Categories
Uncategorized

Shark fin kid from Jaws now a police chief on Martha’s Vineyard, has yet to be punished by karma for fictional false alarm prank

Oak Bluff, Massachusetts man Jonathan Searle tells Remind Magazine that his very brief career as a child actor playing the kid who wore a fake shark fin during a scene in 1975’s Jaws hasn’t had any cosmic bearing on his current role as real chief of police in the town of Oak Bluff, which stood in as the fictional Amity in the film, thus putting Searle in the shoes of Roy Scheider’s Brody.

“Zero. Never. The only shark bite that we had was someone fishing for sharks and caught one. It was hooked, and they were dragging him into the surf, and the shark slid into him riding a wave and accidentally bit him in the leg,” the 61 year-old Searle told the outlet when asked if there had been any shark attacks during his tenure. They either didn’t bother asking if he ever had to respond to a panic caused by a kid wearing a shark fin at a beach or the answer was so terse they didn’t print it.

Asked how Oak Bluff has changed since the movie premiered over a half-century ago, the lawman said “Population-wise, it started after Jaws put it on the map. Hate to say Ted Kennedy put it on the map in the late 60s [referring to adjacent Edgartown and Chappaquiddick]. Yeah. And then Jaws put it on the map, and then visiting presidents Clinton and Obama put it on the map even more. So, our population now is, I’m guessing, two and a half times what it was back in the seventies, and a lot of year-round population. Summer population, I’m guessing roughly 22 to 24,000 year-round, and in the summer that’s easily 120 to 150,000 at least,” just ever-so-casually alluding to the day-to-day headaches he experiences on the job as top cop in a seasonal beach town, busy seasons yet to be punctuated by having to blow up a bus-sized great white shark with a flare gun and oxygen tanks.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Tate Bros arrested in Miami on UK arrest warrant

3 hours ago

Iranian strikes kill at least two US service members in Jordan

10 hours ago

Voter data Trump says China acquired is mostly publicly available

14 hours ago

Canadian outlet omits origin of smoke

1 day ago

President flexes level of commitment to lowering costs for voters

2 days ago

US hits Iranian bridge, seaport tower

2 days ago

Orange Fuhrer declares war on free and fair elections: Live

2 days ago

Jaydee cancels helicopter flight to son’s golf practice

2 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Karoline returns from her birthing lair

2 days ago

White House teleprompter guy made $100,000 on Kalshi bets

2 days ago

Wealthy Russians moving assets to overseas seizure shelters

3 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Old Man Trump spins some yarns in Pennsylvania

3 days ago

TOTAL WITCH HUNT! SOCIALIST NAZI COMMIE FASCISM!

3 days ago

Key 2024 swing state voters belatedly realize they fucked up: poll

3 days ago

Deeply amoral Trump lawyer faces Senate hearing: Live video

4 days ago

South central Texas under severe flood threat

4 days ago

Trump orders ICE to go back to killing people

4 days ago

New York City woman deeply offended by anti-Red State agitprop

4 days ago

Chipmunk semen and mercury missing from CDC parasite alert

4 days ago

DHS suspends ICE vehicle stops

4 days ago

Iraqi Prime Minister trapped with gramps: Live video

4 days ago

TACO Tuesday, now with spicy Hormuz sauce!

4 days ago

EJ Carroll collects $5.6 million judgment from Trump

5 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Kagan and Barrett testify to House hearing

5 days ago

Warren Buffett cuts off Bill Gates after Epstein email drop

5 days ago

“People tried to talk him out of it”

5 days ago

Grandpa sundowning again: Live video

5 days ago

Darlene Graham Nordone to serve out rest of brother’s term

5 days ago

WATCH LIVE: White House promotes some scam motor race

5 days ago

Judge nukes Trump IRS settlement

5 days ago

Orange Fuhrer “imposes” 20 percent toll for Hormuz traffic

6 days ago

ICE guns down another person in Maine

6 days ago

Lindsey fondly remembered for badly losing 2016 GOP primary

6 days ago

British counterterrorism cops probing fascist former MP’s murder

6 days ago

Fox News reports Trump revenue streams under Iranian attack

6 days ago

Regime “task force” to release docs on “election integrity”

6 days ago

Massive wildfire erupts outside Paris

6 days ago

Trump already using Lindsey’s death for SAVE Act: Live Updates

7 days ago

Lindsey Graham has died

7 days ago

Strait of Hormuz unopened for business

1 week ago

Wasn’t all the “negative news” supposed to be awesome?

1 week ago

Ayatollah vows revenge against Trump

1 week ago

“PRAISE BE TO ALLAH”

1 week ago

Even millionaires are struggling with grocery prices

1 week ago

Kristi 💔 Byron

1 week ago

Newsmax viewers’ expectations calibrated inappropriately

1 week ago

Orange Toddler again refuses to sign bipartisan housing bill

1 week ago

House to vote on permanent Daylight Saving Time next week

1 week ago

“Midterms are still beyond Trump’s focus zone”

1 week ago

Reflecting Pool terrorist pleads not guilty

1 week ago

x
x
x
x
x
x