LAPD officials this week announced that Alt-R&B artist David “D4vd” Burke, 20, is being considered a suspect in the death of 14 year-old Celeste Hernandez, a runaway whose body cops discovered in the trunk of a Tesla registered to Burke, a few days after it was towed from a spot in the Hollywood Hills where it had been abandoned by Burke on or before July 29th, People Magazine reports.

Hernandez’s remains were, horrifically, not intact and in an advanced state of decomposition when a worker at the impound lot noticed a foul odor emanating from the front trunk of the car belonging to the “Romantic Homicide” artist on September 8th, with it taking until the 17th for the medical examiner to make a positive ID on the teen. People’s reporting on her short life describes her as a troubled youth from Riverside County who ghosted on her family no fewer than three times in recent years, the last being in April 2024. Her family by that point was aware that she’d been dating someone named “David” but had no further contact with her after a brief call the next month.

People cites the Los Angeles Times’s reporting that Burke has a tattoo saying “Shhh…” on his right index finger and that Celeste’s mom had told TMZ her girl had the same on her very same finger.

Why it took homicide detectives in Los Angeles two goddamned months to name Burke as a suspect in the girl’s death is not clear. The easiest answer lies in California’s lack of a felony abuse of a corpse statute – the usual go-to in other states to keep a suspect held without bail when cops and DAs have this strong of circumstantial probable cause but still need more time to bring a homicide case before a grand jury. The state legislature might want to get on that copy and paste job.

America’s favorite Brazilian Supreme Court Justice Alexandre De Moraes at 12:08 AM local time on Saturday detected an unusual signal from disgraced former President Jair Bolsonaro’s ankle monitor and immediately ordered the asshole’s arrest on suspicion of him planning to flee, the AP reports.

“That information shows the intent of the convict to break the ankle monitoring to assure his escape is successful, which would be made easier by the confusion that would be caused by a demonstration organized by his son,” the justice said, adding he had reasonable suspicion that Bolsonaro was headed to one of any number of foreign embassies located near his Sao Paolo home.

Oh wait, the headline’s wrong because De Moraes specifically ruled that his arrest should be effected “with all respect to the dignity of former President Jair Messias Bolsonaro, without the use of handcuffs and without any media exposition.” Should change it. Still symbolically accurate, right?

“Minnesota, under Governor Waltz, is a hub of fraudulent money laundering activity. I am, as President of the United States, hereby terminating, effective immediately, the Temporary Protected Status for Somalis in Minnesota. Somali gangs are terrorizing the people of that great State, and BILLIONS of Dollars are missing. Send them back to where they came from. It’s OVER!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Friday, deciding that doing something racist, cruel, and unlikely to be legally effective is a great way to change the subject from what Marjie just posted.

My official statement. pic.twitter.com/x48zEugmPV

— Marjorie Taylor Greene 🇺🇸 (@mtgreenee) November 22, 2025

“I do not want my district to endure a hateful primary against me by the very president we all fought for—only for me to win my election while Republicans likely lose the midterms, and then be expected to defend the president against impeachment after he tried to destroy me. I refuse to be a battered wife and just hope it gets better. There is no plan to save the world, and no 4D chess game being played,” said Greene in her resignation video. Holy shit that is freaking vicious, lol.

Picasso-faced Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton on Friday petitioned the US Supreme Court to overturn a lower court ruling halting the Lone State State GOP’s attempt to redraw five red districts ahead of the 2026 midterms, hoping for a fast win before the December 8th filing deadline.

We all want NYC to succeed.

But we’ll have to agree to disagree on this one.

If he walks like a jihadist
If he talks like a jihadist
If he campaigns like a jihadist
If he supports jihadists,

He’s a jihadist.

And he’s @KathyHochul’s jihadist. pic.twitter.com/JZaM29d82R

— Elise Stefanik (@EliseStefanik) November 21, 2025

Sur-fucking-prise: Politico reports convicted sex trafficker Ghislaine Maxwell’s lawyers have informed the House Oversight Committee, Chairbilly James Comer told reporters on Friday.

“Her lawyers have replied that she’s not going to answer any questions. She’s only going to plead the Fifth. I mean, I could spend a bunch of taxpayer dollars to send staff and members down there, and if she’s going to plead the Fifth, I don’t know that that’s a good investment,” Comer said.

Sure sounds like he’s REAL upset that she’s not cooperating with his investigators. Fucking hick.

Huh… You know this said “closed press” on the pool schedule as recently as like an hour or two ago, probably because Donald’s handlers wanted to avoid an incident in which the mayor-elect got the better of him rhetorically because he gets the better of a lot of people rhetorically. Not hard to imagine that Trump found out and demanded that cameras be allowed in to the meeting.

“Today, House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform Chairman James Comer sent a letter to Bill and Hillary Clinton’s attorney, David Kendall, emphasizing that while the Committee remains engaged in good-faith negotiations, the Clintons are required to comply with lawful subpoenas and appear for scheduled in-person depositions,” says Jim Bob Cowfucker in a release.

