“A physician is behind bars in Walton County after a Grand Jury indictment connected to the operating room death of an Alabama man. The Office of the State Attorney for the First Judicial Circuit announced that a Walton County Grand Jury has returned an indictment charging Dr Thomas Shaknovsky with second-degree manslaughter in the August 2024 death of a 70‑year‑old man from Muscle Shoals, Alabama,” says a Monday press release from the Walton County Sheriff’s Office.

“The indictment follows an extensive investigation conducted by the WSCO in coordination with the Office of the State Attorney 1st Judicial Circuit and additional state and medical authorities. On August 21, 2024, during what was scheduled to be a laparoscopic splenectomy, Shaknovsky removed the victim’s liver instead of his spleen, resulting in catastrophic blood loss and the patient’s death on the operating table. The Grand Jury found probable cause to charge that the actions taken in the operating room constituted criminal conduct under Florida law,” the press release continued.

The last part’s a nice touch, as if to say “Hey you know everything else about our state is a never-ending national embarrassment but a doctor incapable of remembering Anatomy 101 from his freshman year of college and couldn’t be bothered to dust off a fucking textbook to simply triple check that he had the right organ before going ahead and removing the wrong one is still a criminal under our statutes. We can say that about ourselves and proudly so before we elect a complete assclown felon from the Bronx like Byron Donalds to govern us for the next eight years.”