Categories
Uncategorized

California voters approve Prop 50

Along with the Virginia governorship, the now extremely large Dem majorities projected in that state’s Senate and House of Delegates which now leaves a clean path for redistricting in the Commonwealth, the California Proposition 50 referendum to offset the Texas GOP’s mid-decade gerrymander was the most nationally significant contest Team Blue was running in on Tuesday and, again based on nothing but just a vibe, National Zero projects that Gavin Newsom’s retaliatory move has succeeded and probably about five Republican-held congressional districts will be nuked.

In related news Kansas Republicans on Tuesday announced that they had, for now at least, failed to get their shit together to hold a special session needed to nuke Dem Sharice Davids’s seat.

Categories
Uncategorized

Pennsylvania Supreme Court remains 5-2 Dem after retention vote

The Pennsylvania state Supreme Court has this weird-ass “retention vote” rule in which the justices have to face voters to stay on the bench rather than actually compete against an opponent. A loss would have meant that three of the five Dems would’ve been removed and the seats would be open until 2027. NBC News reports that’s all moot as voters turned out and retained the three on Tuesday.

Categories
Uncategorized

Political virtuoso diagnoses own impotence

“‘TRUMP WASN’T ON THE BALLOT, AND SHUTDOWN, WERE THE TWO REASONS THAT REPUBLICANS LOST ELECTIONS TONIGHT,’ according to Pollsters,” posted convicted felon President Trump on Tuesday after something of a rough go of it in several East Coast races and another big L looming in California, admitting his own failure to influence outcomes.

It was a decided switch from his earlier post expressing optimism about some random Orthodox Jewish community’s turnout, reading “I just heard that 32,000 Orthodox Jews around Lakewood and Jackson, New Jersey, have showed up BIG for Jack Ciattarelli. My friends in this Great Community know how important this Election is to New Jersey, and to our Country. There is still time to vote! I am asking ALL PATRIOTIC CITIZENS OF THE GREAT STATE OF NEW JERSEY, including all Kollel and Yeshiva students who haven’t voted yet, to please GET OUT AND VOTE FOR JACK CIATTARELLI. You can win this for Jack! VOTE FOR JACK, WHO HAS MY COMPLETE AND TOTAL ENDORSEMENT!”

Later, with his election night postmortem out of the way, Trump then moved onto matters more important to him and his second administration with “JUST OUT: The 60 Minutes interview of Donald J Trump, on CBS, Sunday night, was the highest rated 60 Minutes IN YEARS!”

Categories
Uncategorized

Fox News projects Mamdani elected new face of Democratic Party

Categories
Uncategorized

Zohran Mamdani elected 111th mayor of New York City

Extremely charismatic and talented leftist Dem Zohran Mamdani defeated disgraced former Governor Andrew Cuomo’s entitled, limp dick independent campaign and made an afterthought of now two-time loser now-former AM radio host Curtis Sliwa on Tuesday, becoming the first ever Muslim mayor of New York City, per National Zero’s gut feeling-based decision desk.

There’s something to be said about what a stubborn, thick-foreheaded bastard Curtis Sliwa is. However cartoonish he is, he never compromised nor even considered it when his boss and so many of his would-be allies – not to mention the goddamned president of the United States and the leader of his own party – turned against him to back fucking Andrew Cuomo because “socialism.”

“If perchance I lose on November 4th, I will improve, not move. I was born in this city. I was almost killed in this city. I’ll die in this city. I’ll be buried in this city,” Sliwa told CNN on Monday. Respect, non-grudging at that, for the red beret-wearing vigilante who never pretended to be anyone else.

As for the other authentic candidate in the race, the actual winner, Mamdani’s prooooobably going to have more trouble than he expects with fulfilling his agenda, but to be seen as constantly trying to meet those expectations while actually governing is a large part of the battle.

