Categories
Uncategorized

TSA intercepts turtle sex trafficker at Newark airport checkpoint

“A Pennsylvania man was caught with a turtle concealed in his pants when the Transportation Security Administration body scanner triggered an alarm in the area of the man’s groin on Friday, March 7, at Newark Liberty International Airport. A TSA officer administered a pat-down of the area of the man’s body where the alarm was triggered and in doing so, determined that there was something concealed in the area of the man’s groin. When asked if there was something hidden in his pants, the man, a resident of East Stroudsburg, Pa, reached down the front of his pants and pulled out a live turtle that was wrapped in a small blue towel. The turtle was estimated to be about 5-inches in length. The man told officials that it was a red-ear slider turtle. Port Authority Police questioned the man, took possession of the turtle and indicated that they would contact the US Fish and Wildlife Service and local animal control officials. The man missed his flight and was escorted out of the checkpoint by police,” says a TSA press release.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Failed casino owner shares business wisdom in Vegas: Live

2 hours ago

Jon Husted has no opinion on Max Miller

4 hours ago

WATCH LIVE: Todd and K$H’s Excellent Press Conference

7 hours ago

Fox News-brained senior citizen actually constitutionally empowered to follow through on his bullshit rants, doesn’t

9 hours ago

Patriot arrested outside of Trump’s California golf course

10 hours ago

DCCC adds another 12 seats to target list

12 hours ago

Chuck Edwards throws in the towel after Ethics finding

13 hours ago

Axios “reality checks” Trump’s “golden age”

13 hours ago

Abdul El-Sayed wins Michigan Dem Senate nomination

22 hours ago

Stuffed toy bunny hostage situation, other matters, unresolved

1 day ago

Minnesota MAGA Congressman hints Tom Emmer possibly dying

1 day ago

Box-o-Wine brought evidence to White House

1 day ago

Max Miller asks House Ethics to investigate him

1 day ago

WATCH LIVE: Trump defense lawyer confirmation hearing

1 day ago

David Ellison bitches about antitrust lawsuits in NYT op-ed

1 day ago

British Neo-Nazi running as Tory in local UK election

1 day ago

Fox News reports Nick Shirley staging dumbassery in Ceuta

2 days ago

“Things aren’t looking good”

2 days ago

Box-o-Wine arrives at White House

2 days ago

Trump considering firing Judge Box-o-Wine over pool case fail

2 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Orange Pharaoh signs some lame executive order

2 days ago

Surprise! Jim Jordan getting in on New Jersey voter fuckup

2 days ago

Frailty, thy name is Donald

2 days ago

NYC-owned grocery stores might require “library card-esque thing” to enter, which is hypocritical because voter ID blah blah blah

2 days ago

Naoero is the new Nauru

2 days ago

Insecure old loser fails to provide his “REAL Polling Numbers”

2 days ago

Newsmax reports near-dead alcoholic agrees with abusive master

2 days ago

UK gas stations losing £194,000/day to theft since Iran war began

2 days ago

CENTCOM internally crowdsourcing ideas to defeat Iran

3 days ago

Missouri station’s “SHOOTING” placeholder not exciting enough

3 days ago

Blanche orders plug pulled on slush fund

3 days ago

Max Miller refuses to resign and/or drop reelection bid

3 days ago

Jim Jordan wrestles with basic consistency: Sunday AM live

3 days ago

Arkansas state House Republican arrested for domestic battery

3 days ago

Mentally ill president “100 percent disagrees” with crazed alcoholic

4 days ago

Houthi missile threat to critical Saudi oil processing hub “could upend Trump’s midterm message”: Politico on what really matters

4 days ago

Not-Movie Night Friday: The Shadow Over Innsmouth audiobook

5 days ago

Regime admits former Olympian didn’t damage Reflecting Pool

5 days ago

Surprise! President Blood and Soil thrilled by Ceuta rush

5 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Cabinet members deservingly suffer bleak meeting

5 days ago

Floridians advised to prevent leprosy by avoiding wild armadillos

5 days ago

Bernie Moreno taking familial frustrations out on Anthony Fauci

5 days ago

Spanish North African enclave overrun by 60,000 migrants

5 days ago

Orange Baby whines over his betrayal carrying consequences

5 days ago

Jim Jordan wrestles with very simple, easy tests of moral character

6 days ago

Talarico 51 – Picasso Face 48 in Texas: Fox News poll

6 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Creepy grampa has ideas about trucks

6 days ago

Orange Dictator really, really wants immunity from IRS audits

6 days ago

Now it’s “you can’t go to the Obama museum without a photo ID”

6 days ago

Regime gutting counterterrorism capabilities

6 days ago

x
x
x
x
x
x