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Nestle CEO canned for being too sweet on employee

Nestle CEO Laurent Freixe has been abruptly fired just under a year at the helm of the candy giant for being too sweet on an unnamed employee, CNBC reports without any sexual/sugar innuendos.

“This was a necessary decision. Nestle’s values and governance are strong foundations of our company. I thank Laurent for his years of service. We are not changing course on strategy and we will not lose pace on performance,” said Chairman Paul Bulcke in a statement. “A CEO who fucks around with employees will not stop us from developing the Everlasting Gobstopper, the wonder candy that never, ever, ever loses flavor no matter how much you suck on it,” Bulcke did not add.

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