You were all on the edge of your seats for centuries over what the fuck exactly happened to the skeleton of Charles de Batz de Castelmore d’Artagnan – aka the Fourth Musketeer – and now the BBC reports that researchers are oh so tantalizingly close to nailing down that the bones under the altar of St Peter and Paul Church in Maastricht are indeed D’Artagnan’s. The French adventurer is believed to have been killed during the 1673 siege of the city, possibly by some lowly peasant piker.
“I’m a scientist, but my expectations are high,” Wim Dijkman told local public broadcaster Omroep Limburg about the discovery, adding that it’s just a matter of DNA testing confirming his priors. “I’ve already been researching d’Artagnan’s grave for 28 years. This could be the highlight of my career.”