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Fuhrer punishes European allies for defending Greenland from his mental instability, says he’s suing JP Morgan Chase in two weeks

Convicted felon President Trump on Saturday posted a 400+ word scream at Western Europe for failing to submit to his unstoppable iron determination to acquire Greenland for his empire:

“We have subsidized Denmark, and all of the Countries of the European Union, and others, for many years by not charging them Tariffs, or any other forms of remuneration. Now, after Centuries, it is time for Denmark to give back – World Peace is at stake! China and Russia want Greenland, and there is not a thing that Denmark can do about it. They currently have two dogsleds as protection, one added recently. Only the United States of America, under PRESIDENT DONALD J TRUMP, can play in this game, and very successfully, at that! Nobody will touch this sacred piece of Land, especially since the National Security of the United States, and the World at large, is at stake. On top of everything else, Denmark, Norway, Sweden, France, Germany, The United Kingdom, The Netherlands, and Finland have journeyed to Greenland, for purposes unknown. This is a very dangerous situation for the Safety, Security, and Survival of our Planet. These Countries, who are playing this very dangerous game, have put a level of risk in play that is not tenable or sustainable.”

“Therefore, it is imperative that, in order to protect Global Peace and Security, strong measures be taken so that this potentially perilous situation end quickly, and without question. Starting on February 1st, 2026, all of the above mentioned Countries (Denmark, Norway, Sweden, France, Germany, The United Kingdom, The Netherlands, and Finland), will be charged a 10 percent Tariff on any and all goods sent to the United States of America. On June 1st, 2026, the Tariff will be increased to 25 percent. This Tariff will be due and payable until such time as a Deal is reached for the Complete and Total purchase of Greenland. The United States has been trying to do this transaction for over 150 years. Many Presidents have tried, and for good reason, but Denmark has always refused. Now, because of The Golden Dome, and Modern Day Weapons Systems, both Offensive and Defensive, the need to ACQUIRE is especially important. Hundreds of Billions of Dollars are currently being spent on Security Programs having to do with ‘The Dome,’ including for the possible protection of Canada, and this very brilliant, but highly complex system can only work at its maximum potential and efficiency, because of angles, metes, and bounds, if this Land is included in it. The United States of America is immediately open to negotiation with Denmark and/or any of these Countries that have put so much at risk, despite all that we have done for them, including maximum protection, over so many decades. Thank you for your attention to this matter!”

Wonder where he got “angles, metes, and bounds” from.

The post followed another one with a (likely) emptier threat: “A front page Article in The Fake News Wall Street Journal states, without any verification, that I offered Jamie Dimon, of JPMorgan Chase, the job of Fed Chairman. This statement is totally untrue, there was never such an offer and, in fact, I’ll be suing JPMorgan Chase over the next two weeks for incorrectly and inappropriately DEBANKING me after the January 6th Protest, a protest that turned out to be correct for those doing the protesting — The Election was RIGGED!” and just gotta stop him there as it this might be Trump’s least varnished justification for the Capitol insurrection since January 6th, 2021 itself.

“Why wouldn’t The Wall Street Journal call me to ask whether or not such an offer was made? I would have very quickly told them, ‘NO,’ and that would have been the end of the story. Also, one was led to believe that I offered Jamie Dimon the job of Secretary of the Treasury, but that would be one that he would be very interested in. The problem is, I have Scott Bessent doing a fantastic job, A SUPERSTAR — Why would I give it to Jamie? No such offer was made there, or even thought of, either. The Wall Street Journal ought to do better ‘fact checking,’ or its already strained credibility will continue to DIVE. Thank you for your attention to this matter!” the fat fuck continued.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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