Schumer book tour postponed

Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer will not be signing copies of his new book this week for fans of his style of governance given that they may not exist. Plus there’s some “security concerns,” per a statement from Schumer’s team picked up by the New York Times’s Annie Karni.

Fat bastard acts like April 2nd is Bastille Day

Luna non-denies story about Trump offering her his bed

Minnesota Republicans want “TDS” recognized as mental illness

Victim wonders what he ever did to deserve all this hate

Navajo code talkers erased from military websites

Violent situation at remote Antarctic base probably of Earthly origin

WATCH LIVE: Karoline Karnage at the White House

February retail sales data misses expectations

Houthi fuck do they think they are? No one challenges the narrative

Fanboy can hardly contain his erection for Tom Homan

No shit, Sherlock

Schumer book tour postponed

Certainty qualified with uncertainty

Reich claims expelled Lebanese doctor a Hezbollah sympathizer

Fox News reports “self-described veteran” kicked out of town hall

Orange Tyrant claims Biden pardons null and void

Team Orange defied judge’s order on deportation flights

President Trump responds to deadly tornadoes and wildfires

Wisconsin Trump voter notices increased immigration enforcement

Suck it up, you puny fucking nobodies of the US electorate

Orange in the red on the economy for the first time ever in NBC poll

Movie Night Saturday: World War Z

Kremlin asset denies boss was such a dick to errand boy

MAGA Land skeptical of a stupid conspiracy theory for a change

Reich stormtroopers hid Canadian detainee from media

Cybertruck deliveries halted

Mohammed Bonesaw’s plan to build twin 1,600 ft tall, 106 mile-wide skyscrapers across vast, hostile desert running into difficulties

WATCH LIVE: Orange Warlord addresses Justice Department

South Carolina man sues Nancy Mace over sex trafficking speech

“Next question”

MAGA Congresskaren thinks Dems conspiring with auto CEOs

DOGE-eat-dog world

Mount Spurr getting closer to hot, steamy, satisfying release

Bondi vows to protect all Teslas regardless of color or model

Consumer sentiment continues tanking, even among Republicans

“Medicaid isn’t just for Black people in the ghetto, these are our voters”: Trump minion after Elon Musk interview clusterfuck

Lutnick tells Fox viewers everything will be fine by Q4 2025

Michigan focus grouper fears US will “turn into a dictatorship”

Justin Trudeau officially resigns, Mark Carney to be sworn in

Most Brits don’t have particularly strong feelings about aliens: poll

New York Post reports pirate lord seizing control of forlorn island

S&P 500’s “correction” seventh-fastest ever

Second Amendment patriot celebrates freedom at Tesla dealership

MAGA Congressman didn’t want to hold town hall

Mike Johnson’s prayers answered again as God takes another Dem

Newsmax asshole’s explanation for why stock market crash actually Biden and Dems’ fault way too long, boring, and convoluted

President Shitbag takes birthright case to Los Supremos

Voters think economy even worse now than under Biden: QU poll

“This is what open borders potentially can bring you”

Pro-Palestinian Jews occupy Trump Tower in Manhattan