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Surprise! Nexstar axed Kimmel ahead of big acquisition bid

You will not be surprised to learn that Yahoo News reports media conglomerate Nexstar – owner of The Hill, NewsNation, and dozens of local TV stations – announced Wednesday they were preempting Jimmy Kimmel’s show on their two dozen or so ABC affiliates – which then prompted the network to put him on indefinite hiatus – as they sought FCC approval of their $6.2 billion acquisition of rival outfit Tegna, formerly Gannett Media, owner/operator of 68 local stations.

Also, sur-fucking-prise, there’s no mention of this in The Hill’s coverage of the Kimmel shitshow. On Mediaite, there’s three articles that do so in passing without making the EXTREMELY freaking obvious connection. “Last month, Nexstar CEO Perry Sook praised the Trump administration after the company announced it was acquiring rival TEGNA as part of a $6.2 billion deal, which is pending approval from Carr’s FCC,” they wrote verbatim in two separate stories. Ballsy by their standards considering that, though he quit his nightly NewsNation show in February, founder Dan Abrams said he would remain involved with the network and might’ve appeared on panel segments and what not.

It also hints at what some might’ve already guessed given The Hill’s bent: That Nexstar didn’t actually need to be nudged to preempt Kimmel and did it on their own – and it’s fair to question that they might’ve just done it anyway if they weren’t awaiting approval for the merger.

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Maldives cracks down on fake news

Maldives President Mohamed Muizzu on Thursday owned the biased fake news media by signing into law a new media regulation statute that empowers him to permanently close down outlets deemed unpatriotic or something. The AP’s article does not actually specify what the criteria are for fining journalists $1,620 and outlets up to $6,485 per violation. Probably kind of the point.

Oh and the law passed 60-0 after 33 opposition MPs were removed for protesting the bill.

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Awesome new rollercoaster thrills man to death

The Stardust Racers rollercaoster at Universal’s new “Epic Universe” theme park, which opened in May, is so freaking awesome that a guy was literally thrilled to death on the ride, CBS News reports.

In a statement a park official “was unresponsive after riding Stardust Racers and was transported to the hospital, where the guest later died. We are devastated by this tragic event and extend our sincerest sympathies to the guest’s loved ones. We are fully cooperating with Orange County and the ongoing investigation.” It’s not clear if the official then chestbumped a coworker, slammed a Four Loko, and then crushed the can on their forehead while blasting “Down with the Sickness.”

All jokes aside, is “a dude literally died on that ride” not actually kind of a selling point to zoomers and teenagers who want to get high and then the shit knocked out of them on a coaster?

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China beats US to important technological breaktrhough

Experts and policy think tankers constantly sounding the alarm over Chinese technological development outpacing that of the US were handed another chilling data point on Thursday as another major milestone in the communist dictatorship’s rush to become the unchallenged global leader in shaping tomorrow’s world: The first-ever mid-air collision between two flying cars.

The BBC reports that two Xpeng AeroHT vehicles – which really look like oversized drones with like eight propellers arrayed out from the top and not at all like “flying cars” seen in movies like Back to The Future Part II or The Fifth Element – crashed into each other during rehearsals for an airshow in the northeastern city of Changchun. At least one of the two $300,000 octocopters burst into flames, according to footage seen on the Chicom Twitter ripoff Weibo that was probably censored later. The company told CNN the vehicle had “sustained fuselage damage and caught fire upon landing,” and other reports said one person was injured but you should trust that as far as you can throw it.

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“He’s fucking me”: Trump rages over Netanyahu’s endless slaughter

Convicted felon President Trump has been privately raging over Israeli dictator Benjamin Netanyahu’s unceasing campaign of genocide against the population of Gaza and the botched attack on Hamas leadership inside of key graft source Qatar, the Wall Street Journal reports, citing White House officials overhearing Trump complain “He’s fucking me.”

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Orange Fuhrer spikes football on Kimmel

“Great News for America: Ratings challenged Jimmy Kimmel Show is CANCELLED. Congratulations to ABC for finally having the courage to do what had to be done. Kimmel has ZERO talent, and worse ratings than even Colbert, if that’s possible. That leaves Jimmy and Seth, two total losers, on Fake News NBC. Their ratings are also horrible. Do it NBC!!!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Wednesday, celebrating a massive triumph for free speech in the United States.