“‘The House Oversight Committee is continuing its review of the federal government’s investigation into Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell. In July, Democrats and Republicans on this Committee approved a motion to issue subpoenas to Bill and Hillary Clinton. The Committee has since worked in good faith to schedule in-person depositions, but further delays are unacceptable. Given their history with Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell, any attempt by the Clintons to avoid sitting for a deposition would be in defiance of lawful subpoenas and grounds to initiate contempt of Congress proceedings. The Committee looks forward to confirming their appearance and remains committed to delivering transparency and accountability for the survivors of Epstein’s heinous crimes and for the American people,’ said Chairman James Comer. In the letter to the Clintons’ attorney, Chairman Comer states that Bill Clinton’s deposition is scheduled for December 17, 2025, and Hillary Clinton’s deposition is scheduled for December 18, 2025,” and blah blah blah blah.

“Two north Texas men have been charged in relation to a plot that included invading an island off Haiti, murdering the men on the island, and using the women and children as sex slaves, announced US Attorney Jay R Combs. Gavin Rivers Weisenburg, 21, of Allen, and Tanner Christopher Thomas, 20, of Argyle were named in a two-count indictment returned by a federal grand jury in the Eastern District of Texas charging them with conspiracy to murder, maim, or kidnap in a foreign country and production of child pornography. Information presented in court indicates that between August 2024 and July 2025, Weisenburg and Thomas are alleged to have conspired to recruit and lead an unlawful expeditionary force to the Island of Gonave, which is part of the Republic of Haiti, for the purpose of carrying out their rape fantasies. Weisenburg and Thomas planned to purchase a sailboat, firearms, and ammunition, then recruit members of the District of Columbia-area homeless population to serve as a mercenary force as they invaded Gonave Island and staged a coup d’etat.”

“Weisenburg and Thomas intended to murder all of the men on the island so that they could then turn all of the women and children into their sex slaves. Weisenburg and Thomas undertook numerous overt acts in furtherance of their invasion plan, including making operational and logistical plans, learning Haitian Creole language, recruiting others to join the invasion plan, and researching and enrolling in schools to acquire skills relevant to the invasion plan. Thomas even enlisted in the US Air Force to acquire military skills relevant to the invasion plan. Weisenburg and Thomas are also charged with production of child pornography in a related count,” says a Justice Department press release, adding that the two face life for conspiring to commit murder in a foreign country.

What it left out is that Gonave’s population is 87,000 people, which would be kind of… challenging for two guys and a small army of homeless Americans to seize control of. If not for the child porn then maybe the feds could’ve just let things play out and saved US taxpayers the hassle.

In an earnings call with investors on Tuesday, Home Depot CEO Ted Decker said that the retailer’s third quarter 2025 “results missed our expectations primarily due to the lack of storms in the third quarter, which resulted in greater than expected pressure in certain categories. Additionally, while underlying demand in the business remained relatively stable sequentially, an expected increase in demand in the third quarter did not materialize. We believe that consumer uncertainty and continued pressure in housing are disproportionately impacting home improvement demand. Our teams are continuing to execute at a high level and we believe we are growing our market share.”

Lol, what a fucking cuck. Fewer storms, really? Now we can sit here and question whether Home Depot’s business model is actually that reliant on a few hurricanes hitting the eastern half of the US every year like Manischewitz relies on observant Jews to celebrate Passover. Manischewitz’s model doesn’t exactly have to assume some risk that they’re all going to skip it – or swap the matzoh for Ritz – in 2026. They can count on their market to show up irrespective of the weather. It’s pretty safe to say Home Depot didn’t get to be the largest hardware retailer in the United States by crossing their fingers hoping that hundreds of thousands of houses are going to need fresh plywood to cover up their windows every hurricane season, thus it’s just as safe to say Decker is full of shit.

Why is he full of shit? Most likely because he’s terrified that telling the truth about the current state of the housing market and consumer confidence in whether adding another bedroom to their ranch house is a smart investment right now. Which would get more mainstream media coverage and accordingly be placed in the larger context of the economy. And then you know who would get upset over that and start screaming at him on Truth Social for being a terrible failing loser woke CEO.

This ad was running on Fox News this morning, per clip guy Aaron Rupar. Not clear is whether this says more about how well the “Bond Arms” company or Fox News’s ad sales businesses are doing.

Maybe lean toward the latter since this one seems like way more within Newsmax or OANN’s commercial break beats than Fox’s. Maybe the reverse mortgage industry’s the victim of its own success and has run out of seniors to bleed dry so they’re not buying ad space like they used to.

In an interview Thursday with the New Republic’s Greg Sargent on his “Daily Blast” podcast, Dem Pennsylvania Congresswoman Chrissy Houlahan told Sargent that her office responded to convicted felon President Trump’s deranged threats to have her executed over her “Don’t Give Up The Ship” video by filing a threat complaint against the Orange God Emperor with the US Capitol Police.

“Your office wrote in ‘Donald J Trump’ as the person delivering the threat?” asked Sargent. “The president,” Houlahan responded tersely. It’s not clear if filing such a report automatically initiates an investigation by the USCP, but if it does then yeah, Trump is under criminal investigation. Again.

