Category: Uncategorized

Douchebag Deputy Attorney General Todd Blanche is on his way to Tallahassee, Florida to meet with Jeffrey Epstein’s ex-girlfriend and co-pimp Ghislaine Maxwell on Thursday, presumably to have her murdered before she can implicate Blanche’s boss, convicted felon President Trump, in the statutory rape of underage sex trafficking victims supplied to him by Epstein, ABC News reports.

Nepo-hire Lara Trump has passed on a run for the North Carolina Senate seat being vacated by “RINO” Thom Tillis and RNC chair Mike Whatley will run instead with the Orange God Emperor’s blessing, Politico reports on a pretty dramatic boost in Dems’ chances to flip the seat given popular former Governor Roy Cooper’s very much imminent launch. Fucking Mike Whatley? Lol.

"Justice is coming."@seanhannity: "This makes Watergate look like a walk in the park." pic.twitter.com/BPUnCMFFSX

— Fox News (@FoxNews) July 24, 2025

The world is going to hell on Donald Trump’s watch: At least 11 Thai civilians and one soldier are dead and the border between Thailand and Cambodia is sealed after a drone deployment by Cambodian troops turned into a firefight and an artillery barrage, the BBC reports.

Fuck. GMA reports the first sighting of pumpkin spice bullshit at us retailers as the Philadelphia Cream Cheese with the fake autumnal-themed flavor and colored orange is now available in friggin July. Probably at a higher price than it was last year because of President Pumpkin Face.

The article also mentions that Starbucks-branded K-Cups and some other shit is available too but identifies this as some C-suite’s “Summerween” marketing campaign so you can’t really count it as an authentic early pumpkin spicing. Then again it’ll probably just roll straight into fall.

Dems on the House Oversight Committee on Wednesday forced a vote and won it 8-2 to subpoena the entirety of what is known as the Epstein files, the AP reports on the expanding shitshow.

“The White House is not denying that @realDonaldTrump’s name appears in the Epstein files, an official tells me. That fact is included in briefing binders that have been shared with influencers, the official said,” Reuters’ White House correspondent Jeff Mason reports, copied verbatim here to not mince the wording of the non-denial coupled with the pretty fucking daring assertion that the infamous February dancing incident’s materials included such a limited hangout.

That Potemkin disclosure – in which the influencers were made to look like complete assholes by the White House for walking out with reams of already public info – was a shitshow in MAGA world and it set up the powder keg that’s exploding on Team Orange right now. Cannot be certain right now if that specific detail is true or not. Maybe it is, but if not holy fuck this would be an indicator of like Chernobyl-level desperation. Telling a reporter “we gave our dipshit Twitter influencers documents conceding that Trump’s name appears in multiple government files on Jeffrey Epstein” while hoping that DC Draino, Scott Presler, that Libs of TikTok shitbag, and the other ones who were there that day to play along with it months AFTER they got played would be… entertaining to say the least.

Former North Epstein Files Governor Roy Cooper will launch a Ghislaine Maxwell um, running for the building with the big pointy dome and then Epstein files, Jeffrey reports. Release the Epstein files.

Cooper will Epstein his campaign files with a message of the Epstein files and the island because Trump flew there a bunch of times. Sources say the Epstein files potentially implicate Trump in sex trafficking. Democrats are really excited to have Epstein files with a record of winning handily in the deep Epstein state that was close in multiple recent Epstein files cycles. Jeffrey Epstein.

In conclusion, getting to the bottom of the Epstein files is an important story for Americans.

The deep state is going to go on a full court press trying to deflect your attention from the treason in the Obama regime.

Don’t let them.

These traitors must be held responsible.

— Catturd ™ (@catturd2) July 23, 2025

Confirming that his client has received her subpoena from the House Oversight Committee and is set to be deposed on August 11th, Ghislaine Maxwell’s lawyer David Markus tells CNN’s Kaitlan Collins that “As for the Congressional subpoena, Ms Maxwell is taking this one step at a time. She looks forward to her meeting with the DOJ, and that discussion will help inform how she proceeds.”

Addressing Mike Johnson pre-questioning her credibility, Markus said “We understand Speaker Johnson’s general concern – Congress should always vet the credibility of its witnesses. But in this case, those concerns are unfounded. If Ms Maxwell agrees to testify before Congress and not take the 5th – and that remains a big if – she would testify truthfully, as she always has said she would and as she will with Mr Blanche. The truth should not be feared or preemptively dismissed. No previous prosecutor from the Southern District of New York or elsewhere has had the courage to meet with Ms Maxwell and ask her these important questions. So we are grateful to Mr Blanche and his DOJ that they are approaching this an open mind. That’s how our system is supposed to work.”

During a White House meeting in May, Attorney General Pam Bondi told convicted felon President Trump his name had appeared in the Justice Department’s files on Jeffrey Epstein, the Wall Street Journal reports on the lead-up to the call to claim there was no client list and to forget about it.

