Whitmer passes on Senate run

“Governor Whitmer is grateful for Senator Peters’ service. She is proudly serving the people of Michigan as governor and is not running for this seat in the senate,” says a spokesperson for Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer’s “Fight Like Hell” PAC in a statement.

“That’s not a very smart question”

“Now we’re being pummeled with stories wondering why Donald Trump hasn’t brought down prices yet,” bitches MAGA columnist

Texas cops investigating mysterious cattle abduction incident

WATCH LIVE: K$H, Tulsi, Bobby Jr confirmation hearings

Aviation safety expert gets around to anodyne condolences

Sean Duffy walks away from question about FAA leadership

Team Orange still don’t know what the hell to do about tariffs

Newly-discovered asteroid has chance to hit it big in 2032: NASA

Indonesians waste precious luxury in protest at Malaysian embassy

K$H Bingo

“FLIGHTS SHOULD BE SUPERVISED BY THE BEST EMPLOYEES”

No survivors found after mid-air collision over Potomac in DC

Seb Gorka basically tells egg price voters to go fuck themselves

Former Taco Bell manager faces trial over unlawful firing

Habba shades Kayleigh McEnany for some reason

Mr Greatest Economy Ever blames the Fed

MAGA Reich may soon drop case against Eric Adams

Menendez sentenced to 11 years in the joint

Orange Dumbass thinks Hamas was building bombs with condoms

White House rescinds Trump freeze on funding

Like they didn’t know how it was going to go for Bobby

BREAKING: ELON MUSK NOMINATED FOR NOBEL PEACE PRIZE

Tesla investors want to know if CEO is a Nazi

WATCH LIVE: Bobby Brainworms faces confirmation hearing

Supermarket massacre by man named “Sanchez” not in news

Washington Examiner: “Trump inherits bleak economic landscape”

Middle East’s savior to sign order deporting “antisemites”

Mike Pence tries to rope Senate GOP away from Bobby Brainworms

Oklahoma state school board approves “papers, please” rule

Surprise! The “$50 million in condoms for Gaza” story is bullshit

Axios “battlegrounds” illustration maybe just a tad simplistic

Orange Fatass still making shit up about water

USDA predicts egg prices to go up another 20 percent

Doomsday clock nudged again

Hegseth pulls Mark Milley’s security, orders investigation

Heavy metal found near site of fucking righteous fire

Federal judge blocks Trump funding fuckery

Stephen Miller simply oozes masculinity and confidence

Paul Pelosi hammered out quick sale of Nvidia stock before crash

Medicaid down for non-maintenance

Grassley and Durbin meow at Trump over IGs getting fired

WATCH LIVE: Blondi’s first press conference

Caroline Kennedy undorses Cousin Bobby for HHS

MAGA Congressman wants first graders to work for school lunches

Johnson tells House GOP debt ceiling lift unlikely

Danish museum says come check out their fossilized puke

“Never bow down to a tyrant”

Whitmer passes on Senate run

Low-star power MAGA “media analyst” frustrated with “narrative”

Vast majority of Greenlanders oppose US annexation: poll