Categories
Uncategorized

Jay Jones elected 49th Attorney General of Virginia

Despite his campaign being declared DOA due to some pretty deranged texts sent a few years ago, Dem former Virginia state Delegate Jay Jones has defeated incumbent Republican Attorney General Jason Miyares, a bunch of people are saying on Twitter. National Zero’s position is that winning was the only thing that mattered and Jones should resign a few minutes after he’s sworn in so Governor-Elect Abigail Spanberger can then appoint a replacement who isn’t a freaking maniac.

Categories
Uncategorized

Mikie Sherrill elected 57th governor of New Jersey

Dem Congresswoman Mikie Sherrill defeated now two-time loser Jack Shittarelli Ciattarelli (three if you count a primary defeat) and will succeed Phil Murphy to become the 57th Governor of New Jersey, National Zero projects again based on a hunch from the returns that show the Democrat with a pretty freaking large lead of 26 percent at 16 percent of precincts reporting statewide.

This one’s going to sting for the fanboys. They REALLY wanted it for bragging rights and it was seen as their only real chance they had for a W on Tuesday. Expect a good “MAGA Land” for this one.

Categories
Uncategorized

Train absolutely fucks up Corvette, other cars on carrier truck

A Union Pacific freight train locomotive completely OWNED a car carrier with several vehicles – a Chevy Corvette included – in the town of Shertz, Texas on Sunday morning, News4SA reports. No one was injured in the incident that was once foretold at HO-scale setup versus Hot Wheels cars.

Categories
Uncategorized

Abigail Spanberger elected 74th governor of Virginia

Dem former Congresswoman Abigail Spanberger defeated Republican Lt Gov Winsome Sears in Virginia’s gubernatorial election on Tuesday, National Zero projects without any data whatsoever.

Call it a hunch. The forgone conclusion is the least interesting storyline to the Old Dominion State on this off-off-year election night as the real questions are of whether incumbent Republican Attorney General Jason Miyares can hang on against sort of psychotic former state Delegate Jay Jones. Possibly even more worth watching is the outcome in the state legislature. Though Dems are heavily favored to hang on to their majorities in both chambers, how much they can run up the score may still actually provide some valuable insights to the potential size of the swing voter backlash against the MAGA Reich in districts won by convicted felon President Trump’s campaign of lies last year.

Categories
Uncategorized

New York Post doesn’t report half of Floridians considering moving

“The majority of Floridians are hanging on to the ‘American Dream,’ but rising housing costs and everyday expenses make it difficult to achieve, according to a new poll from Florida Atlantic University’s Business and Economic Polling Initiative (BEPI). The high cost of living is a pressure point for the state, as 90 percent of residents are at least somewhat concerned about inflation, and 80 percent are concerned with housing affordability. Living paycheck to paycheck due to affordability issues has also become the norm, with 43 percent of respondents saying they live paycheck to paycheck, while 26 percent said they do so occasionally. Only 48 percent have an emergency fund covering at least three months of expenses. Nearly 50 percent of Floridians surveyed say they have considered moving out of Florida due to the cost of living,” the New York Post did not report on Monday after Florida Atlantic University printed that press release.

They did not, as far as search results indicate, print a story about it on Tuesday. The omission of coverage stands in contrast to their alacritous reporting of some bullshit MAGA pollster’s purported finding that a quarter of all New Yorkers were planning on leaving the city in the likely event that socialist Dem Zohran Mamdani is elected mayor. The Florida one would be a bigger deal, wouldn’t it?

Categories
Uncategorized

“Literally LIFE OR DEATH for our Country”

“Tomorrow’s United States Supreme Court case is, literally, LIFE OR DEATH for our Country. With a Victory, we have tremendous, but fair, Financial and National Security. Without it, we are virtually defenseless against other Countries who have, for years, taken advantage of us. Our Stock Market is consistently hitting Record Highs, and our Country has never been more respected than it is right now. A big part of this is the Economic Security created by Tariffs, and the Deals that we have negotiated because of them,” posted the flamboyant, histrionic drama queen that a cruel and unmerciful God still has yet to permanently incapacitate with a blood clot to the brain.