The fat fuck then posted he’s “pleased to inform our many USA Patriots that I am designating ANTIFA, A SICK, DANGEROUS, RADICAL LEFT DISASTER, AS A MAJOR TERRORIST ORGANIZATION.”

“I will also be strongly recommending that those funding ANTIFA be thoroughly investigated in accordance with the highest legal standards and practices. Thank you for your attention to this matter!” even though he tried to do this in his first failed term only to let it fall by the wayside after he found out that there’s no such legal mechanism for designating a domestic terrorist organization.

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Omar censure fails

Minnesota Congresswoman Ilhan Omar has been totally and completely exonerated by the House on batshit loser Nancy Mace’s motion to censure her for saying what everyone already knows about Charlie Kirk. Just four MAGAs voted against the censure: Mike Flood, Jeff Hurd, Tom McClintock, and, hilariously, Cory Mills because he’s also facing a censure for being an abusive boyfriend.

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House Judiciary GOP kills subpoena for Epstein financial docs

Republicans on spandex-wearing grapple-freak Jim Jordan’s House Judiciary Committee on Wednesday voted to table a Dem effort to subpoena the Treasury Department for suspicious activity reports on transactions involving Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell. If Dems were smarter they would’ve added Hunter Biden and been like “What? Why don’t you guys want to see Hunter Biden’s SARs? Why are you covering up for the Biden Crime Family?!?! Did Crooked Joe bribe you too?”

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Jon Ossoff being so cruel and disrespectful to Charlie Kirk’s family

How dare socialist Demonrat Georgia Senator Jon Ossoff try to change the subject away from the murder of American patriot Charlie Kirk? What does this hospital have anything to do with the skyrocketing rise of radical left violence that so many Americans see on Fox News and in their “for you” X feed every day? Can’t he even just for a second spare a thought for Charlie Kirk’s wife and his little kids who won’t ever see him livestreaming again? Who cares if Ossoff tweeted about the horrific crime once or twice when he’s said nothing to condemn the sick “Hey fascist, catch!” post by BlueSky user @AbandonKamala696969 or “LMAO Rest in piss, Jew puppet Kirk” by far left Gab user @kek1488 or thousands of others. In fact NONE of the leftards in Congress have answered for the vile garbage that their supporters have said since a decent Christian was so gruesomely murdered in front of college students who came to have an open debate with a 31 year-old man.

Elon Musk should simply ban Jon Ossoff and the rest of the party from X until they apologize for each and every single post that focused too much on Kirk being concerned about a Black pilot or essentially calling Supreme Court Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson a retard and not enough on the positivity he brought to American politics. But even then this post about a hospital should probably be looked at too because it could be inciting people to become violent and hateful.

National Zero will resume our regular coverage after this distillation of how a nation in mourning should feel a week after the devastating 9/10 attack on freedom. Never forget. Never ever.

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Comer calls gamer-coded platform CEOs to testify

“Today, House Oversight and Government Reform Committee Chairman James Comer invited the Chief Executive Officers of Discord, Steam, Twitch, and Reddit to testify at a full committee hearing on Oct 8, 2025. The hearing will examine the radicalization of online forum users, including instances of open incitement to commit politically motivated acts,” says a House Oversight press release.

“The politically motivated assassination of Charlie Kirk claimed the life of a husband, father, and American patriot. In the wake of this tragedy, and amid other acts of politically motivated violence, Congress has a duty to oversee the online platforms that radicals have used to advance political violence. To prevent future radicalization and violence, the CEOs of Discord, Steam, Twitch, and Reddit must appear before the Oversight Committee and explain what actions they will take to ensure their platforms are not exploited for nefarious purposes,” the release then quotes Comer who seems to be dimly aware that these platforms might’ve maybe been kind of problematic and where various crimes were inspired before Charlie Kirk was killed. Like years before.

