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“Human remains found near Taylor Swift’s beachside mansion”

Linking to a story by Providence, Rhode Island NBC affiliate WJAR headlined “Human remains found in Westerly,” Fox News added some of their signature creamy, sugary, cholesterol-laden industrial-lard byproduct frosting to the recipe called for in the original article Thursday, titling it “Human remains found near Taylor Swift’s beachside Rhode Island mansion amid serial killer fears.”

“Taylor Swift? SERIAL KILLER? Oh fuck yeah, I’m reading this!” Google’s algorithm may or may not have said as soon as it crawled the headline. “Pffft, fuck that boring-ass WJAR article. LMAO the cops said ‘No foul play is suspected’ in the original article and then Fox News leaves that out, lol.”

“OMG there’s definitely some amateur ‘sleuth’ podcaster out there with like 35 listeners who just added a little pin to their map of New England as they ‘piece together all the clues’ in their hunt for the serial killer just because they saw this Fox News headline,” the algorithm added, probably.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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