Sources tell CBS News Republican Iowa Senator Joni Ernst has decided that her sage wisdom of “we’re all going to die someday” applies to her political career as well, as is self-terminating by not running for reelection in 2026. Ernst is expected to make the announcement next week.

The Trump Regime had hoped Ernst, first elected in 2014, would run for a third term. Nothing in CBS’s article points to a material reason for her dropping out, all it says is “Ernst has told people close to her that she intended to serve only two terms, she has accomplished what she set out to do, and intends to head to the private sector, one of the sources said.” Fair enough for CBS to carry that water in exchange for the scoop. But that’s some weak-ass spin considering that on one end she possibly kind of got blackmailed into voting to confirm Petey Pee Pants as Defense Secretary by MAGA agents who knew she was effing a legendary sex machine Air Force officer assigned to lobby for the branch on Capitol Hill. Then on the other there was the “we’re all going to die someday” free ad material for a Dem challenger. Plus who the hell knows what other reasons she hates this job.

Anyway fuck her and the breadbags she rode in on. Tommy Tuberville and Marsha Blackburn don’t have integrity because their stupid hick brains are incapable of perceiving what integrity is. There is no selling out for them because they were bought long ago. Ernst isn’t dumb, she had some tiny remnants of a soul, and nevertheless she gave that away just to make it from one month to the next.