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MAGA Virginia Congressworms protest Dem gerrymandering plan

Without offering much specific information about the content of their complaining – then again it’s pretty predictable – the Virginia Merucry’s Markus Schmidt reports that all five US House Republicans from the Old Dominion State are present at the capital in Richmond to protest the first step of the majority Democratic state legislature’s surprise plan to nuke as many as three of their districts, framing it as “election interference” that, per Schmidt, “undermines the will of voters.”

It’s not clear if any reporters asked where were these guys when the Texas and North Carolina Republicans obeyed convicted felon President Trump’s commands that they gerrymander out six Dem seats between the two states. What is clear is that if they were asked, the response would not be “Well we didn’t expect the Dems in the state legislature to come up with this plan that would affect us. This shit really came out of nowhere,” since that would be the honest and correct answer.

In related news, Politico reports the Trump Regime “has been backing away from campaigning against Democrats’ efforts to redraw California’s House map, appearing largely resigned to the idea it will pass given Democrats’ strong polling advantage. President Donald Trump still thinks he has the upper hand on Gavin Newsom on more salient issues.” Fat fucking baby didn’t even try, lol.

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Goth lady turns her evil hexes on Treasury Suckretary

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Atlantic Ocean seafloor hit with devastating earthquake

Untold thousands of pelagic organisms were disturbed and maybe even a few of them killed on Monday when a powerful 6.5 magnitude earthquake and a 6.0 aftershock struck the Atlantic Ocean seafloor about 100 miles east of the Carribbean island of Guadalupe, the Associated Press reports.

The tremors, which did not cause any tsunami waves, probably caused some collapses of tiny undersea caverns home to different types of crustaceans and other bottom-dwelling sea life. Or maybe like landslides that buried the poor bastards under tons of silt and rocks and shit. Horrible.

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Bad Bunny Super Bowl Halftime show unpopular with GOP voters

A new Quinnipiac University survey mostly about the NFL finds that just 16 percent of Republican respondents approve of the choice of Latino rapper Bad Bunny to headline the Super Bowl halftime show while 63 percent disapprove, which means absolutely nothing because the NFL isn’t canceling it and it’s just something for MAGAmericans to get upset about that isn’t all the grievous economic abuses being heaped upon them by the party that they vote for without question.

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Todd Blanche too scared to testify in Abrego Garcia case

At the end of a motion from the US Attorney’s Office for the Middle District of Tennessee in the bullshit criminal case against long-suffering would-be deportee Kilmar Abrego Garcia, the Trump Regime makes it clear they REALLY don’t want Donald’s criminal defense lawyer/Deputy Attorney General Todd Blanche to have to testify to Garcia’s attorneys, writing “The United States has already produced significant discovery materials in this matter. Additionally, the Acting United States Attorney – the sole decision maker in bringing this prosecution – will testify at the evidentiary hearing. For all of the reasons stated above, allowing the subpoenas to the subpoenaed parties to stand would be unreasonable, oppressive, and contrary to established federal law.”

“Therefore, the United States respectfully submits that the Court should quash the subpoenas issued to the Deputy Attorney General, Associate Deputy Attorney General Aakash Singh, and Counselor to the Deputy Attorney General James McHenry for the Nov 4, 2025 evidentiary hearing.”

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Half of “uncontacted tribes” could be wiped out in a decade: study

As many as half of the estimated “uncontacted tribes” – meaning groups like the Sentinelese on a remote island in the Indian Ocean – face destruction from outside forces if governments don’t do more to treat them like endangered wild animals who live on protected preserves, according to a very splashy new report by London-based indigenous rights group Survival International.

Not among the solutions proposed by the group is a Caucasian mercenary employed by one of the logging or mining concerns to be injured and nursed back to health by a shaman from one of the tribes, undergo a spiritual transformation in which he sees the tribe and forest connected as one, realize the error of his ways, and then lead a violent uprising against his former employers because that would be too on the nose. Best let those things happen on their own rather than have one’s advocacy be accused of simply copying from the plot of Avatar or Ferngully: The Last Rainforest.

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Sherrill and Spanberger maintain leads in New Jersey and Virginia

Dem gubernatorial candidates New Jersey Congresswoman Mikie Sherrill and her former colleague Virginian Abigail Spanberger maintain their leads over their respective Republican opponents Jack Ciattarelli and Winsome Sears in a new set of polls by A2 Insights, with Sherrill at 51.4 percent to Ciattarelli’s 46.5 and Spanberger at 53.6 to Sears’s 45.5 with eight days to go.

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Louisiana pissing away $54 million to fire LSU head coach

Louisiana taxpayers and tuition-paying students at Louisiana State University have apparently collectively decided to pay $54 million to football coach Brian Kelly to go away after a disappointing loss to Texas A&M over the weekend, NBC News reports on the failing upward of a “gridiron general” who had thus far led the team to a 5-3 record this season of extremely important sportsball.

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Swinger weirdo casts aspersions on someone else’s hygiene habits

A known swinger – as in a married person who, along with his spouse, regularly engages in sexual activity with multiple persons on a plastic tarp or “Twister” game mat laid out to protect the carpeting underneath from stains caused by the emissions of bodily fluids – used social media to badmouth the personal hygiene habits of another man on Monday. Though the swinger was not necessarily incorrect in his assessment given the other man’s unkempt appearance, the swinger’s own lifestyle habits render his heavily implied position of superior and irreproachable hygiene questionable at best, outright hypocritical at worst. Some might even prefer a dishevled alcoholic who showers and does his laundry irregularly as the lesser evil if the other is a clean-shaven human petri dish of venereal microbes that have yet to be even classified by modern medicine.

