A Kissimmee, Florida Trump fan is facing five years in prison on a single count of transmitting a threat to kill in interstate commerce after he lost patience with an automated phone bot at US Customs and Immigration Services while trying to get papers for his Colombian fiancee, telling the bot he’d torch the White House and kill ICE agents, the Independent reports, with copious detail on the man’s support for the regime’s extremist immigration policy. When it’s directed at other people.

Per the affidavit, self-employed BMW repair specialist Tristen Elijah Giroux, 30, commanded the bot to transfer him “to a customer service representative. Stupid bitch… Transfer me to a representative, dumb cunt bitch,” during the October 24th call, the total wait time of which was not disclosed.

Failing to have his inquiry escalated to a live person, Giroux then escalated his outburst on the recorded line with “I’m gonna burn down the White House. I’m gonna go choke out every ICE member I see. Kill them all.” Big Brother was listening and FBI agents showed up to arrest Giroux the very next day. The registered Republican voter confessed immediately, but offered that he was really on their side because he was “disgusted” by anti-ICE protests he had seen on TikTok. At the same time he’d been enraged over the process to bring his fiancee in from Colombia – which was already Kafkaesque a year ago before Giroux’s Orange Fuhrer and Goebbels reincarnate Stephen Miller returned to power and deliberately bricked it. Just like Giroux had voted for them to do.

And that’s not an extrapolation. He almost literally told the FBI agents that. “Giroux explained that he is trying to handle the immigration of his paramour in the right way, and it is so difficult, while in the meantime, people are entering the county illegally,” said the affidavit, emphasis added on the kind of horseshit low-info Latino Americans and others who have family and loved ones who have dealt with the decrepit system (or have been dealt with by it) told themselves and each other when justifying their assent to returning a cruel tyrant to power. The reality is that unless you have money and a lot of it, if you were born outside of this country’s borders, you are less than nothing to this regime, not even if you poured so much blood, sweat, and tears into building a fast food monument to his glory.

You voted to spare Trump from dying in prison, now fuck you if you think he cares about “the right way.” Actually fuck you AND here’s a five year federal prison sentence for the sin of angrily venting to an automated phone bot you didn’t think was listening to your graphic terroristic threats.

Guess you can say that was one way of getting connected to “a live agent.” HEYOOOOOOOOO!