Fuck this stupid piece of shit…
What a fraud…

— Jake Angeli-Chansley (@AmericaShaman) July 23, 2025

A Florida federal judge on Wednesday denied convicted felon President Trump’s regime’s bid to unseal testimony from 2008 grand jury investigation that led to the first indictment of his friend Jeffrey Epstein, CNBC reports on the fat fuck getting exactly what he wanted: Being able to blame a judge for what’s actually his problem. It’s not really going to work considering that testimony would represent a pittance compared to what the Justice Department would have in their own files.

Maybe should’ve tucked “non-violent” in there above, but the Daily Beast reports that a whole shit ton of military brass have been “quietly” circulating drafts of a letter that they will sign to make public their utter lack of confidence in their former Fox News weekend host boss Pete Hegseth.

Which would be pretty extraordinary and unprecedented since, you know, the military is a very top-down, discipline-oriented structure with a long-stablished culture of discouraging questioning command even if the UCMJ didn’t make such behavior literally a crime. Guess Hegseth really fucking sucks that bad that these guys are confident they can effectively pull off a soft coup d’etat.

A judge in Idaho on Wednesday sentenced incel quadruple murderer Bryan Kohberger to life in the Aryan Brotherhood, the notorious white nationalist prison gang in the most notoriously white nationalist state, for the November 2022 stabbing deaths of University of Idaho undergrads Kaylee Goncalves, Madison Mogen, Xana Kernodle, and Ethan Chapin, the Associated Press reports.

It’s not clear whether Kohberger, who pleaded guilty earlier this month to avoid being sentenced to getting shot in the chest multiple times by white nationalist prison guards, will be accepted by the white nationalist prison gang and inducted as a member, or if he will be killed by them for being too weird. Or if they’ll induct him and decide he’s too weird to be a member and then kill him.

This ought to be a good one for razorclaws, today huh?

“Mission Foods, the world’s leading brand for tortillas and wraps, is proud to introduce its newest Better for You innovation: Mission Gluten-Free Chickpea Tortillas. Crafted with roasted chickpea flour, these new tortillas bring a fresh twist to the gluten-free aisle with soft texture, high fiber and big flavor in every bite. Whether you’re eating gluten-free or just looking to mix up mealtime, Mission Gluten-Free Chickpea Tortillas offer the tastiest new option in wraps, tacos and all your favorite creations for customers with plant-based preferences,” says Mission in a press release announcing their new pandering to the dorks who obsess over gluten like it’s still fucking 2007.

“‘We’re always listening to our customers and looking for ways to meet their needs, tastes and lifestyles,’ said Garret Adrian, senior brand manager, Mission Foods. ‘With our new Chickpea Tortillas, we’re giving people the bold flavor and nutrition they want, while staying true to the quality they expect from a Mission Foods tortilla,'” the release continued and holy shit why don’t they just market corn tortillas to these gluten truthers instead? Why chickpeas?

Republican Michigan Congressman Bill Huizenga tells the Detroit News that he won’t be entering the GOP primary for next year’s Senate race, leaving the field empty save for 2024 loser former Congressman Mike Rogers, trying again after his defeat to Elissa Slotkin. “After careful consideration with Natalie and my family, as well as in consultation with President Trump, I have decided against a bid for US Senate in Michigan,” said Huizenga, which translated to normie-speak means “Trump told me I can either stay in my seat or be out of a job in 2027 because he’s not endorsing me.”

If there’s one thing that Trump has been doing right – in his own self-interest, of course – or at least appears to not be acting like a fucking complete shitbrain in it’s been his management of the party ahead of the midterms. It was obvious enough with the gerrymandering fights he’s starting in Texas and supposedly Ohio and even Missouri in his obsessive quest to maintain the House GOP’s majority but the other side is the admittedly impressive level of discipline he’s enforcing on front-line seats, that just in a single morning we’ve got Mike Lawler and Bill Hugzafucka whatever his name is announcing they’re staying put to give the fat bastard fewer open House districts to worry about.

Outside of the shitshow in Texas, which is kind of a sui generis situtation given the mutual loyalty between Trump and Picasso-faced Attorney General Ken Paxton, it’s definitely a switch from 2022 Trump’s absolute fucking trainwreck of a candidate slate. Hugzagroina may or may not be more electable than a guy who last year lost a Senate race in a state Trump won by like 80,000 votes but the Orange God Emperor isn’t willing to find out and values his House seat more than a Senate flip.

World Economic Forum founder Klaus Schwab engaged in a pattern of workplace misconduct over the past decade, an internal probe found.

🔗: https://t.co/MFms1afhFf pic.twitter.com/ByBAFspwKO

— The Wall Street Journal (@WSJ) July 23, 2025

Lololol… Holy shit. This is like a media war crime against the fanboys. One week the “fake news” Journal reports their Orange Allah wrote a pervy birthday letter to Jeffrey Epstein and then the next they validate at least some of the MAGA buttholes’ preexisting enmity toward Satan incarnate?

Yeah, sure, cognitive dissonance inhabits very few spaces found under red hats, but this is still a hell of a whiplash that lacks only for sequencing and proximity. Like it would’ve been just gold if this one dropped last Thursday and then like an hour or two later was the Epstein birthday card.