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Foreign language to be given official status by executive order

The globalist regime currently driving America into the ground plans to issue an official edict declaring a foreign language the “official” one of the United States, CBS’s Weijia Jiang reports.

“English,” which did not originate in America but instead in a distant land during an era in which men wore frilly stockings everywhere they went and had really gay-looking facial hair too, will be enshrined as the official language here by President Donald Trump’s executive fiat as soon as Friday.

To shift the satirical tone here, the question now raised is why the fuck he won’t just declare the language is now to be called “American” on the basis that the United States has more native English speakers than any other one country, as well as simply stealing credit from the British. It’s not MAGA enough simply to proclaim it the official language which, to completely do away with the satirical tone, this order means fuck all and sure as shit won’t make eggs cheaper or lower credit card rates.

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