Categories
Uncategorized

Nobel Peace Prize hopeful weighing options for lethal warfare

Convicted felon President Trump, who has repeatedly demanded he be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, has in recent days been presented by his top military advisors with a range of options on what type of death and destruction can be inflicted with the goal of crippling or completely dismantling Venezuelan dictator Nicolas Maduro’s regime and capturing him, the New York Times reports.

“They said during the 2016 campaign that if he becomes president, there will never be a war within weeks and we will have wars like you’ve never seen before. It will happen immediately, and yet, I’ve gone decades, decades without a war. The first president to do it for that long a period. The world was at peace, America was prospering, and our country was on track for an amazing future,” the fat fuck had said when he launched his third presidential campaign back in November 2022.

Categories
Uncategorized

The Devil came up from Georgia, she was looking for a View to steal

There came flashes of lightning, rumblings, peals of thunder and a severe earthquake. No earthquake like it has ever occurred since mankind has been on earth, so tremendous was the quake. The great city split into three parts, and the cities of the nations collapsed. God remembered Babylon the Great and gave her the cup filled with the wine of the fury of his wrath. Every island fled away and the mountains could not be found. From the sky huge hailstones, each weighing about a hundred pounds, fell. Mediaite fapped furiously at the cursed wraith’s appearance on their favorite programme. Thunderous applause rose from the audience. The angels fell silent with confusion.

Categories
Uncategorized

First word of press release already a lie

“Beloved comedian, actor, entrepreneur, and passionate dog dad Kevin Hart has officially entered the pet care industry with the launch of Hartfelt™, a premium pet food brand designed to give dogs the same quality of nutrition humans expect for their families. The brand concept was born from Hart’s deep love for dogs and his frustration with the way most commercial dog foods are produced, often packed with fillers, harsh chemicals, and overly processed ‘meat meals’ that strip away vital nutrients. After realizing many pet owners unknowingly settle for these low-quality options, Hart made it his mission to help people support their pets as family,” says a press release heralding the launch of Hartfelt™, the first word of which was already a lie and therefore instantaneously undermining the feeling of trust the premium brand apparently intended to foster in canine families.

Categories
Uncategorized

Regime fines wind turbine firm $32,340 for two bald eagle deaths

Convicted felon President Trump is finally going to the mat against wind energy, issuing a $32,340 fine against turbine builder and operator Orsted Onshore North America for two violations of the Bald and Golden Eagle Protection Act by killing the birds without an “incidental take permit.”

And yes, this is real. Or as real as can be in a Fox News “exclusive” that says the US Fish and Wildlife Service is trying to hit Orsted with the fine for the deaths, the first of which occurred in March 2024 at Orsted’s Plum Creek facility in Nebraska. The second was in Illinois in April of this year.

The permits are actually a thing and it is a requirement of turbines situated in proximity to known bald eagle nests. Problem is here that at no point in the Fox News article is it mentioned that these incidents were a clear breach of that stipulation. In fact it was Orsted themselves that reported the deaths to the FWS. So yes, this is what you might call “arbitrary and capricious enforcement.”

Categories
Uncategorized

FBI Agents Association rips into K$H’s dumbfuckery

“The actions yesterday – in which FBI Special Agents were terminated and then reinstated shortly after highlight the chaos that occurs when long-standing policies and processes are ignored. An Agent simply being assigned to an investigation and conducting it appropriately within the law should never be grounds for termination. Director Patel has disregarded the law and launched a campaign of erratic and arbitrary retribution. FBI Agents deal in facts, and we urge Director Patel to do the same. When leadership abandons due process, it doesn’t just erode trust – it makes the American public less safe. FBI Agents must be free to focus on protecting the American people, not fear losing their jobs over third party social media posts,” says the FBI Agents Association in what’s been characterized as a “rare” response to K$H’s moronic firing of several experienced agents for the sin of being assigned to investigate January 6th-related crimes during the Biden Administration.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

