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Russian economic minister warns country on brink of recession

Speaking at the St Petersburg International Economic Forum on Thursday, Russian Economy Minister Maxim Reshetnikov warned the crowd that “the numbers indicate cooling, but all our numbers are (like) a rearview mirror. Judging by the way businesses currently feel and the indicators, we are already, it seems to me, on the brink of going into a recession,” the Associated Press reports.

Sounds like Reshetnikov is about on the brink of a windowsill in a tall building! Ba-dum tiss! Seriously folks, it was probably good news because a recession might just be a big upgrade from whatever you call Russia’s economy now! Ba-dum tiss! Was just talking to a Russian friend on Facetime and was telling him “Ivan, congrats on the new Yugo you bought for the missus but it looks like the dealer charged you an arm and a leg for that thing!” and Ivan says “Nyet nyet. The arm was amputated because infection from dirty krokodil needle and leg gone from Ukrainian landmine. Car very sensible purchase.” Ba-dum tiss! Any Russians in the audience here…? Russians are great…

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