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Billy Joel cancels all concerts through July 2026

OH NO! Billy Joel has a BRAIN DISORDER and can’t perform! Seriously! Billboard reports Billy, a famous musician loved everywhere on Long Island – even those who live in houses that got in the way of his car – has “normal pressure hydrocephalus,” which means there’s spinal fluid leaking into his brain or some horrible shit. So now every Billy Joel concert is canceled until at least July 2026.

Total bummer about the people who wanted to hear him sing about all the events in American history from 1960 through 1990 and then another one about the days when they all used to hang out at the village green, wearing engineer boots, leather jackets, and tight blue jeans and then when you put a nickel in jukebox you hear a song about New Orleans. And then Brenda and Eddie…

Man, what a great story about them. Sheesh. Guess fans will have to just listen on Spotify at home.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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