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Bears kick some serious ass in Arkansas, Yellowstone encounters

Bears are racking up some big Ws against humans in the United States this month. First from a National Park Service press release, “On the afternoon of Tuesday, Sept. 16, a male, age 29, sustained injuries from a bear while hiking on the Turbid Lake Trail, located northeast of Mary Bay in Yellowstone Lake. The male was hiking alone when he encountered the bear near Turbid Lake. The hiker began to deploy bear spray when the bear made contact, and he sustained significant but non-life-threatening injuries to his chest and left arm. National Park Service medics responded to the incident and walked out with the hiker. Once arriving to the trailhead, NPS transported the hiker in a park ambulance to the Lake Medical Clinic. He was then flown to a nearby hospital for treatment. The hiker thought the bear was a black bear; however, the location, size, and behavior of the described bear suggest it might have been a grizzly bear. Bear management staff will attempt to confirm the species through DNA analysis, if possible. The Turbid Lake Trail is closed until further notice. Bear management staff are sweeping the trail to ensure no other hikers are on the trail.”

“Because this incident was a defensive reaction by the bear during a surprise encounter, the park will not be taking any management action against the bear,” the release continued. For those keeping score at home, the bear defeated the hiker in close combat, trail closed so he doesn’t have to deal with them for at least a few days, park rangers won’t kill him for the attack. So much winning.

Meanwhile in Arkansas, a 72 year-old man succumbed to his injuries caused earlier this month when a bear suffering from rabies and “distemper” ripped the man off his ride-on-mower and made his objection to the noise caused by the lawn care machinery known to the man, per USA Today. That bear was not so lucky however as it was blasted by state game wardens the next day.

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White people slow to correct lack of craft chocolate scene

“Ranger Chocolate Co is thrilled to announce the inaugural Portland Craft Chocolate Festival, a three-day celebration showcasing the region’s finest bean-to-bar makers, chocolatiers, and artisans. Taking place October 3 – 5, 2025 at Portland’s historic Olympic Mills building, the festival will feature tastings, pairings, demonstrations, and engaging conversations designed to connect chocolate lovers with the people behind the craft,” says a press release from Ranger Chocolate Company and yes the Olympic Mills building is an “urban rustic” former industrial site with its scoured old concrete floors and wood fixtures covered in a thick layer of epoxy. Where the hell did you think they were going to hold it? A friggin shopping mall or some Hyatt hotel? So basic.

“‘Portland has a vibrant craft chocolate scene, and this festival is an opportunity to bring together the best makers, innovators, and enthusiasts to celebrate the artistry and passion behind chocolate,’ said George Domurot, Founder and CEO of Ranger Chocolate Co. ‘We want to bring a positive and fun event to our community – one that honors the farmers who grow cacao, the makers who transform it, and the partners who create new experiences that elevate how we enjoy it,'” the press release continued and yes George is caucasian, has facial hair, and wears flannel shirts.

“The Portland Craft Chocolate Festival is set to become an annual tradition, celebrating ethical sourcing, sustainability” and cutting it off there because THAT is how you know this is for real a caucasian operation. Actually surprising and alarming that it took them until the third paragraph to get to “sustainability.” That should’ve been right up front and this whole freaking festival should’ve launched a decade ago at the latest. How in Christ’s name did it take white people this long to create a craft chocolate scene? Everything bespoke and artisanal that white people do – from friggin basil-scented soap to mocktails to $600 Brooklinen Egyptian cotton bedsheet sets – and THIS is the first craft chocolate festival in Portland’s history? They’re edging dangerously close to cheugy.

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QAdulteress worried Jews could take over Turning Point

From a lengthy Wednesday tweet by white nationalist psychopath Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene: “Charlie Kirk invited me to speak at Amfest a few weeks ago before he was martyred. This was after I called for AIPAC to register under FARA and said that the nuclear armed secular government of Israel was committing genocide in Gaza and killing innocent children, Christians, and people. He asked if I wanted to debate about AIPAC but made it clear NOT against him.”

“He said ‘we’ him – TPUSA, would do whatever I want on the issue…If you don’t know who to believe, between Bibi Netanyahu (a foreign country’s leader) or Charlie’s personal friends Candace Owens and Tucker Carlson, I’m posting my last text message with Charlie [bottom of the tweet shows Kirk asking Greene to debate AIPAC at the next event] Believe Candace Owens and Tucker Carlson… And I hope a foreign country and foreign agents and another religion does not take over Christian Patriotic Turning Point USA,” Greene continued, as if there was any mistaking what that other religion could be. Or that she didn’t already kind of say it int he tweet, lol.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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