Verbatim from the first few sentences of The Independent’s Tuesday report about a British gas station owner suffering £2,000 in thefts since convicted felon President Trump attacked Iran:

“‘If someone steals £100 worth of fuel from us, that is £100 out of my profit for the day,’ Goran Raven said. ‘It’s absolutely a straight loss for us.’ Speaking from his Shell garage in Romford, east London, Mr Raven said he’s lost around £2,000 to fuel theft since the war between Iran and the US broke out on 28 February. Higher pump prices in the wake of the Iran war have meant his fourth-generation family-run business has suffered a significant blow as more people take off without paying.”

Emphasis added on the last part, because, well… British gas stations don’t require you to pay first before you pump? Sure, there’s plenty to be said here about the needless privations inflicted upon people in a country completely removed from the destructive hubris of that fat, saggy orange fuck and the Israeli tyrant that suckered him into the attack on Iran, the reminder that even if a retail establishment bears the logo of a large multinational corporation oftentimes it’s owned and operated by a person in your community who feels it more than Walmart does when you treat yourself to a pack of AA-batteries at the self-checkout as recompense for greedflation, and so on in this story.

There’s a lot else to be said here and yet, what the fuck? What gas pumps in the US can be activated by means other than (A) from the control panel operated by the cashier after you hand them $50 and tell them the pump number or (B) by swiping your credit/debit card at the pump itself?

Sure, no doubt there’s some stations out in the shittiest, most desolate parts of rural MAGAmerica with pumps that were installed in 1975 occasionally seeing such thefts. It cannot be anywhere near $2,700 in under two months of the locals getting what they voted for. How the hell is it 2026 and gas stations in a global capital city are still operating on the honor system – or at least not equipped with cameras to catch the license plates of the assholes who drove off without paying? Holy shit.