhaps we all would think about unnecessary purchases if low-priced things were more expensive. I believe he will start with Autos and Electronics. Toys, other stuff later. But a question, exactly how many toys does a child need? Answer = None! Needs are different from Wants” – Top comment on the Fox Business News article “Walmart warns of higher prices if Trump implements proposed tariffs,” posted Thursday.

Where to start with this one. First off, “how many toys does a child need?” is mostly the wrong stupid rhetorical question here. It’s how many toys does a parent need to make sure their little bundle of joy isn’t spending a rainy day microwaving a can of soda or dumping a box of rusty nails they found in the garage down the toilet just to see what happens. It depends on the kid, but it isn’t zero for any of them. Also, babies and toddlers absolutely do need to be supplied with interactive toys for their growth. A box of rusty nails isn’t going to help them develop their spatial acuity.

Then again it’s obvious this dipshit commenter isn’t so concerned with what children can or should do without so much as he’s simply wishcasting that Americans will simply soldier on and happily cut back on spending on discretionary-ish items if it means that convicted felon President-Elect Trump’s agenda isn’t threatened by voter outrage over their “wants” unnecessarily becoming more expensive at Donald’s whims. That it’s probably a safe bet that three weeks ago this same asshole was screaming about how bacon costs $2.00 more than it did in 2019 is also beside the point.

It’s that, when the shoe was on the other foot for Dems, the comments never got any more dismissive than “If the economy’s in the shitter like you say it is then why are you spending $99 for fucking NFTs of Trump dressed like an astronaut?” If anything, the argument from your average Dem voter was some version of “Yes, it sucks eggs are more expensive now, but Trump’s saying he’s going to impose these draconian tariffs on foreign goods. So you should vote for Kamala Harris if you don’t like inflation,” without any defensive justification and “buck up, you whiner”-type derision.

We had anticipated a similar line of bullshit excuses from the fanboys earlier this week when the same story about the Walmart CFO’s warnings had first dropped. What we hadn’t expected was for them to start workshopping them two months before their Orange Messiah even takes office again.