Categories
Uncategorized

National Zero Off-Topic: VOLCANOES!!!

Apropos of basically nothing, it’s time for a factoid-filled article about those mountains (well usually they’re mountains) that spew hot ash and lava: Volcanoes! That’s right, we’re just going to write a medium length essay about volcanoes without any connection whatsoever to current events. There aren’t any really noteworthy ongoing eruptions or major studies of volcanoes we know of that would serve as a bridge to run such a piece, but fuck it, we’re not going to let that stop us.

So getting to it, did you know that Kilauea in Hawaii and Mount St Helens in Washington State have about as much in common as a dolphin and a shark? They were formed and have erupted through the result of completely different geological processes but get lumped in together as volcanoes because of their superficial similarities. Kilauea is a shield volcano, formed via a hot spot – or a weak spot in Earth’s crust – where a concentrated plume of super hot lava melts through the bottom of the Pacific plate and breaches the surface. The Hawaiian Islands were all formed the same way, lava piling up and creating a land mass slowly over hundreds of millions of years before gradually eroding into the ocean. You can see the chain going all the way up to Siberia.

As the Pacific plate moves northward, pushed by the spreading of an oceanic ridge north of Antarctica, the hotspot in the mantle stays in the same place. If somehow the movement ceased, the Big Island of Hawaii would eventually grow to – well we have no fucking idea what would happen and the rest of the planet would have much bigger problems if plate tectonics stopped.

In the Cascades (and a lot of other places like Indonesia, Japan, the Aleutian Islands, the Andes, the Leeward Islands in the Caribbean, just to name a few), a completely different process powers the angry beast within those volcanoes. Just as the spreading of a ridge moves the Pacific plate above the Hawaiian hotspot, it pushes a smaller oceanic plate under the Northwest in what’s called subduction. As the seafloor Gorda and Juan De Fuca plates get subducted underneath the less dense North American plate, they take a shit ton of seawater with them. The friction of the rocks grinding together causes the water to boil and with nowhere to go, the vapor steadily becomes hot enough to melt the rock, which eventually causes bigger, uglier, and more destructive eruptions than the ones that happen in Hawaii. In some places the subduction occurs where one piece of oceanic crust gets pushed under another – the Aleutians, Indonesia – forming the islands from the stratovolcanoes growing from the seafloor above the subduction.

Great Sitkin Volcano near the Aleutian Island of Adak erupting in May 2021, photo by Finn Spitler/Alaska Public Media

These fuckers are also far more active than the ones in the Pacific Northwest. In continental Alaska and the Aleutian Islands, there have been at least 100 eruptions since 1900. It’s actually pretty hard to get a straight answer on that since so many have happened. Same with Indonesia. It’s like one big goddamned mess of volcanic activity. In the lower 48 meanwhile, a total of two have erupted since 1900: Lassen Peak in Northern California in 1915 through 1917 and Mount St Helens in 1980 and with interment activity afterward – most recently series of small eruptions from 2004 to 2008.

Anyway, subduction and hotspots are not the only two situations in which volcanism occurs. There are other means for volcanoes to form and erupt are much less easy to explain with any sort of brevity and our also outside of our admittedly simple understanding of the whole field of study, which is a shame because we’d really like to be able to tell you all the geological reasons why, for example, a volcano erupted near the Grand Canyon less than 1,000 years ago, or why other spots across the Western US that aren’t Yellowstone (also a hotspot, like Hawaii) or the Cascades have volcanoes that have erupted within the past 10,000 years. Colorado, Utah, New Mexico, Idaho, Nevada, Southern California – all of them have volcanoes which could erupt this century.

Well, let us know if we have to do some research and figure that shit out to follow up.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Wasn’t all the “negative news” supposed to be awesome?

2 hours ago

Ayatollah vows revenge against Trump

8 hours ago

“PRAISE BE TO ALLAH”

17 hours ago

Even millionaires are struggling with grocery prices

23 hours ago

Kristi 💔 Byron

1 day ago

Newsmax viewers’ expectations calibrated inappropriately

1 day ago

Orange Toddler again refuses to sign bipartisan housing bill

1 day ago

House to vote on permanent Daylight Saving Time next week

1 day ago

“Midterms are still beyond Trump’s focus zone”

1 day ago

Reflecting Pool terrorist pleads not guilty

2 days ago

McCarthy can’t think of any Republicans similar to Platner

2 days ago

Palm Beach International now officially Donald J Trump Airport

2 days ago

Trump looks past partisan divides, sees in Graham Platner a fellow human being credibly accused of sexual violence against women

3 days ago

Orange Idiot cites some bullshit as pretext for birthright rehearing

3 days ago

Peace president bombs Iran again

3 days ago

Maine state House member says Platner backs her to take over

3 days ago

WATCH LIVE: More deranged bullshit to embarrass Americans

3 days ago

NATO chief says Trump “absolutely right “about Greenland

3 days ago

Beshear demands proof of life from Cocaine Mitch

3 days ago

Mentally ill old man yells at reporters in Turkey: Watch Live

3 days ago

Oil rises, Dow Futures drop after Trump says ceasefire over

3 days ago

Zohran Mamdani is a socialist with his city grocery store plan

4 days ago

Iranians bombed again because the last five bombings didn’t work

4 days ago

Federal judge nukes Georgia 2020 election subpoena

4 days ago

MAHA mom charged with suffocating “vax victim” twin toddlers

4 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Turkey neck chills with Erdawg

4 days ago

French court ubans Marine Le Pen from office

4 days ago

White nationalist deeply offended

4 days ago

Orange Tyrant still pushing his bullshit “SAVE America Act”

4 days ago

Shark fin kid from Jaws now a police chief on Martha’s Vineyard, has yet to be punished by karma for fictional false alarm prank

5 days ago

Kevin McCarthy has thoughts about Platner rape accusation

5 days ago

Maine Dems call on Platner to quit

5 days ago

Patriotism situational

5 days ago

FIFA spikes Belgian appeal to Trump corruption of ref call

5 days ago

Graham Platner cancels campaign stops ahead of bad story

5 days ago

Tinpot dictator goes on state media to pander to wealthier dictator

5 days ago

Euro football leadership rages over Trump interference

5 days ago

At least 25 dead from heat in New Jersey alone

6 days ago

Desperate times call for…

7 days ago

DC Independence Day Parade canceled due to heat

1 week ago

Iranians mark July 4th with state funeral for Ayatollah

1 week ago

WATCH LIVE: America’s Hitler at Mount Rushmore

1 week ago

Great American State Fair closed due to climate change hoax

1 week ago

Black Floridian stands her ground in Walmart parking lot

1 week ago

Flagging enthusiasm

1 week ago

Former Olympian indicted for touching National Mall reflecting pool

1 week ago

House GOP leaks counter-investigation warning shot to Semafor

1 week ago

Naval aviator missing in Persian Gulf after chopper crash

1 week ago

Peace protestors celebrate King Kong’s historic achievement

1 week ago

Lame, derivative Bond villain has fucking meltdown on CNBC

1 week ago

x
x
x
x
x
x