WATCH LIVE: Todd and K$H’s Excellent Press Conference

16 seconds ago

Fox News-brained senior citizen actually constitutionally empowered to follow through on his bullshit rants, doesn’t

2 hours ago

Patriot arrested outside of Trump’s California golf course

3 hours ago

DCCC adds another 12 seats to target list

5 hours ago

Chuck Edwards throws in the towel after Ethics finding

6 hours ago

Axios “reality checks” Trump’s “golden age”

6 hours ago

Abdul El-Sayed wins Michigan Dem Senate nomination

15 hours ago

Stuffed toy bunny hostage situation, other matters, unresolved

18 hours ago

Minnesota MAGA Congressman hints Tom Emmer possibly dying

19 hours ago

Box-o-Wine brought evidence to White House

22 hours ago

Max Miller asks House Ethics to investigate him

24 hours ago

WATCH LIVE: Trump defense lawyer confirmation hearing

1 day ago

David Ellison bitches about antitrust lawsuits in NYT op-ed

1 day ago

British Neo-Nazi running as Tory in local UK election

1 day ago

Fox News reports Nick Shirley staging dumbassery in Ceuta

1 day ago

“Things aren’t looking good”

2 days ago

Box-o-Wine arrives at White House

2 days ago

Trump considering firing Judge Box-o-Wine over pool case fail

2 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Orange Pharaoh signs some lame executive order

2 days ago

Surprise! Jim Jordan getting in on New Jersey voter fuckup

2 days ago

Frailty, thy name is Donald

2 days ago

NYC-owned grocery stores might require “library card-esque thing” to enter, which is hypocritical because voter ID blah blah blah

2 days ago

Naoero is the new Nauru

2 days ago

Insecure old loser fails to provide his “REAL Polling Numbers”

2 days ago

Newsmax reports near-dead alcoholic agrees with abusive master

2 days ago

UK gas stations losing £194,000/day to theft since Iran war began

2 days ago

CENTCOM internally crowdsourcing ideas to defeat Iran

2 days ago

Missouri station’s “SHOOTING” placeholder not exciting enough

2 days ago

Blanche orders plug pulled on slush fund

2 days ago

Max Miller refuses to resign and/or drop reelection bid

3 days ago

Jim Jordan wrestles with basic consistency: Sunday AM live

3 days ago

Arkansas state House Republican arrested for domestic battery

3 days ago

Mentally ill president “100 percent disagrees” with crazed alcoholic

4 days ago

Houthi missile threat to critical Saudi oil processing hub “could upend Trump’s midterm message”: Politico on what really matters

4 days ago

Not-Movie Night Friday: The Shadow Over Innsmouth audiobook

4 days ago

Regime admits former Olympian didn’t damage Reflecting Pool

5 days ago

Surprise! President Blood and Soil thrilled by Ceuta rush

5 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Cabinet members deservingly suffer bleak meeting

5 days ago

Floridians advised to prevent leprosy by avoiding wild armadillos

5 days ago

Bernie Moreno taking familial frustrations out on Anthony Fauci

5 days ago

Spanish North African enclave overrun by 60,000 migrants

5 days ago

Orange Baby whines over his betrayal carrying consequences

5 days ago

Jim Jordan wrestles with very simple, easy tests of moral character

6 days ago

Talarico 51 – Picasso Face 48 in Texas: Fox News poll

6 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Creepy grampa has ideas about trucks

6 days ago

Orange Dictator really, really wants immunity from IRS audits

6 days ago

Now it’s “you can’t go to the Obama museum without a photo ID”

6 days ago

Regime gutting counterterrorism capabilities

6 days ago

Senate GOP postpones Todd Blanche nomination vote

7 days ago

Deeply unpopular tyrant speaks from his throne: Watch Live

7 days ago

x
x
x
x
x
x