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Fat fuck Randy Fine demands DOJ denaturalize Mamdani

Obese Islamophobe Florida Congressman Randy Fine tells the New York Post he’s urged the Trump Regime’s Department of Justice to “review every naturalization of the past 30 years – starting with [New York City’s all-but-Mayor-Elect Zohran] Mamdani,” because it’s not like unfucking the ACA health insurance situation for his own constituents in the Daytona Beach area is all that pressing.

“I just think we need to take a hard look at how these folks became citizens, and if there is any fraud or any violation of the rules we need to denaturalize and deport,” said Fine, who represents a district in which a KFF study estimates “will see enrollees over age 60, making just over 400 percent federal poverty level, face 2026 ACA premiums that would be, on average, at least four times as high if the enhanced premium tax credits expire,” but Zohran Mamdani’s a foreign-born Muslim socialist.

“I know that there’s a lot of us that are very, very concerned about the enemy within – people who have come to this country to become citizens, to destroy it,” the likely severely diabetic Fine added, focused on threats to his constituents emanating from a city 900 miles away from his district.

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Nonagenarian Cameroon president Paul Biya reelected

Cameroon President Paul Biya, a 92 year-old man who recently made headlines for not being too tired to attend a campaign rally, was on Monday declared by the West African nation’s constitutional court the winner of the 2025 election, the BBC reports on the extension of Biya’s now 43 year-long rule until he’s 99 in 2032 or he finally dies in office, whichever comes first. Biya took 53.7 percent of the vote to runner-up Issa Tchiroma Bakary’s 35.2 percent share of the probably rigged election.

The ballots took a few weeks to count and schools, stores, and other public spaces were closed in several cities, including the capital of Yaounde, in anticipation of violent unrest over the results. It’s not an idle threat as at least four were killed during Sunday clashes between protestors and security forces in Cameroon’s main economic hub of Douala even before the election results dropped.

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Live from “Toyko,” it’s Peter Doocy!

At least they spelled it correctly in the chyron below the yappy nepo-hire.

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Category 5 Hurricane Melissa churns toward Jamaica

A Monday morning advisory bulletin from the US National Hurricane Center puts it very plainly to folks in Jamaica about the now-Category 5 Hurricane Melissa with “Do not venture out of your safe shelter. Catastrophic and life-threatening flash flooding and numerous landslides are likely today through Tuesday. Destructive winds, especially in the mountains, will begin by this evening, leading to extensive infrastructural damage, long-lasting power and communication outages, and isolated communities. Life-threatening storm surge and damaging waves are expected along the southern coast through Tuesday,” with similar but more limited warnings for Haiti and the Dominican Republic.

Which puts the range of outcomes for Jamaica somewhere between very bad but manageable and a cataclysmic humanitarian disaster requiring foreign assistance that the Trump Regime will not be offering, nor will it be allowing any meaningful numbers of those affected to travel to the US to seek refuge with friends and relatives already living here. In fact it’s quite likely the suffering will have been made worse for a not-insignificantly-sized cohort who over the last nine months have either been deported back to Jamaica outright or have “self-deported” to avoid the abuses of ICE.

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Jeffries headed to Illinois for redistricting push

House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries is heading to Illinois on Monday to sell Lincoln State Dem lawmakers – with a focus on the state’s Black legislative caucus – on nuking at least one of the state’s three MAGA congressional districts to offset convicted felon President Trump’s ongoing bid to rig the 2026 midterms to hold on to the GOP’s majority, Punchbowl News reports.

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Fat Baby demands some “FAKE” ad about his polling be banned

“After winning THREE Elections, BY A LOT, I am now getting the best Polling Numbers that I have ever received. People see how strong the Economy is, the Trillions of Dollars of Investment pouring into our Country, the Record Setting Strong Border (After years of millions of criminals pouring through it, totally unvetted and unchecked!), ending 8 wars in eight months, no men playing in women’s sports, no transgender for everyone, rapidly falling Energy prices, and much more!”

“Despite all of this, the Radical Left Losers are taking fake ads, not showing REAL Polls, but rather saying that I’m Polling at low levels. These are the people that I’ve been beating for years, and am continuing to do so, but by even bigger margins. These ads should not be allowed to run because they are FAKE!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Monday, minutes after another “Truth” in which he professed his excitement to be landing in Japan to meet with the Emperor.

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Iowa soybean farmers won’t tell NYT who they voted for in 2024

After introducing 86 year-old Iowa soybean farmer Larry Ory and quoting his 37 year-old granddaughter-in-law Summer about how, per Summer, convicted felon President Trump’s policies are forcing them to fight “different economic wars all at once” and that it’s “death by a thousand paper cuts,” in thier Sunday story headlined “In Trump-Friendly Iowa, the President’s Policies Have Hit Hard,” the New York Times writes very plainly that “Ms Ory said she votes in every election, but she, like Mr Ory, declined to say who she cast her ballot for last November.”

The Times then lets the words hang there while showing a photo of Ms Ory with her kids.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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