
Had all these plans for a “Trump was secretly behind 9/11 attacks” satire and even went so far as to create the intentionally amateurish header image to color inside the lines of usage law because man did the fat slob look like he had a transient ischemic attack or something this morning.
Then all of his actual evil and the gruesome death of one of his top minions got in the way of what would have been a few hundred words “connecting the dots” on how Trump wanted the tallest building in Lower Manhattan so he used his Saudi connections to pay Al-Qaeda to send the hijackers and destroy the World Trade Center, the obvious joke being that it’s got more plausibility than 90 percent of the MAGA conspiracy bullshit out there. Maybe wouldn’t have been one of the all-time classics of National Zero satirical efforts measured by cleverness but it would’ve struck all the right chords. Especially how it would’ve fucking been essentially canonical to the mythos of conservative media if Trump had ran and won as a Dem instead of a Republican. Good enough for a few laughs.
Well at least it’s still September 11th for the next 13 minutes, thus this lament is timely.