Categories
Uncategorized

You can have Don Jr. call you for the low, low, low price of $500

Thanks to the Cameo service, Donald Trump Jr. can prostitute himself for cash, and he gets far less than his father used to charge.

For just $500, you can have Junior talk very loud and fast to you in a personalized message for your birthday, anniversary or just because it’s Monday.  (Junior really doesn’t have a need to take your money.)  Or you can give that special loved one, like an ex-wife, a personalized gift of a message from Junior.

Listing himself as an activist/author/entrepreneur/political commentator and reality TeeVee personality (but strangely, not Silver Spoon heir),  Junior claims his Cameo proceeds will go to the Shadow Warrior Project, a non-profit that supposedly provides assistance to former military contractors who were hurt on the job.  (Why their employers, like Erik Prince, aren’t responsible for taking care of people injured while fighting private wars is not explained.)

If $500 is too rich for you, you can have a personalized direct message sent to your phone for just $20, because most certainly Junior would personally send the text message.  With a five-star rating from clients, Junior seems to be a hit, particularly because he’s *so busy* he can turn around these frivolous wastes of money typically within 22 hours.

What?  Junior doesn’t whet your palate?  Then get a Cameo message from these MAGA prostitutes darlings:

  • Junior’s squeeze, Kimberly Guilfoyle ($200 for video; $19.99 for DM)
  • George Papadopoulos ($100/no DMs available)
  • Tomi Lahren ($90/no DMs available)
  • Corey Lewandowski ($70/DMs at a bargain price of $2.99.  No word if punches are included or cost extra)
  • Jacob Wohl ($50/no DMs available)
  • Sebastian Gorka ($99 for video, no DMs available)
  • Joe Arpaio ($30/no DMs available)

Caution:  Junior has a habit of plugging his family’s hotels or a conspiracy about Joe Biden not being president into his messages, so YOU’RE paying for him to advertise on YOUR dime.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Republican Florida county water official caught sexting cop posing as 14 year-old boy, blames state’s internet porn age verification law

3 hours ago

Long Islanders warned to watch out for zombie raccoons

5 hours ago

Colombian president refuses deportation flights

11 hours ago

Lindsey and Jaydee try to downplay rising egg prices

13 hours ago

Orange Ayatollah suggests removing all Gazans

15 hours ago

Yoon indicted for insurrection

15 hours ago

WHAT A STUNNING ABUSE OF POWER!

1 day ago

Flood watch issued for Los Angeles area

1 day ago

“The Media” will be lying about kids and families being deported

1 day ago

Susie Wiles limits Ketamine Brain’s access to Trump: Daily Mail

2 days ago

Mexico denies US military deportation flight permission to land

2 days ago

Movie Night Friday: Best in Show

2 days ago

Pete Hegseth confirmed to Secretary of Defense

2 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Orange God Emperor tours Los Angeles

2 days ago

Harvard Law professor wastes valuable seconds explaining why dickhead Andy Ogles’s third term amendment going nowhere

2 days ago

Navajo leader says tribe members being arrested by ICE

2 days ago

Baby Goebbels pissed elementary school wouldn’t let ICE in

2 days ago

New Jersey hit with sad, low-energy, weak earthquake

2 days ago

Oklahoma AG requests DOJ transfer prisoner for prompt execution

2 days ago

“Certainly I would not take responsibility”

2 days ago

Trump pulls Fauci’s security detail

2 days ago

Congolese governor killed in battle with rebels

3 days ago

United Healthcare hires new CEO

3 days ago

Demented old asshole doesn’t remember inviting Schiff on trip

3 days ago

Border Patrol agent’s funeral apparently won’t be a campaign stop

3 days ago

Fox News reports releasing violent felons from prison is bad

3 days ago

Puerto Rico-born veteran detained in New Jersey ICE raid

3 days ago

Orange Messiah to hold campaign rally in Las Vegas on Sunday

3 days ago

Operation “Appearance of Mass Deportation Underway” underway

3 days ago

High school dropout mistakenly screams over “guy” in ladies’ room

3 days ago

Nobody got shot in New York City for five days

3 days ago

Andy Ogles gunning hard for that pardon

3 days ago

“The problem is the president doesn’t have any leverage over him and Elon gives zero fucks”: Trump minion on AI project shitposts

3 days ago

Hegseth told Liz Warren he paid rape accuser $50,000

3 days ago

Nobody knows more about central banking

3 days ago

Orange Felon declassifies JFK, RFK, and MLK assassination files

3 days ago

Mike Johnson killed Cassidy Hutchinson subpoena over fears she would testify about sexually explicit texts House GOP sent her

3 days ago

Federal judge blocks Trump’s birthright citizenship order

3 days ago

FBI raids Rhode Island immigration lawyer’s office

3 days ago

Remote island off Antarctica in path of trillion-ton iceberg

3 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Globalist pretends he isn’t one in Davos address

4 days ago

Trump pulls security detail from Mike Pompeo, former top aide

4 days ago

Gasoline costs 3 cents more per gallon than it did a week ago

4 days ago

Ketamine Brain grateful for some Jew cred to back him up here

4 days ago

Nashville school shooter was influenced by Candace Owens

4 days ago

Fox News reports new Papist plot to undermine US sovereignty

4 days ago

“Episode 5 started with small spatter fountains”

4 days ago

Mississippi Dem intros “Life Begins at Erection” Act

4 days ago

Border Patrol ordered to summarily deport asylum claimants

4 days ago

“A country that lives in forest”

4 days ago

x
x
x
x
x
x