The OpenWeb commenting platform (a product deeply inferior to Disqus on the user end) has seen its usual thread positioning under stories on Villages-News.com replaced with a message reading simply “Comments have been temporarily disabled.” The development was deeply disappointing to those among us non-Villagers who saw a letter to the editor headlined “Negative comments about Charlie Kirk cannot be supported by facts” and were eager to see the reactions to the missive submitted by Village of Woodbury resident Mary Sessions, who wrote “When I started hearing those phrases, I decided that I would listen to the whole dialogue and make my own decisions about Charlie’s character. When I did that, the whole meaning of the quote took on a different context and had nothing to do with what he was being accused of. So, I encourage people not to take what they are being told is true without doing some research on your own to get the WHOLE TRUTH!”

Possibly even more heartbreaking was the void underneath “Villagers’ problem child caught with drugs in anus after sentencing,” detailing an unfortunate colorectal narcotic smuggling mishap experienced by 48 year-old stay-at-home son Chad Basford, who’d been checking in for a 180 day vacation at the Sumter County Jail on a conviction for driving a golf cart with a suspended license, a bid imposed due to his record of five DWIs. Jail Personnel found packages of marijuana and a sleep aid “covered in fecal matter and bloody mucous” on the floor after Basford was ordered to squat naked during the standard procedure to check if he was smuggling narcotics in his anus.

No reactions from other Villages-News readers under that one because, as stated, comments have been disabled on the site. Even the non-lurid, non-politically-charged reports like “Bicyclist hit in helmet by golf ball in The Villages” are subject to this moratorium, one for which there has been no timeline of its resolution issued. Whatever prompted it must’ve been pretty fucking good.

Republican senators led by disquietingly robotic Stepford Housewife Katie Britt are lobbying convicted felon President Trump to endorse a max three-year extension of Obamacare subsidies in what Punchbowl News reports is an admission that they’re going to get destroyed next year if they don’t figure something out but also that it would “buy time for Congress to pass a longer-term health care plan that mirrors the president’s preferences.” Copied that part verbatim to lol at the notion that the fat bastard has any “preferences” beyond eradicating “Obamacare” simply because of its name.

It’s been literally eight fucking years since Trump’s GOP tried and failed to repeal it and now that Donald has the opportunity to just let crucial portions of the landmark health law expire without having to do anything. There can be no question now that he would sooner see his supplicant majorities burn than sign a bill keeping Obamacare intact. That is unless the wind in those majorities blows in that direction and passage becomes inevitable. Then he’ll act like it was his idea all along.

Which – going by John Cornhole Cornyn saying he’s “not opposed to bipartisan deals. The problem is, Obamacare was never a bipartisan deal. Democrats seem to be saying you need to swallow this partisan bill that was sold under false pretenses. That’s unacceptable” – probably isn’t happening anytime soon. Think of how many GOP members in both chambers, Jesus Dork Mike Johnson included, got their careers started by campaigning against Obamacare back in the early 2010s.

“I see the political shop on the Democratic side just churning up all the very sympathetic stories that are gonna result if we don’t come up with a reasonable plan,” warned North Carolina Senator Thom Tillis, who doesn’t have to actually worry about that since he’s not running again. Yet he persists in concern for his GOP brethren, imploring them to abandon their commitment to “principle,” lol.

“Today an individual showed up to my DC office and made white supremacist threats and hand gestures. Everyone is safe, and I want to thank Capitol Police for their swift response. But let me be crystal clear: this cannot become the norm. We’re living in a time where political violence is being fueled from the very top. When the President of United States spreads hate and lies, when he targets his political opponents, when he openly calls for the death of sitting Members of Congress, he is putting a literal target on our backs. The President should be committed unity, not more division. Some folks have questioned why I need security. This is why. Every time I speak truth, stand up for my constituents, or call out corruption, the threats get louder – and more dangerous.”

“I will not be intimidated. I will not be silenced. I will continue to show up for the people of Texas’ 30th Congressional District. But we cannot pretend that this is normal. When leaders promote hate, hate shows up – sometimes right at our door,” says Dem Congresswoman Jasmine Crockett.

Sharia law must never govern America

— Mike Lee (@BasedMikeLee) November 21, 2025

In 2021 when then-Congressional candidate Cory Mills joined an informal group to secure lines of escape from Afghanistan for people left behind by the Biden Administration’s not-terribly well-executed withdrawal, they made a pit stop in the Republic of Georgia – and Mills took the time to visit with local sex workers, NOTUS reports on more embarrassing shit for the Trump fanboy.

Are you a racist Coast Guard member bummed out because the woke service won’t let you hang a Nazi Swastika flag and/or a noose in your quarters? Cheer up! The Washington Post reports that starting December 15th, the service guidelines will move the hate symbols from their list of hate symbols to just those that are “potentially divisive,” meaning that they’ll be unbanned from display.

“We don’t deserve the trust of the nation if we’re unclear about the divisiveness of swastikas,” said some DEI Coast Guard libtard who spoke anonymously after being owned so badly.