Convicted felon President Trump on Sunday declared victory in his struggle against the malign pro-algae forces bedeviling the National Mall reflecting pool with a 571-word Truth Social screed.

Here it is if you REALLY want to read it:

“I just returned from a tour of various Statues, Monuments, Fountains and, most importantly, an old and run down Golf Course located throughout Washington, DC, our Nation’s Capital. Almost all of the Statues, Monuments, and Fountains have been completely renovated and restored, and are in, after suffering years of Graffiti, Abuse, and Vandalism, perfect shape. They are truly beautiful, even nicer than the day they were built. The Reflecting Pool is now in full use after suffering great damage from Criminal, Radical Left Vandals, people that truly hate our Country. They cut the lower surface of a very expensive and strong waterproof padding, in the color of American Flag Blue, and put their hands underneath the surface, and ripped it. Likewise, they cut and butchered a 350 foot long strip, with many 1 and 2 foot individual cuts, creating great damage to this beautiful piece of art that was, last week, 100 percent free of leaks, and any of the other problems it has had since its building in 1922. It never worked properly until last week and, right after July 4th, when we will drain the water to treat the damage caused by these ‘animals,’ it will again be in perfect shape. In the meantime, it is working well, the criminally made algae is gone, and the grass, which was destroyed, is being replaced shortly. The visit to Lafayette Park, opposite the front entrance of the White House, which is now complete except for a replacement of some of the original pavers, was wonderful. Lafayette Park has not looked so good since its inception in 1820! Most importantly on today’s visit, however, was the Secretary of the Interior, and his people, together with me and my staff, studying the dilapidated, worn out, and very dangerous and outdated Golf Course known as East Potomac Golf Links. Tom Fazio, the Great Golf Course Architect, and his son, Gavin, participated on the tour with us, whereupon it was determined that, on this fantastic site, with water and unparalleled views of DC’s Monuments, we will build one of the Greatest Golf Courses anywhere in the World which, importantly, will also be made available to the Public. When completed, this Course will have the ability to host Major Golf Tournaments, including The US Open, The Ryder Cup, The PGA Championship, and other top PGA Tour events. Many of the trees are badly damaged from years of neglect, putting people in great danger from falling branches, and the trees falling themselves. Additionally, the sprinkler system is gone, there is no filtration, and the remaining sprinklers are incapable of even doing 10 percent of what is needed. The grass is largely dead, the greens are virtually unplayable, and the Course is in very poor general condition but, after many years of horrendous maintenance, and little money devoted to the process of upkeep, we have determined that this location can bring tremendous success and prestige back to Washington, DC, along with what we have already done with respect to the lowest Crime Numbers in many years, and the fixing of 73 of our most important Statues, Monuments, and Fountains. The Course is virtually unplayable! Work on the new Course, which will go quickly, will begin on September 1st. Tom Fazio will be the Course Architect. It will be built through the Department of the Interior, and designed to the Highest Standards of Golf, but also in such a way that the General Public will love it. “